Read this Before

I want to say that don't judge a book too quickly based on the starting chapter, the writing quality might be a bit poor but if you read until

: I am not Gay

Rain fell like someone upstairs had finally given up on holding it together.

Leon stood near the rooftop edge, hoodie soaked, phone dead, hope long buried beneath six layers of sarcasm and emotional damage.

This was supposed to be his thinking spot. The high ground. A quiet place to question life, contemplate dropping out and maybe scream into the void like a normal emotionally repressed teenager.

But the void had other plans.

The rusted door creaked open behind him.

'Oh no.'

'Please not him.'

"Yo," Devon's voice sang, smooth and stupid. "You always come up here when you're brooding. Kinda hot, honestly."

Leon turned his head very slowly. The look on his face could kill crops.

There he was—Devon—his stepbrother of three months. Wearing an unbuttoned shirt that revealed more chest than decency allowed, and a smirk that belonged in a government watchlist.

Leon's soul attempted to leave his body.

"You again?" he muttered.

Devon leaned on the railing beside him, way too close. "Don't act like you're not happy to see me."

"I'm happier when I have food poisoning."

Devon grinned. "You've got that 'traumatized main character' vibe today. Real mysterious. I like it."

Leon stared at him like he was an unexpected final boss. "You know what I like? Personal space. Have you ever heard of that, or did your parents raise you inside someone else's lap?"

Devon chuckled. "You've got such a sharp tongue, Leon. Bet it'd be fun if you used it properly."

Leon's eye twitched.

"You're flirting with me," he said, blinking slowly. "Again."

"I flirt with everyone," Devon said casually. "But you're the only one that makes it interesting."

"I am your stepbrother and I don't like men."

"We're not blood-related" Devon ignored the other thing he said, as he thought would open up soon enough.

"I don't care if we were raised in separate timelines. You came into this family the moment your dad married my mom. That makes this weird. You trying to make this weird-er is illegal in three countries and morally disgusting in all of them."

Devon sighed dramatically. "You say that now, but in all the best stories—"

Leon pointed at him. "Finish that sentence and I'm pushing you off this roof."

Thunder growled overhead as the universe agreed with him.

Leon turned back toward the city. Rain plastered his hair to his face. This was fine. He could pretend Devon didn't exist. He could survive the apocalypse if needed. He just had to—

Crack.

Lightning split the sky.

His instincts screamed—too late.

The bolt slammed down like the judgment of a very done god.

Straight into Leon.

Pain exploded across every nerve like he'd been slapped by the heavens with interest. His feet left the ground. Everything turned blinding white.

Somewhere in the background, he heard Devon scream, "LEOOONNNN—!"

Of course, he lives, Leon thought bitterly. Because the pervert gets plot armor.

Then: nothing.

Just static.

And silence.

Darkness.

Not the poetic kind. Not the "stars-blinking-in-the-void, gentle-slumber-of-the-universe" kind.

Just… pitch black. Dry. Blank. Boring.

Leon existed—or something close to it—but his body didn't. No hands, no legs, no sense of time, not even the comforting buzz of existential dread.

Only thoughts.

Which, as it turned out, was a horrible mistake on the universe's part.

'So this is death?' He thought. Feels like being put on hold by customer service... forever.

No pain. No noise. No weird tunnel of light.

Just a floating nothingness.

Oddly peaceful, if you ignored the fact that he might've peed himself during the lightning strike. Not that he could check. Nobody. No shame. Win-win?

A silence stretched.

Then, slowly, his mind clicked back into motion.

Wait.

'Did I seriously just died via lightning bolt?'

'That's so lazy. At least give me a truck. A magical relic. An ancient vending machine. Something with flair!'

He tried to sigh, but again—no lungs. Just vibes.

Still, the more pressing realization floated up next.

'I'm free.'

'Free from Devon.'

No more hallway ambushes with shirtless attempts at seduction. No more hearing "We're not blood-related" as a conversation starter over cereal. No more being the unwilling object of a man who thought "boundaries" were a social construct.

Leon would've wept if he had tear glands.

'God. Thank you. Or Zeus. Or whoever fired that bolt. MVP.'

There was no real regret, surprisingly. No montage of family photos. No longing to finish school or hug his mom.

Honestly? He died doing what he loved most: avoiding people and roasting his enemies with sarcasm.

'I lived with a pervert and died with my dignity intact. That's more than most get.'

Maybe this was it. Just an eternal void. A quiet, awkward afterlife, like being stuck at a party where you don't know anyone and the music's too loud to cry.

Well. At least it's not Devon.

Pause.

Unless… wait. He didn't die too, right?

