“Wish dad will come to celebrate with us, just like before.”

It was nothing but a simple wish of my son on his sixth, and last birhtday. It was heart wrenching when I remembered how my mate, and the most looked up alpha in Night Howl Pack, never even bothered to care for me nor his own son.

I had to get, all the way to some of his meeting schedule just to ask for him to come to Balto’s upcoming seventh birthday. No, it wasn’t asking, it was more of a begging. Only after that, Balthar reluctantly agreed to come.

Balthar, however, didn’t appear the night of Balto’s supposed to be merry seventh birthday. Worse, Balto had his last breath away in the same night his father abandoned him yet again.

As Balthar was out of reach for contacts, I managed all the funeral matters on my own. Every time cursing my failure to protect the one mattered the most in my life.

My mind burst into deep seething anger when I know that Balthar was out with Nayra to have some ancient glowing fruits wonders in a neighboring pack’s territory.

They were having the time of their lives while my son lost his life!

I immediately returned to the pack house. I’m leaving this madness, loveless, marriage I had with Balthar. To hell with mating bonds arranged by fates!

Ironically, Balthar begged for my forgiveness when it was way too late.

I scowled at him, "Forgive you? You’re treating this far too lightly.”

***

Nayra.

She was my sister, the center of everyone’s attention, including my own mate Balthar.

From the very beginning of their meeting, Balthar had set his eyes on Nayra. So, by the time the three of us reached the age of mating, things went chaotic for us three, and our families of course. While fate had tied me to be Balthar’s mate, he refused to acknowledge the bond and continued placing his heart for Nayra.

The pack said that the strongest bond after the pack was the bond of mates.

The way I see it, though, the emotional ties of first love was far stronger over mate bond. Just like how Balthar was so devoted to Nayra.

And that was so true with his absence around us. Even today, on the day I finally burried Balto, Balthar was nowhere to be found—Not at the funeral that I had to arrange solo, not at the pack house, not anywhere near—nada.

I secretly thanked the Moon Goddess for Night Howl Pack had their own policy about the living arrangement in the pack house. Instead of the usual communal living where the pack alpha’s closests confidant would live together with his family, we lived pretty much on our own.

If that wasn’t the case, I bet our family would already be the talk of the pack for the Alpha was seldom presence at his own home. Only Balto and I would be in the pack house on his behalf.

I returned to this place with one thing in mind: to pack out, as fast as I could then leave.

How wrong I was to assume I could just do that.

The moment I opened the door to our living area, the memory of Balto’s excitement when he eagerly gave his mini presentation on dinosaur footprints, with that sketchbook of his caused me to falter.

Tears brimming in my eyes. My heart faltered but I remembered I had to press on because as much as this place held my sweetest memory with my son, this place was also the source of my pain.

A reminder of Balthar’s neglect, and his blatant affair with Nayra.

I collected each one of Balto’s portrait, wiping the tears that fell on my cheeks every now and then. I found myself slightly stopping when I had to collect his scetch books.

I know moving with more luggage also entailed more expenses that I had to paid. But these sketchbook... they worth millions since I could not find something as valuable as this anywhere else.

Every reminder of my son were either packed up and some of it I needed to let go. I chocked up another sobs as I was reminded that the current absence of my son was permanent. He went to a better place, in the celestial meadow of the Moon Goddess. A place I couldn’t reach.

I went downstairs with my second suitcase and was soon greeted by the two people I didn’t want to see the most.

“You’re going somewhere, El?”

My glance snapped at the guest hall’s entrance arc. There, Nayra was looking at me with that sad look which I could only believe was nothing but pretense. Beside her, Balthar stood tall, guiding her in in his arms. Compared to Nayra, he didn’t even seem to care with my presence.

Just like usual.

I had grown accustomed to this.

Even before our marriage, Balthar would’ve ignored me whenever Nayra was around. It had happened since the younger days of our lives, during the alliance meeting between Night Howl, Balthar’s current pack and Galeclouds, Nayra’s and my birth pack. So, when the time comes

I tightened the grip on my suitcase. With the first suitcase was already by the entrance arc, I proceed to walk myself out of this place.

“Elmyra, when are you going to stop acting like this again?”

My steps went on an abrupt stop. I turned, I wish my look alone could cause him to bleed when I shot a glare at him.

Balthar looked at the suitcase in my possession, before shaking his head like he was the most disappointed person in the world then looked back into my eyes.

He was the one absent from my life, from Balto’s life. How dare he threw me that acusing look?

