Chapter 3

That night, I can't sleep.

I lie in the guest room bed and stare at the ceiling. The house is quiet. Too quiet. I keep thinking about Jasper's face. The way he ran from me.

Around nine, I hear footsteps upstairs. Lily's voice. Soft. Then Jasper's laugh.

I get into the wheelchair. Move to the door. Open it slowly.

The hallway is dark. But there's light coming from under Jasper's door upstairs. I can hear them.

I wheel myself to the bottom of the stairs. Sit there. Listen.

"One more chapter," Jasper says. "Please?"

"One more," Lily agrees. "But then it's really bedtime."

He giggles. The sound makes my chest ache.

She starts reading. Her voice is warm. Steady. She does different voices for the characters. Jasper laughs again.

I close my eyes. Press my palm flat against the wall.

This is what six years sounds like. This easy rhythm. This intimacy.

I should go up there. Knock. Say goodnight.

But I can't move.

I sit at the bottom of the stairs until the reading stops. Until I hear Lily say, "Sweet dreams, buddy."

"Love you, Mom," Jasper says.

"Love you too."

The door closes softly. Lily's footsteps move down the hall. Toward the master bedroom.

I wheel myself back to the guest room. Close the door. Sit in the dark.

---

The next afternoon, Lauren comes to visit.

She arrives with flowers. Pink roses. Not my favorites, but close enough.

"Keira!" She hugs me carefully. Like I might break. "You look amazing. I mean, considering everything."

I smile. Try to. "Thanks for coming."

She sits on the edge of the bed. I'm in the wheelchair by the window. She's wearing a nice coat. Expensive. Her hair is different. Shorter.

"So," she says brightly. "How are you feeling? Really?"

"Tired," I say. "But okay."

"That's good. That's really good." She nods too much. "Grayson said you're doing physical therapy. That's great."

"Yeah."

Silence.

She looks around the room. At the bare walls. The single dresser.

"This is cozy," she says.

I don't answer.

She shifts. Crosses her legs. Uncrosses them.

"Lauren," I say quietly. "What was it like? These past six years. Here."

Her smile falters. Just for a second. "Oh, you know. Grayson managed. He's always been good at that."

"And Lily?"

She blinks. "Lily's been helpful. Really helpful. With Jasper and everything."

"She lives here."

"Well, yeah. It made sense. With you in the hospital. Someone had to—" She stops. Clears her throat. "Anyway. You're back now. That's what matters."

"Did you visit?" I ask. "The house. During."

She hesitates. "A few times. For dinner. Grayson likes to host."

"With Lily."

"She's a good cook," Lauren says quickly. She laughs. It sounds forced. "Better than you, honestly. Remember that Thanksgiving turkey?"

I stare at her.

She checks her watch. "Oh wow. I didn't realize the time. I have a thing at four."

"You just got here."

"I know. I'm sorry. But I'll come back soon. I promise." She stands. Smooths her coat. "It's really good to see you, Keira. Really."

She hugs me again. Briefly. Then she's gone.

I sit by the window and watch her car pull away.

She didn't tell me anything.

But she told me everything.

---

Grayson says we should have a family dinner.

"All of us," he says. "Together. It'll be good for Jasper. Help him adjust."

I don't want to. But I nod.

Lily cooks. She moves around the kitchen like she owns it. She knows where everything is. The plates. The glasses. The serving spoons.

I sit at the table and watch.

Jasper is in the living room. Playing with toy cars. He hasn't looked at me once.

Grayson sets the table. He puts me at one end. Lily at the other. Jasper between them.

Lily brings the food out. Roasted chicken. Vegetables. Rice.

And shrimp.

I stare at the platter. My chest tightens.

Jasper loved shrimp. When he was two. I used to make it for him special.

"Looks great," Grayson says.

We sit. Lily serves Jasper first. Chicken. Rice. Vegetables.

No shrimp.

I reach for the platter. Put two shrimp on my plate. Then I put two on Jasper's.

