2: 2

After my mother said that thing about how I could make do with anything, the table went quiet for a second.

Rain held her chopsticks and said in a small voice, "Milly, maybe I'll just sleep on the couch."

"Why would you sleep on the couch?"

My mother picked the bones out of a piece of fish and set it in Rain's bowl.

"Tomorrow we're taking Adrian to your uncle's place. If you don't sleep well and look tired, they'll think we don't care about him."

Only after that did she turn her eyes to me.

"Go put your bags down first. I'll bring you the folding cot in a bit."

I stood up and dragged my suitcase down the hallway.

I'd walked that hallway for years. First door on the left was my room.

There used to be a faded sticker on the door, one Rain insisted on putting there the year I graduated high school.

She said with that on it, no one would ever mistake which room was mine.

The sticker was gone now.

A pale pink cloth tag hung from the handle, a little rabbit embroidered on it.

I paused at the door before I pushed it open.

A warm yellow night-light was on inside.

The sheets had been changed to a floral print, the curtains swapped for pink and white.

On the desk sat a diffuser, hair clips, and a few bottles of skincare, with Rain's knit cardigan draped over the back of the chair.

Half my old bookshelf was gone. What was left held Rain's photo frames and a few little trinkets.

None of this could have been set up in a single night.

I stood in the doorway, suddenly not knowing where the suitcase should go.

Even the empty spot by the door was taken now, filled with her storage basket.

My suitcase stuck in the doorway, and when I shoved it in it hit the foot of the bed with a dull thud.

I bent down to look for an outlet, and that was when I saw the cardboard box shoved under the bed.

The flaps weren't closed all the way. Half of a small blue-rimmed bowl showed through the gap.

I crouched and pulled the box out.

Inside were the graduation photo I used to keep on the desk, a few old books, and the mug I always used.

The mug was wrapped in old newspaper, the paper already crushed flat.

I picked up the graduation photo.

In it I stood at the school gate, my mother's arm around my shoulders, telling me that no matter how busy work got later, I should remember to come home.

Footsteps came from the hall.

My mother walked in carrying the folding cot, saw me crouched on the floor, and frowned first.

"What are you digging through those for? It's all old stuff. I packed it away so it wouldn't collect dust."

She leaned the cot against the wall and took a thin blanket down from the cabinet.

"You'll sleep here tonight."

I looked at the cot.

The iron frame was folded together, a deep old crease running down the middle of the mattress.

I asked, "When did you change all this?"

My mother glanced at the sheets, following my eyes.

"Changed it a while ago. You barely come home a few times a year. The room's just sitting empty either way."

She shook the thin blanket open, her tone perfectly ordinary.

"Your sister's bringing someone home. We can't let her stay in a room that looks shabby."

Rain stood in the doorway, twisting the hem of her shirt.

"Mom, didn't you tell Milly beforehand?"

My mother looked at her at once. "Tell her what? She's your sister, not an outsider."

Rain lowered her head. "But this is Milly's room."

"Your sister has her own place out of town."

My mother pulled the cot open, and the iron frame snapped into place with a clack.

"She's used to it by now. She's not that delicate."

I didn't say anything.

My phone buzzed in my pocket.

I took it out. A message from my landlady out of town.

"Lease is up at the end of the month. If you're not renewing, I'll list it in the next couple of days."

I stared at that line for a while.

The room smelled of Rain's diffuser, my folding cot leaned against the wall, and the cardboard box still lay open at my feet.

I didn't answer the landlady.

I just put the small blue-rimmed bowl back in the box and covered it again with the crumpled newspaper.

3: 3

The next morning I woke early.

The living room curtains hadn't been drawn all the way, and a line of light slipped through the gap, landing right on the old crease down the middle of the folding cot.

I'd barely turned over all night.

The cot was too narrow. The slightest shift and the metal frame creaked. I was afraid of waking everyone, so I lay flat and stared at the ceiling.

A little after six, I folded the thin blanket and went to put the cot away.

I'd just bent down when the doorbell rang.

My mother poked her head out of the kitchen. "Your aunt, this early?"

She still had the spatula in her hand, and her first glance went to the folding cot beside me.

Her brow pinched.

Before I could get the cot closed, my aunt was already inside.

She came in carrying fruit, smiling. "Well, look at you, up so early."

The next second she saw the folding cot in the living room.

"Why is there still a cot set up in here?"

My mother came right out of the kitchen, wiping her hands.

"There were a lot of people last night. Just threw something together."

My aunt looked at me. "Milly slept out here last night?"

Before I could answer, my mother stepped in.

"She's used to living on her own out there. She's only back a night or two, she can sleep anywhere."

She said it while steering my aunt toward the table.

"The room was just sitting empty anyway, so her sister may as well be comfortable in it. She's been the sensible one since she was little. She doesn't fuss over things like this."

When Rain came out of the room, her hair still wasn't brushed.

She saw my aunt, then saw the cot beside me that hadn't been put away, and her face went red.

"Sis, did you not sleep well last night?"

I bent my head and worked the clasp on the folding cot.

"I'm fine."

Rain pressed her lips together and said quietly, "Maybe I should sleep in the living room tonight."

My mother frowned. "What are you saying, first thing in the morning?"

She cut a glance past Rain.

Adrian had come out from the hallway too, and hearing that, he stopped where he was, looking uncomfortable.

"Is it a bad time, me being here?"

"Not at all."

My mother smiled at once.

"It's your first time here, don't read into it. Her sister isn't back often, she really isn't particular about any of this."