Nayra, while already leaning onto Balthar’s broad shoulder, was pulling his arm to get imposibly closer. "Elmyra, I was feeling dizzy moments ago. Alpha Balthar simply took me to the pack house so that I could rest. Please, don’t misunderstand."

Misunderstand? Yeah. It wouldn’t be a misunderstanding when it was clear that the two of you had smashed into one another and were practically glued together.

Bitterness jumped up to my tongue. They disgusted me and I wanted to call out names at the two of them.

Memories of my mating night with Balthar was a rough one. Thinking that it was just how werewolves had to consumate their mating process, I still went out my way to work the day after.

A rouge was robbing me on my way home from office. With the weakened state that I had, I was injured in the process. I was lucky few witness were there and they eventually called the ambulance for me.

Balthar never cared. Instead, he replied with coldness that broke my heart over our mind link back then, “You’re still alive, right? Injuries can heal. Don’t bother me with simple things like this."

He closed off the mindlink, just like that.

That day, I was wrecking my brains out. I was his fated mate, his Luna. Why did he treat me that way?

I was kidding myself, thinking that Balthar would one day loved me back because he was my fated mate.

I was done with the lies I made for myself.

"I’m doing us a favor, Alpha. You wanted me to be gone from your life, right? Now I want the same. I’m leaving," I said before proceeding to leave.

Balthar never said it, not to my face, at the very least. Yet, anyone with good eyes and sound mind would’ve been able to see that he never wanted our mate bonds, let alone our marriage.

Only now, I had the courage to admit that whatever we had was the dictation of our customs. He had tried his utmost for our mate bond to eventually break.

That was the reason why he never acknowledged me nor my wolf. It was also the reason my body growing weaker the longer I stayed in this cruel marriage. The pack healers and doctors alike and mentioned that my connection with my wolf had deteriorated to a worrying state.

It made me wonder if my family heirloom, the Lunar Crystalis could even healed my condition.

As I reached outside, to the open area I waved at the horse carriage that were often stationed nearby the gate of the pack house, signalling that I wanted a ride.

Suddenly, A strong hand caught me by the shoulder and spun me around.

“Are you trying to get my attention now?” He asked, disdain lingered in his vocie. “Think you no longer can use your son for an excuse, so now you’re making bold moves yourself?”

His words were a blow to my heart.

Balto had fallen ill around spring last year. It started with symptoms of him vomiting his food, losing his appetite, and eventually the veins on his body went visible on his paling skin and it turned darker blue and slowly into the sade of black by the day.

Initially, I tried to contact Balthar. Desperately linking our minds asking him to at least come and see Balto’s condition for himself. Instead, he was adamant on thinking that I was using Balto to gain his sympathy.

Knowing that I couldn’t rely on him, I used the pack’s connection as far as my title as the Luna could reach. I called all the best healers in and around Night Howl Pack to figure out my son’s condition. I went back and forth to find the modern doctors too but I got no answer.

None understood what had happened and how to treat his condition.

That illness was one that finally claimed Balto’s life.

“Believe whatever you wanted to believe, Balthar,” I called his name, ditching his title and that seemed to had caught him off guard.

By then, I saw saw Nayra finally catching up to us from the pack house, I slapped his hand away off my shoulder.

But, before I could anticipate his next move, Balthar continued his false accusations.

“Your new tactic works, Elmyra. Congrats Now drop the attitude and get inside,” he said, grabbing one of my suitcase and was about to take it inside.

“No!” I yanked the suitcase as hard as I could. A wolfish snarl escaped my throat and Balthar let go of my suitcase.

I backed away with my breath raging, my eyes locked into Balthar’s widened one.

Suddenly, Nayra came between us and pulled Balthar into her side. “Elmyra, is this because Balthar couldn’t come to Balto’s birthday, is it? I get that you are upset, but is it worth for you to go this far?”

A scoff escaped my lips.

Nayra turned to Balthar. “Alpha, I knew you should’ve cancelled our trip for the glowing apple festival….”

"There’s no need for that. There’s still birthday celebration next year. But the ancient apple tree in Dawnwynd Pack only glow every 75 years. We had to wait if we missed the one yesterday."

I wanted to rip that smug tug on her lips!

Yet, I couldn’t bring myself to do so. Maybe because deep down, Nayra was still my younger sister. Before I did things I regret, I decided to ignore her and walked closer to the road.

“Elmyra!” Balthar called.