"For you, sweetie," I say. I try to smile.

Jasper looks down at his plate. Then at Lily.

Lily's face goes pale.

"Keira," she says quickly. "He can't—"

Jasper picks up a shrimp. Bites it.

Ten seconds.

Then his face starts to change. Red blotches spread across his cheeks. His neck.

He drops the shrimp. Starts scratching his arms.

"I'm itchy," he says. His voice is high. Scared.

Lily is already moving. She runs to the kitchen. Comes back with a small case. Pulls out a needle.

"It's okay, baby," she says. Her voice is calm. Steady. "Just a little poke."

She jabs the needle into his thigh. He cries out.

Grayson is standing now. He's staring at me.

"You didn't think to ask?" His voice is sharp. Angry. "He's allergic, Keira. Severely allergic."

"I didn't know," I whisper. "He used to love—"

"That was six years ago!"

Jasper is sobbing now. Lily pulls him into her lap. Rocks him.

"She tried to hurt me," Jasper cries. "She tried to hurt me!"

"No, baby, no," Lily says softly. "It was an accident. She didn't know."

But Jasper won't stop crying. He buries his face in her shoulder.

Grayson sits back down. Runs his hands through his hair.

I sit at the table. My hands are shaking.

No one looks at me.

Lily carries Jasper out of the room. His sobs fade down the hallway.

Grayson stands. Starts clearing the plates.

"I'm sorry," I say. My voice breaks. "I didn't know."

He doesn't answer.

I wheel myself back to the guest room.

Close the door.

Sit in the dark.

My son thinks I tried to hurt him.

And I can't even tell him he's wrong.

Chapter 4

The next morning, I find Grayson in the kitchen. He's making coffee. The machine hisses and drips. He's already dressed. Suit. Tie. He looks like he's going to a meeting.

"Can we talk?" I ask.

He glances at me. Nods. Pours his coffee. Doesn't offer me any.

I wheel closer to the table. My hands are in my lap. I practiced this last night. What to say. How to say it.

"I want to be more involved," I say. "With Jasper. I could do school drop-offs. Or pick-ups. Or help with dinner. Bedtime. Anything."

Grayson leans against the counter. Sips his coffee. His face is calm. Neutral.

"Keira," he says gently. "I understand. I do. But Jasper needs stability right now."

"I'm his mother."

"I know. And we'll get there. But sudden changes—" He pauses. Chooses his words carefully. "They could be hard on him. He's still adjusting to you being here."

"He won't adjust if I'm not around."

"You are around. You're here. That's a start." He sets his mug down. Crosses his arms. "We just need to take it slow. For his sake."

His voice is so reasonable. So measured. Like he's explaining a business strategy.

"What about bedtime?" I ask. "I could read to him. Just one night."

Grayson hesitates. "Lily has a routine with him. If we disrupt that—"

"I'm not asking to disrupt anything. I just want to see my son."

"You do see him. At dinner. In the mornings."

"He won't look at me."

Grayson sighs. Rubs the back of his neck. "This is hard on everyone, Keira. We're all doing our best."

I stare at him. He doesn't say Lily's name. He doesn't have to.

She handles all of that.

"Okay," I say quietly. "I understand."

He smiles. Just a little. Relief. "Good. I knew you would."

He picks up his mug. Checks his watch. "I've got to head out. I'll see you tonight."

He leaves.

I sit in the kitchen. Alone. The coffee machine drips. I don't move.

---

That night, I can't sleep again.

I lie in the guest room bed and listen to the house. Footsteps upstairs. Water running. A door closing.

Around eleven, I need water.

I get into the wheelchair. Move quietly down the hallway. Toward the kitchen.

Then I hear voices.

I stop.

They're in the living room. Grayson and Lily. Talking low. They think I'm asleep.

I wheel closer. Stay in the dark hallway. Just outside the doorway.

"How long are we talking?" Lily asks. Her voice is soft. Careful.

