Forget what you think you know about love because it is not real. To love you need to take that risk, you need to make that choice to fall. If you do not fall in love and experience that love, then it is not worth taking that risk at all. Falling is easy but love is hard. If love is hard, how easy would it take someone for what they are? To me, near impossible, I want to fall in love but I cannot give someone who I truly am. I would rather deal with my broken bones than a broken heart,

So Isabella loves taking charge, my successful attempts at ignoring her has blown up in my face, she has shown me that she is one over me, if I do not respond to her, she responds to me.

"Why have you been ignoring me, soldier?"

"I...I have been busy."

"Busy slapping your brother against the head busy?"

"No busy with other things busy."

"Like other things like ignoring me busy?"

"I...I did...I just."

She looks at me, tapping her finger on her chin, patiently waiting for me to spit the crap out that is about to come out of my mouth.

"I...I was..."

Just screw this!

I wrap my hand around the nape of her neck and pull her closer to my lips.

"What are you doing soldier?"

"Avoiding your questions Miss Stubborn."

My lips brush against hers, innocent and like a tease but it's not innocence that I want, I want fire and passion. I want to lose myself in her and in this moment. She pulls away, leaving our lips just inches away from touching."

"Soldier," she whispers my name.

"Isabella" I smile, prolonging each letter as if to savor them.

My heart flutters as she clasps her hands on either side of my face. Never before has any woman made me feel so good. I pull her body into mine and cover her mouth in a hungry kiss. As our lips crush together, it feels like I am walking on air, the way her lips fit perfectly with mine. Her mouth is so warm, the caress of her lips is soft, and she tastes better than I can remember. Desire and lust fill me, I open my mouth with a low moan.

"You are forgiven...for now," she whispers in my ear.

"If it was not for your mom standing there I would have definitely dropped those pants this time."

I am shocked to my senses. As I look at the entrance of the lounge, my mother, with the most sinister smile on her face, is standing and watching us.

"MOM! How long have you been standing there?"

"Oh me? I just got here. I wanted to come to check who is at the door."

"It's Isabella, the girl that lives up the mountain."

I know at this point that her curiosity has gotten the most of her, there is no way I can even try to tell her to leave us alone. Definitely not after our little display of affection, thank god Isabella spoke when she did because my hands were very near to start and wonder.

"OH HI, Isabella, I am Denice."

"Hi Denice, it's nice to meet you, soldier here talks a lot of you."

"Soldier?" my mom asks slightly confused.

"Isabella likes calling me soldier mom, I think it is because she has forgotten my name."

"HAHAHA," Isabella burst out laughing. "I still know who you are Clayton Jackson."

"Mmmm you going for the full name, normally I only get called Clayton when I messed something up."

"Well don't think that I have not forgotten you running out on me last night."

My mom sits analyzing the conversation not knowing if she should stay or should she rather go but I am pretty sure she has a good idea what Isabella is referring to. I watch her very carefully as she speaks.

"Sorry Isabella, that was my fault, he had to come to help me with packing up his room. Seeing that he is staying, we had to pack up his old stuff."

"I am sure he will make it up to me, won't you soldier?"

"I...uhm...I...I.." I stuttering like an idiot.

My mother jumps in again and it seems that she has a sneakishly brilliant idea, I just know that I am not going to like it. You never let your mom and your girlfriend talk, there is just something that does not sit well putting them both together. Now if you want all your embarrassing secrets out, you ask my mom and of course old Betty, and believe me, I prefer Betty's secrets and not my mom's

"Isabella," my mom speaks as a wicked smile forms at the corner of her mouth. "Have you seen his photos from the core yet? I see he has been hiding them away from me in his room."

"MOM! What are you scratching for in my stuff?"

"It was just standing there, I could not help myself."

"Just standing there does not mean you must climb into it. I was still checking which photos you can take."

"Well it is too late, I have already decided which ones I want to take."