I ignored him and continued my steps. He caught up to me and blocked my path. “Stop acting like this! I can clear my schedule next month and hold a party for his birthday. You don’t need to get this upset!”

Tears fell down my cheeks and that seemed to startle Balthar for a bit. Balto was gone already and he talked about next month for him?!

"Get out of my way!" I went past him.

As I walk, I heard Nayra’s footsteps catching up before apologetically talked to Balthar, "This is my fault, Alpha. I should’ve insisted you to go home despite knowing Balto was just acting sick. I should’ve let go of my ego and let the child to have his moment with you."

I stopped in my track.

That witch… Balto was coughing his lungs out, and she said he was just acting sick?

I let go of my suitcase, turned and hurled up to slap away that smugness glint on her face.

“Ah!”

Balthar instantly turned into rage. He grabbed me by the hand and pushed me away, causing me to fall on my butt.

As he shielded Nayra behind his back, he raised his tone. “What the hell are you doing Elmyra?!”

I could feel my heart was beating faster. My gaze fixed on my trembling palm. I just slapped my sister, and when I looked up to look at her offended and slightly tearful eyes, I felt a sense of relief.

She deserved this!

Standing up, cleaning any dirt on my clothes, I looked up both at Nayra and Balthar. Needless to say he was furious, I could smell the warning scent coming out of him.

I used to be cautious around him, but now. What do I have to fear? Balto… everything had been taken away from me

"You’re uncontrollable, Elmyra! Don’t you realize you’re hurting your sister?" Balthar shouted.

I let his words fell on deaf ears. My own rage still building up inside of me and I couldn’t tear away my glare at Nayra.

"You watch your words, Nayra,” I warned Nayra. “You had no freaking rights to slander my son like that. Our blood ties be damned!"

Nayra held Balthar closer to her, I could sense fear coming out of her voice. "A-alpha Balthar, let’s just drop this matter. If my sister couldn’t admit his son is faking his illness, then let it be. Don’t fight because of me."

“Balto was really ill!” I screamed at the top of my lungs then shifted my gaze to Balthar.

Holding back my tears from overflowing, I asked him with restrained voice. "Balthar, do you really, really, think that Balto wasn’t sick? Didn’t you see how pale he had became in the past few months?"

Balthar’s silence was enough for an answer.

My heart broke once more knowing that he had doubts of Balto’s honesty. My son had a genuine soul. He still had the typical child behavior of wanting attention, but he’d never fake his own illness for that.

Balto was suffering, for more than a year. If only I got a part of Balthar’s influence as an alpha, I would’ve brought Balto abroad if needed. We I exhausted most sources around Night Howl Pack but not yet contacting healers from abroad.

If it weren’t from Balthar’s restriction, I was certain we could’ve created a better treatment for Balto’s condition.

If Balthar had bothered to truly sit down, and truly see what had happened to Balto. How my son’s condition significantly deteroriate within the span of months, Balthar wouldn’t even believe the lies Nayra was feeding him.

Yet, in reality, he did none of those. He didn’t care.

“Right, of course you didn’t notice. You’re too busy with your ‘tight schedule’ to care.” I said between sobbed as I wiped the tears off my face.

I recalled how Balto had insisted that I just stay by his side. He didn’t want to see any more healers or doctors. His voice, frail and trembling, echoed in my mind as he confessed that he might not have much time left. But he also said he was happiest when I was with him, far more than when anyone else was trying to treat him.

At the time, I refused to accept it. I couldn't bear the thought of losing him. But deep down, I knew—his condition wasn’t improving. The remedies I could find were limited, and hope was slipping away faster than I could grasp.

That’s when I made a decision. I left Balto, promising him I wouldn’t be gone long.

I traveled far, seeking out Balthar, who had ignored my mind link more than once. I went straight to his office, fell to my knees, and begged. I swore that if he granted me permission to reach out to doctors abroad, it would be the last favor I’d ever ask of him.

I still remember the flicker of satisfaction in his eyes. It was as if he had been waiting for me to say those words for far too long. His reaction stung, but I pushed the feeling aside—my focus was entirely on saving Balto.

Unfortunately, I was too late. The best healers from abroad could only come the fastest by next week and Balto had died before any of them could treat him.

As my mind returned to reality, I saw Balthar glanced around, a hint of suspicion in his gaze.

“Where is that boy? I don’t sense him anywhere,” he asked, his voice sharp. And then the accusation, “Are you hiding him from me?”

I was stunned, disappointment washing over me.

Why now? Why only after Balto’s death did Balthar care enough to ask?