"Six months," Grayson says. "Maybe less. I just need to wait until she's more stable. It would look bad otherwise."

"Of course," Lily says. "I understand."

"Filing for divorce while she's still in a wheelchair—" He exhales. "People would talk. Marcus already made a comment at the office. I can't afford that kind of optics right now."

"You don't have to explain," Lily says. "I'm not going anywhere."

There's a pause. Then the sound of fabric shifting. Like someone moving closer.

"I just want you to know," Grayson says quietly. "This doesn't change anything. Between us."

"I know," Lily says. Her voice is warm. "There's no rush. We have time."

Another pause.

"Thank you," Grayson says. "For being patient. For understanding."

"Of course," she says again.

I hear the couch creak. Footsteps. They're moving toward the stairs.

I wheel backward. Fast. Back into the hallway. Into the guest room. Close the door.

I sit in the dark.

Six months.

He's waiting six months.

Not because he wants to stay married.

Because it would look bad.

I press my palms against my face. My chest is tight.

I'm not a wife.

I'm a scheduling problem.

---

Two days later, Grayson tells me he's hosting a dinner.

"Colleagues," he says. "Just a small thing. I want to keep up appearances. Show everything's normal."

I don't ask what normal means.

Lily cooks again. She moves through the kitchen like it's hers. Because it is.

Six people come. Marcus Hale and his wife. Two other couples I don't recognize.

They smile at me. Polite. Tight.

"So glad you're recovering," Marcus's wife says. Her voice is high. Fake.

"Thank you," I say.

We sit in the living room. Lily serves appetizers. Grayson pours wine. Everyone talks about work. About vacations. About nothing.

I sit in my wheelchair near the window. No one includes me in the conversation.

Then Lily asks if anyone wants tea.

"I'll help," I say.

Lily glances at Grayson. He nods.

She brings out the teapot. Sets it on the coffee table. I wheel closer.

"I can pour," I say.

Lily hesitates. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

She steps back.

I pick up the teapot. It's heavier than I expected. My hands are shaking. Just a little.

I pour the first cup. It's fine.

I reach for the second cup. Tilt the pot.

My grip slips.

The pot tips. Hot tea spills across the table. Across Marcus's wife's hand.

She screams. Pulls her hand back. Her skin is red. Blistering.

Lily is already moving. She grabs a towel. Wraps it around the woman's hand.

"Ice," she says. Grayson runs to the kitchen.

Marcus stands. He's staring at me. His face is hard.

"This is unacceptable," he says. "This whole situation—"

"It was an accident," Grayson says quickly. He's back with ice. Hands it to Lily.

Marcus shakes his head. "You need to get this under control, Grayson. It's not fair to anyone. Especially not to her." He nods toward his wife.

Grayson laughs. It sounds forced. Nervous. "I know. I know. We're working on it. It's just a transition period. You understand."

Marcus doesn't answer.

The other guests stand. Make excuses. Leave early.

Lily walks them to the door. Apologizes. Her voice is smooth. Gracious.

Grayson stays in the living room. Cleaning up.

I wheel toward the hallway. Toward the guest room.

Then I hear Marcus's voice. Low. From the foyer.

"You need to handle this, Grayson. It's complicated, I get it. But you can't let it affect everything."

"I know," Grayson says quietly. "She's recovering. It's a transition period. I just need a little more time."

He doesn't say my name.

I wheel into the guest room. Close the door.

Sit in the dark.

I'm not a person.

I'm a condition.

A complication.

Something to be managed.

Chapter 5

Sunday morning. Grayson tells me his mother is coming for lunch.

"Just a casual thing," he says. "She's been wanting to see you."

I don't believe him. But I nod.

Sandra Payne arrives at noon. She's wearing a cream sweater and pearls. Her hair is perfect. She always looks like she's going somewhere important.

She walks into the living room. Sees me in the wheelchair by the window.

"Keira," she says. She comes over. Hugs me briefly. Her perfume is strong. Floral. "So glad you're feeling better."