Suddenly, panic.

'Oh god. What if he also got isekai'd? What if he shows up later with abs and a tragic backstory, calling me "darling" in elf language?'

Leon's non-existent soul shuddered.

No. Please. Anything but that.

He would rather fight a demon lord with a spoon than share another timeline with that menace.

But the universe wasn't answering. It was quiet. Almost like it was watching.

Plotting.

Or worse… 

The void trembled.

Not visually, because there was still nothing to see. But something shifted. Like the entire black space just... flinched.

Leon's thoughts paused mid-ramble.

'Wait. What was—'

A sound—not quite a voice, not quite a vibration—reached into the nothingness.

Something 'noticed' him.

And then the pull began.

Not painful. Not gentle either. Just… absolute. Like a cosmic vacuum cleaner had decided, '"Yup, this one's mine."'

"HEY—!" Leon tried to yell, but all he managed was a thought-shaped scream.

The void shattered.

White light. Blinding. Warm. It peeled the dark away like old wallpaper. His senses—still fuzzy, still forming—registered... something enormous. Ancient. Vaguely humanoid. Like someone had wrapped a black hole in a ceremonial robe and slapped on a glowing mask for style.

The presence towered before him in a realm without a horizon. Stars spiraled in the distance. Gravity did whatever it wanted. Reality was doing backflips.

Leon floated like a bug in the presence of a nuclear god-like entity.

"Ah," the being said, voice deep and oddly casual. "You're the one I hit."

Leon's thoughts tried to process that, failed, and defaulted to sarcasm.

'...Excuse me?'

"You weren't supposed to die," the entity continued, matter-of-fact. "Bit of a misfire. Wrong angle. Wrong rooftop."

It waved a celestial hand. "The target was two buildings over. The guy was about to sacrifice his goldfish for demonic insurance. Messy business."

The actual reasons were something he couldn't tell the mortal but it was a misfire on his side.

Leon stared.

'You hit me. With lightning. By accident.'

"Technically, yes."

'You—You uninstalled me from life like a software glitch.'

The being tilted its head, unbothered. "Well, when you put it like that, I sound careless."

'YOU THINK?'

The entity raised a glowing palm, a flicker of something resembling shame—or maybe it was indigestion. Hard to tell with cosmic beings.

The fact that it could read his mind, Leon didn't even give it much thought as he felt only natural for being that looked like a god to do that.

"To compensate," it said grandly, "I'll offer you what mortals crave most in the wake of untimely death."

Leon braced for the cliché.

"Isekai?"

"Correct."

'Of course.'

"You shall be reborn into a new world," the entity boomed. "A realm of swords, magic, monsters, and tragic backstories."

'Let me guess. Overpowered cheat? Broken bloodline? Mysterious destiny?'

"Possibly. Depends on your attitude. And narrative karma."

Leon groaned.

Even in death, there were catchphrases.

The entity's voice softened slightly. "You were the only death on your planet today. That grants you... priority. A cleaner slate. A stronger start. Fate, as you know it, is offering you a reroll."

Leon's thoughts paused.

No school.

No bills.

No Devon.

'...Okay. I'm listening.'

The godlike being's eyes—or what passed for them—glinted with amusement.

"Then prepare yourself, Leon. Your new life awaits."

Leon floated in silence.

The grand cosmic proclamation still echoed: '"Your new life awaits."'

Then, without warning—

"Wait, wait, wait," Leon said. Or thought. Whatever counted as shouting when you were a floating soul with no mouth.

The being paused, visibly annoyed. "Yes?"

"You're just gonna throw me into some sword-and-magic death circus without gear? No tutorial? No bonus? No starter pack?"

The being raised an eyebrow—'or simulated the emotion of eyebrow-raising with divine particles, whatever.' "You're being reborn. Isn't that enough?"

Leon folded his nonexistent arms. '"I didn't even sign up. You fried me like a leftover dumpling. At least give me hazard pay."'

There was a beat of silence.

Then the being sighed. "Humans."

"Reincarnated humans," Leon corrected. "We have standards now. Forums. Tier lists."

Another sigh. More celestial.

Leon pushed on. "Look, I'm not asking for a 'One-Punch God Slayer Physique' or a 'Heaven-Defying Grandma Artifact.' I'm just saying... throw me a bone. Or a bloodline. Or, you know, a modest world-breaking treasure."

The figure stared at him for a moment.

Then, to Leon's surprise, it laughed. Low, amused, rumbling like a solar flare trying to chuckle.

"You've got nerve," it said. "I respect that."

"Good. Now translate that respect into loot."