Then she lowered her voice to me. "We're going to your uncle's for dinner today. Don't put that face on."

I looked up at her.

She dropped her voice further.

"Your sister's bringing someone home for the first time. Don't let people think this family can't get along."

The clasp in my hand snapped shut.

The cot finally folded down, leaning against the wall, showing a few stripes worn pale on the frame.

My phone buzzed again.

I opened it. It was the landlady.

"I'm listing it on the site this afternoon. If you want to renew, let me know this morning."

I looked at the message and didn't reply.

Seeing me with the phone in my hand, my mother's frown deepened.

"Did you hear me?"

I closed my hand around the phone.

"I heard you."

Only then did she ease off, taking that as a yes.

My aunt was peeling an orange at the table, and asked in passing, "So how did everyone sleep last night? Rain and Adrian in your sister's room?"

Rain started to answer, but my mother laughed first.

"Her sister's always doting on her. They're sisters, giving up a room for a night, what's the big deal."

She turned to look at me.

That look didn't wait for my answer. It just set the words down in front of me.

"There'll be a lot of people at your uncle's, and plenty of loose tongues."

She gathered the orange peel into a little pile, her voice still light.

"It's Adrian's first time going along. Don't give people something to laugh about."

"When we get to your uncle's, if anyone asks, you go along with what I said. Don't leave your sister with no way to save face."

I asked, "When did I ever say that?"

The smile on my mother's face thinned a little.

"Does something like this really need spelling out? You're the older sister. Isn't looking out for your sister the least you can do?"

Adrian, standing off to the side, finally couldn't hold it in. "So the room was originally the sister's?"

The living room went quiet.

My mother set the peeled orange on a plate, then nudged the plate toward me.

"You explain it to him yourself."

4: 4

After my mother said it, no one in the living room spoke again.

The aunt still had half an orange section pinched between her fingers. Adrian stood at the mouth of the hallway. My sister kept her head down, twisting the cuff of her pajama sleeve.

Everyone was waiting for me to speak.

I looked at the plate of oranges my mother had pushed toward me.

She'd peeled them clean, picking off every bit of the white pith.

The things she'd just said, she'd tidied up the same way, into something presentable.

I didn't take one.

The smile on my mother's face stiffened for a second. She turned to Adrian.

"Don't read too much into it. Milly's used to living on her own out there. When she comes home it's only for a night or two."

Only after she'd said it did she look at me.

"You gave the room to your sister yourself, didn't you, sweetheart?"

I remembered how, when I was little and took a fall, she'd used that same soft voice to help me up.

My sister lifted her head, her eyes a little red. "Mom, stop it."

My mother turned on her at once.

"Stay out of this. Your sister knows better. She knows what today is."

The aunt tried to smooth things over too. "Between sisters, giving up a bed for one night is normal enough."

Adrian took an awkward half-step back.

"Maybe I should just head back today."

"Head back where?"

My mother cut him off immediately, her voice a shade more urgent than before.

"It's the holiday. You're already here. It's your first time visiting. How could we let you feel uncomfortable in our home?"

Then she turned back to me.

This time there was no smile on her face.

"Say something."

I asked, "Say what?"

She dropped her voice. "Just nod. Say Mom wasn't wrong just now."

The living room went quiet again.

The aunt gave a light cough and gathered the orange peels to the edge of the plate.

"Milly, your mother's only thinking of the family. It's Rain's first time bringing someone home. We have to get through it smoothly."

My mother caught the line at once.

"Exactly right."

She looked at me, her voice going soft again.

"Mom isn't taking sides. You're the older sister. Helping your sister save face at a time like this won't cost you a thing."

I could hear the porridge still bubbling in the pot in the kitchen. The folding cot leaned against the wall, its metal frame not locked tight, tilting a little.

My suitcase was still sitting out in the hallway.

My mother stared at me, her eyes sinking, degree by degree.

"Milly, don't make a scene on the holiday."

I looked at her, and I thought again of what she'd said two nights ago. We've saved a spot for you at home.

For that one line I'd switched shifts, taken time off, sat six hours on a bus, and carried back the holiday pie she'd asked for by name.

But there was no spot for me at that table.

And no spot for me in that room.

When I spoke, my voice came out steadier than I'd expected.

"I didn't give it up. You just never saved it for me."

My sister's head snapped up.

Adrian froze too.

The orange slipped from the aunt's fingers and landed on the plate with a soft sound.

My mother's face changed in an instant.

"What nonsense are you talking?"

I didn't say it a second time.

The phone buzzed once in my palm.

The screen lit up. A message from Dawn.

"I'm about to list it on the platform. Are you renewing?"

I opened the chat.

My mother saw the movement and frowned. "You're on your phone at a time like this?"

I didn't look up.

The payment code Dawn had sent last time was still there in our thread.

I opened it and typed in the renewal deposit.

Before confirming the payment, I paused for a second.

That rental was tiny, its window facing the back of someone else's building.

But every time, Dawn would ask me, "Should I keep it for you next month?"

My mother was still talking. "Your sister brings someone home for the first time, and you just have to make everyone look bad, is that it?"

I pressed confirm.

The transfer-successful notice popped up.

I closed the phone in my palm, bent down, and set the folding cot upright against the wall.

The metal frame touched the wall with a faint sound.

I said, "You don't need to make it up for me."

My mother looked at me. "What is that supposed to mean?"

I pushed the handle of my suitcase down.

"I have a place to stay."