She pulls back before I can say anything.

Then she turns. Walks straight to the kitchen. To Lily.

"Lily, darling," she says warmly. "Do you need help with anything?"

Lily smiles. "I'm almost done. But if you could set the table?"

"Of course."

They move through the kitchen together. Sandra knows where the plates are. The napkins. The serving bowls.

She's been here before. Many times.

I wheel myself to the doorway. Watch them.

"How's Jasper doing with soccer?" Sandra asks. "Grayson said he scored a goal last week."

"Two goals," Lily says. She's smiling. Proud. "He's getting really good."

"I can't wait for the tournament next month. I already marked it on my calendar."

"He'll be so excited you're coming."

Sandra sets the last fork down. Turns. Sees me in the doorway.

"Keira," she says. "Can I get you anything? Water? Tea?"

Her voice is polite. Careful. Like I'm a guest.

"I'm fine," I say.

She nods. Turns back to Lily. "Should we eat in the dining room or outside? The weather's nice."

"Outside, I think," Lily says.

They carry the food out. I follow.

We eat on the back patio. Sandra sits beside Lily. Across from Grayson. I'm at the end of the table.

Jasper sits between Grayson and Lily. He's wearing his soccer jersey. He keeps kicking his feet under the table.

"Grandma, watch this," he says. He makes a kicking motion with his leg.

Sandra laughs. "Very impressive, sweetheart."

She doesn't look at me once during lunch.

After we eat, Sandra and Lily clear the table together. I offer to help.

"No, no," Sandra says quickly. "You rest. We've got it."

I sit on the patio. Alone. Watch them through the glass door. Laughing. Talking.

Sandra leaves an hour later. She hugs Lily at the door. Long. Warm.

Then she turns to me. Pats my shoulder. Once.

"Take care of yourself, Keira," she says.

She doesn't say she'll visit again.

She doesn't have to.

---

That afternoon, I need something to do.

I wheel into the guest room. Open the closet. Look for my old photo albums. The ones I kept before the accident.

The closet is mostly empty. A few of Grayson's old jackets. Some boxes on the floor.

I look up.

There. On the highest shelf. Stacked boxes. Taped shut.

I recognize my handwriting on one of them. *Keira — Photos.*

I stare at the shelf. It's too high. I can't reach it from the wheelchair.

I try anyway. Stretch my arm up. My fingers brush the edge of the bottom box. But I can't get a grip.

I sit back. Stare at the boxes.

My things are still here. Technically.

They're just out of reach.

I wheel out of the room. Find Grayson in his office. He's on his laptop. Typing.

"Can you help me with something?" I ask.

He looks up. "Sure. What do you need?"

"There are boxes on the top shelf in the guest room closet. I want to look through them."

He nods. "Okay. I'll get them down this weekend."

"Can you do it now?"

He glances at his screen. "I'm in the middle of something. It'll just take a minute."

"Please," I say. "It won't take long."

He sighs. Rubs his eyes. "This weekend, Keira. I promise."

I don't argue. I wheel back to the guest room.

Stare at the shelf again.

This weekend.

He won't.

---

That night, I can't sleep again.

I lie in bed. Stare at the ceiling. Think about Sandra. About the way she hugged Lily. About the boxes I can't reach.

Around midnight, I pick up my phone.

Call Davina.

She answers on the third ring. Her voice is groggy but alert.

"Keira? You okay?"

"I'm sorry," I say. "I know it's late."

"It's fine. What's going on?"

I don't know where to start. So I just talk.

I tell her about the irises. About Jasper at the school. About the overheard conversation. About Sandra. About the boxes.

Davina listens. Doesn't interrupt.

When I finish, there's a long silence.

Then she says, quietly: "You already know what this is, Keira. You just haven't let yourself say it out loud yet."

I close my eyes. My throat is tight.

"I know," I whisper.

"So what are you going to do?"

I don't answer.

Because I don't know.

Not yet.

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