"Bet it is all the ones I did not want you to have. And I swear if any of them lands up with old Betty!"

"Why Clay, I would never do something to you like that to you or your brother?"

"Yes, mom I believe you just as much as I believe that Matt does not have another girlfriend."

"Oh he does, I saw the two of them yesterday. Well, Betty saw them, not me, but she told me."

"Oh my god, what is wrong with this family. Nevermind us but with Betty?"

"Agh stop being so dramatic soldier, let me see those photos." Isabella excitedly says.

"Scoot up so I can sit next to you." My mom comes to wiggle herself between us as she sits down.

I only but look at the two of them and their eager smiles on their faces. "I am going to regret this"

She starts flipping through the ones they took the day I left to join the core. That was an amazing day, well for me at least, my mom could not stop crying and dad, just could not stop cursing. It was by far the happiest day of my life.

"Ahhh soldier you look so cute," Isabella says as she takes the photo from my mom.

"That is when he still had hair."

"Mom don't you dare!"

"But son, all soldiers lose their hair."

"Yes and not all soldiers like being seen without it!"

And like I can really stop her, she is already flashing the worst possible one she can find in front of Isabella's face were I believe, which other's will argue, is the photo where I almost have no hair at all

"Sorry soldier but that is near damn ugly."

"And there I thought you liked me for who I am and not my looks."

"I am an all looks kind of girl."

I just look at her as I think to myself (Well honey wait until you see my leg then, your all look kind of girl ass is going to be out the door.)

"I think it makes you look like a real man." My mom adds.

"Mom since when does a haircut make a man? I would like to believe I became a real man when I left for the core."

"You are a real man my son, I just wish sometimes that you did not have to grow up so fast."

She starts flipping through the photos again when all of a sudden Isabella shouts.

"STOP! I want to see that one."

Pointing to a photo my mom was just about to pass. A photo that the platoon leader took of me shirtless after a morning jog.

"Damn Denice, you surely know how to make your boys. Just look at those muscles. I am pretty sure you can melt butter on that chest."

"Isabella! You cannot say something like that to my old mother, you will give her a heart attack."

"Believe me heart attack is what I felt the first time that I saw it."

I almost near damn joke at my mother's next words. "Isabella I am sure your fingers can get lost in that curves."

"Mother! It's my stomach you are referring to! Can we please move on!"

Next, we just flip through a whole bunch of them showing me in uniform at base and on deployment. Most of the photos are of me and all my core buddies just messing around with a few serious ones. Until at last the torture is done or so I think...

"Wait!" she stops my mom again. "What is that one?"

(Fuck fuckedy fuck.)

Isabella is pointing to a photo, one of the very last photos that my core buddies took of me. A photo where I am laying in bed where you can see my amputated leg wrapped up in bandage underneath the blankets."

"Shit soldier. Did you get hurt down there?"

I look at my mother that is sitting next to her in absolute horror, the color has drained from my face as I look for the answer in my mother's eyes. She has saved me up until so far, can she save me again. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

"Just a few broken bones, nothing major serious."

"Is that the leg you walk with so funny," she asks. "Did those bones not healed back the way they should of?"

"You know our soldiers, I did not stay off the leg when I was supposed to."

"At least you came back in one piece soldier that is all that matters."

"I guess it is."

"Well, that is enough of that then." My mom says as she gets off the couch. "Can I get you, kids, something from the kitchen?"

"Just a coffee if you making mom. It feels I can do with something strong at the moment."

"That would be nice, a coffee for me too Denice."

Isabella turns to me with that beautiful smile of hers. There is something on her mind, by the look in her deep brown eyes, it must be something important.

"Soldier, I never asked you why you got your bus ticket back home."

Don't just break your walls down to let someone in, make them work for it, make them show that they are worth it. Wait for that one that is willing to climb your walls just to find you that will break them down just to get to you. The one that is looking for you, all that you are in body, mind, and soul. The worst reason to break down your walls is just for the physical, let love in before giving that part that you are not willing to expose.