The entity shook its head slowly, but the amusement lingered. "I can't give you power outright. The laws don't allow it. I'm not a god, kid. Just someone from the @%!@##$ Realm who happened to be—"

It made a vague gesture toward existence.

"—strolling. Through galaxies."

Leon blinked.

'Strolling. Through galaxies.'

Leon wasn't able to comprehend what realm he said but he didn't give it much thought.

"You're telling me I got smoked by a divine tourist in cosmic pajamas?"

"Technically, yes."

Leon mentally screamed into the abyss for five seconds, then regrouped.

"Fine. If you can't give me a cheat, then give me a chance."

The being's mask tilted. "A chance?"

"Yeah. Seven. My Lucky Number. Seven draws. Seven chances to pull something rare, strong, broken—whatever your realm's equivalent of gacha is."

There was a long pause.

Then, slowly, the being extended a glowing finger.

"Done."

A shimmering circle appeared. Intricate. Rotating. Seven empty slots, waiting to be filled. It looked like a divine lottery wheel forged by bored immortals with too much time and too many aesthetics.

Leon whistled. "Now we're talking."

"You get to spin this wheel seven times," the entity said. "Each draw will yield one reward—a trait, an item, a blessing, or... nothing, everything coming from my treasury."

Leon flinched. "Wait, 'nothing' is on the table?"

"Of course. It's luck-based. What did you expect—guaranteed SSR?"

He muttered under his breath, '"Gacha hell follows me even in death."'

The being chuckled again. "Shall we begin?"

Leon stared at the spinning wheel, eyes gleaming like a degenerate gambler facing a divine slot machine.

"Spin it."

Gacha Hell is Real, Even in Death

– "Gacha Hell is Real, Even in Death"

Leon stared hungrily at the glowing, cosmic wheel. Seven spins. Seven shots at glory, power, and the chance to avoid becoming monster chow in his next life.

"Alright," he muttered, focusing his non-existent energy. "Spin number one. Let's go!"

The wheel turned, colors blending into hypnotic swirls. With a flash, the first slot stopped, lighting up with a gentle green glow.

Leon's imaginary heart sank.

[Reward: Rare-ranked Treasure – Spoon of Infinite Soup]

"Excuse me?" Leon sputtered.

"A useful item," the entity said, utterly deadpan. "Generates endless soup."

"Great," Leon groaned. "I'll fight demons with infinite chicken noodles."

The cosmic being ignored him. "Second spin commencing."

The wheel spun again, landing this time on a slightly more reassuring blue glow.

[Reward: Uncommon-ranked Treasure – Cloak of Mild Invisibility]

Leon brightened slightly. "Invisibility sounds cool."

"Mild invisibility," the entity clarified. "Only works when nobody's looking."

Leon's optimism shattered like glass. "That's literally useless!"

"Perspective matters, young mortal," the entity chided. "Again."

Third spin. Another lackluster green flash.

[Reward: Common-ranked Treasure – Boots of Slight Comfort]

Leon mentally screamed. "Are you mocking me?"

"No," the being said, almost convincingly. "Comfortable footwear prevents blisters."

"Oh sure, because blisters are the real threat in a world of magic and monsters."

"Spin again," the being sighed.

Fourth spin. The wheel halted on a brilliant violet radiance.

Leon's nonexistent jaw dropped.

[Reward: Legendary-ranked Treasure – Orb of All-Elemental Affinity]

Leon's mind went blank. "What does that even mean?"

"It grants you natural affinity and resistance to all known elements," the entity explained reluctantly, clearly regretting the loss. "Fire, water, earth, wind, light, darkness, and everything in between."

That was a treasure even he himself wasn't able to use. Despite its rank being low, he didn't sell it or exchange it, hoping one day he would be able to merge with it, but it seemed fate had other plans.

Leon did a mental victory dance. "Now that's what I call plot armor!"

The being grumbled audibly. "You still have spins remaining."

Fifth spin. Another dazzling violet flash erupted.

[Reward: Mythic-ranked Treasure – Dimensional Hourglass]

Leon stared. "Hourglass?"

The cosmic being audibly groaned, sounding genuinely aggrieved for the first time. As great as the orb was, it wouldn't give affinity at the rank that would have likely been needed, and having all affinities wasn't that appealing to him. "A dimension separate from reality. Inside, time flows one thousand times faster. A treasure nearly matching my realm's temporal distortions."

Leon paused. "So… it's like infinite study time?"

"Or infinite napping," the entity muttered bitterly. "Two more spins."

The sixth spin landed on a deep silver glow.

[Reward: Rare-ranked Treasure – Ring of Minor Regeneration]

"Regeneration?!" Leon perked up again.