I have done my very best to ignore Isabella again. It's day count two, I answer her briefly when I think it warrants. Yes, I am the dumb ass that starts it and when it comes to pulling through, I do my famous now you see me and now you don't hear from my act. The damn woman is fine and god knows I want her, not only physically but on a much deeper level than that, I just wish I can get past that part that is in the way...my leg.

I am sitting in the lounge with Matt and his new girlfriend when my phone rings.

It is Isabella.

"Stop ignoring the woman and answer the damn phone," Matt says with a hint of irritation in his voice. "You should have figured by now that she is not going to go away."

"I can't and you know it."

"Bro she likes you for you, not your damn leg."

"Matt! Watch your mouth. She does not know. And anyway she likes the full version of a person that is me, well that she thinks is me."

"Bro, I just wish you will out with it. You know that the old man is going to blow a valve when he finally finds out. I don't think Isabella will even think near the same."

My phone buzzes.

It's Isabella.

"I am starting to feel like a stalker bitch soldier, throw a girl some rope here."

"HAHAHA. Are you drowning girl?"

"Aha, he is alive! You're a sight for sore words. I am missing you over here in my whore house."

"Are you dreaming of spanking again?"

"Only of you my soldier. When am I going to see your sweet ass again, well I still need to see it and oh boy can't I wait to see it, I mean when can a girl see her man?"

"Mmmm your man? Now that I like the sound of. When did I become your man?"

"Since you have been feeding me all those honey kisses which by the way I am out of. I need some more like yesterday already!"

"Hahaha you will give a guy some serious big head here"

"HAHAHA, soldier get your ass here! There is some real head I would like to give you."

"What about me and Matty and his new attachment come for dinner?"

"As long as it brings me you then I am up for it."

"Perfect, this sweet ass will be coming up in an hour."

"I will crack out one of my finest whips just for you."

"Hahaha see you later my boo."

I wish I knew what I am doing, I mean I want to see her, yes, but I know I am going to push her away as soon as it gets too serious, I guess that is why I am taking Matt with. Maybe I should just stick my pride and tell her about it. Let's wait and see what happens tonight."

"Listen here dumb ass," I turn to look at Matt. "Whatever you had planned for this evening has just been canceled."

"Are you throwing me and my girl out the lounge for Isabella for Isabella?"

"No, you and..." I turn to the girl sitting next to Matt. "Sorry girl but I don't think I caught your name."

"It is Chloe."

I turn back to face Matt again. "You and Chloe are coming for dinner at Isabella."

"Are you perhaps trying to not be alone with her?"

"I am trying to avoid a situation where I need to lie to her or push her away again."

"Well," Chloe says. "I need to go home and change then and grab a few bottles of wine. Do you want to come with Matty? My parents aren't at home."

"Fuck girl," Matt excitedly says. "Only if you let me take them off with my teeth this time."

I listen in horror to the words coming out of his mouth. "Fuck man, that is not what I wanted to think about now, I hardly know the girl and now I got an image of her in my head with just her panties on."

"Damn bro, who said I was talking about her panties? You seriously need to get laid."

"Just get your ass out here and be there at seven, I will have your balls to the cat if you are late."

"Yup you need to get laid."

Matt and Chloe are out the door to her place so she can go change while I head upstairs to go do the same. I bump into my mother just as I am about to enter my room.

"Are you guys going over to Isabella tonight?"

"Mom, are you listening to our conversation again?"

"Your dad is annoying me, so I ignore whatever he says."

"Is he commentating on the story he is watching again?"

"I don't know why he watches it if he thinks he knows more than the presenter. It drives the shit out of me."

"I would invite you with to Isabella."

"Please no. I see enough of your brother's face down every girl in town's throat, I don't want to see yours too."

"Mom my face is not going to be down Isabella's throat."

"Oh my son, every time she is going to try touch that leg or talk about the core, it is definitely going to be down her throat."