"Minor," the entity emphasized, enjoying this bit of payback. "Enough to heal scratches and bruises quickly. Don't expect regrowing limbs or surviving mortal wounds."

Leon sighed deeply, still grateful. "Better than soup spoons, I suppose."

The being chuckled dryly. "Final spin. Make it count."

The wheel spun dramatically, coming to a rest with a resounding cosmic chime.

A bright golden glow lit the final slot.

[Reward: Epic-ranked Treasure – Blade of Convenient Sharpness]

Leon's nonexistent eyes narrowed. "Convenient…?"

"A weapon whose sharpness adjusts conveniently. Dull when sheathed, razor-sharp when drawn."

Leon considered. "Okay, actually not bad."

"Indeed," the entity conceded, sounding relieved it was over. "May your luck serve you well, mortal."

Leon mentally bowed. "I'll make good use of the infinite soup, at least."

The entity's mask shifted into something like a weary grimace. "Your next life awaits, gacha-addict. Use these treasures wisely—or foolishly. The choice is yours."

With that, the realm spun, twisted, and faded around him. Leon was now ready to dive into a new world, armed with overpowered treasures, comfort boots, and far too much soup.

The wheel faded into glittering dust, drifting into the void like confetti at a funeral. Leon floated silently, clutching his imaginary inventory with the pride of a squirrel hoarding nuclear acorns.

"Alright," he muttered. "Not bad. Not great. But not bad."

The entity loomed above, arms folded—if those were even arms. "Satisfied?"

"Mostly. I'm just praying the infinite soup isn't the peak of my power arc."

"There are realms where that spoon could start a religion," the being said darkly.

Leon blinked. "...Okay, now I kinda want to visit those."

The entity ignored that. "Now then. Prepare yourself. I shall reincarnate you into the world of Velaria."

Leon perked up. "Velaria? Cool name. Sounds fantasy. Got elves? Magic? Political drama with unnecessary shirtless duels?"

"Yes. And far worse," the entity said grimly. "You'll be reborn in the Lower Domain of the Earthly Plane. The lowest rung of the mortal ladder. Filthy, dangerous, merciless."

Leon squinted. "...So fantasy Detroit?"

"Worse."

"Oh."

"There, your treasures will not be recognized for what they are. Most will think of them as trinkets. You'll begin with nothing—no reputation, no backing, no noble blood."

Leon raised an eyebrow. "Wait. Don't I get to pick a race? Starting area? Respawn point? Maybe a cool scar?"

"No."

"...Wow. Harsh."

"You'll be born as a human commoner. Orphaned, of course. In a dirt-poor village plagued by beasts and bandits."

Leon winced. "That's a bit cliché."

"It is," the entity admitted. "But it keeps expectations low."

Leon nodded thoughtfully. "Fair. Good writing tactic."

"Your memories will return at age seven. Until then, you'll just be... a regular crying baby."

Leon looked genuinely horrified. "You're telling me I have to do the tutorial... as a literal infant?!"

"You'll live. Probably."

The being had already imagined if he died before that he would quickly retrieve his precious treasure, if not he wasn't fated for them to begin it.

"That was the most I would do," The being was still grumbling about the dimension of time it had lost. It had to give that one away, but its pride wouldn't let it say anything.

Leon sighed. "Fine. Let's get this over with."

The entity's form began to dissolve into starlight, its voice echoing one last time:

"Survive, Leon. Grow strong. And perhaps one day, you'll climb the realms... and reach the truth and perhaps even meet the real me."

The light swallowed everything.

The starlight thickened, wrapping around Leon like a cosmic burrito. Power crackled in the void, folding reality like laundry before a divine departure.

He could feel it—his soul pulling, unraveling, reforming, ready to dive headfirst into a world of swords, sorcery, and probably a lot of unpaid labor.

The voice echoed one final time, fading like the end of a dramatic trailer.

Leon's consciousness began to blur. His thoughts turned wobbly, stretchy like they were being squeezed through a celestial pasta maker.

But then—right before the transition, right before he slipped fully into the spiral of light—it hit him.

'Wait.'

'WAIT.'

'HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET THE TREASURES?!'

His thoughts screamed into the void, flailing in sheer existential panic.

'Do I get them in a chest?! Are they sealed in my soul?! Mailed to my crib like magical Amazon Prime?! I NEED LOGISTICS, DAMN IT!'

But it was too late.

The light had already claimed him.

Leon's soul plummeted into the new world, screaming all the way down—not from fear, but from sheer organizational anxiety.

'NO, I DIDN'T ASK ABOUT DELIVERYYYYYYYY—!'