"Mom I am just not ready yet."

"I understand, I really do. Now go have fun before the old man comes with his shit."

I head into my room and lock the door behind me so that I can change.

It takes me several attempts later and a very chaotic room full of clothes and I am finally ready to head off to Isabella."

I bump into my mom again as I leave through the back door.

"Good luck Clay."

"Thanks, mom, I think we are going to be home quite late, Matt's girl is whipping out the wine."

"Just be careful down here that late at night."

"Will do mom, love you."

I give her a kiss on the cheek and start heading up the road.

With every step that I take, it feels like my heart is getting smaller and smaller from the suffocating feeling I feel surrounding it. What the hell is wrong with me, it's only a girl, a girl I feel that I am about to die over. I have never felt so anxious in my life before, this is a good anxious but also a good scary one. She is worth every scary moment I feel but is she worth letting that wall down tonight.

As I get closer to her house, I see her sitting outside on the deck with a glass of wine in her hand. She is breathtaking, watching her brings a smile to my heart, god I wish, I wish so many things that I would want to do to her. The thing is, I have not even tried being with a woman with my leg like this. I mean, do you take it off or do you leave it on when you do it? And what can I do, is there like only certain positions that we can do, how do you even begin to have sex like this.

I clear my head and make my way up to her.

"Evening Miss Stubborn."

"Evening my soldier."

"You look amazing."

"Not half as amazing as what you make me feel now that I see you."

I take her glass of wine from her hands and put it on the table. I pull her into my embrace and deep into my chest.

"There is that rippled stomach that I have missed." She says as she runs her fingers over every inched of my rippled abs.

"I think you are confusing my muscles with my lips."

"Mmmmm there is that too."

My hands drift to her hips and I pull her closer. Slowly I press my lips against hers. Her plump, velvety lips against my slimmer, warm ones, dancing around and bonding together. My insistent mouth is parting her trembling lips, sending wild tremors through my body, and inflicting sensations I have never known I had. No one has ever kissed me like this, she is waking a feeling and slowly crumbling that wall.

"Mmmmm keep doing that and we sending your brother home."

"Talk about Matt, he is late."

"Early bro." Matt and Chloe come walking out of the house.

"We got here before you." Chloe hands me a glass of wine

"Glad we did cause by the looks of that you would be having each other for dinner," Matt says with a slightly amused smile on his face.

I reach over and slap him behind the head.

"Says Mister Casanova himself. You were probably trying to suck out her third lung inside the kitchen there."

He slaps me behind the head.

"Duh bro, you only have two lungs."

I slap him behind the head.

"I am sure Chloe has none left."

He slaps me behind the head.

"Are you boys going to slap each other the whole night like that?" Isabella asks as she watching the ping pong match of slapping heads. "I can always bring out that whip."

"Boo, I thought you keeping that for us for later? I wink at her and smile.

"Hahaha be careful what you wish for soldier."

Matt goes to feed wood to a big bonfire he is building, while the girls go inside to grab snacks and a full bottle of wine. "Just so you know for you f.y.i this girl is crazy about you bro."

"Why, did she say something?"

"He asked if you did not like her cause you keep pushing her away. Told her she must be patient, the core fucked you up."

"Geez I don't know if I should say thank you, but you right, the core did fuck me up for this woman."

"Bro the worst the girl can do is tell you to fuck off. Now just give her a chance maybe she won't."

"Matt, I hope you are right, she makes me feel things, you know things deep down inside that stir every string of your heart."

"Bro I think you call that being in love."

Just then the girls come back outside, we all cuddle up around the fire. Isabella is sitting on my left-hand side with her fingers interlocked in my hands. Her head is resting on my shoulder, the sweet scent of her almost feel her heart beating through her ears. Her touch and smell is overwhelming every feeling I feel inside. I gently take her hand and lay it on my leg.

"Is this the one that was broken?"

"No this is the better one of them."

"Was it sore?"

"Was what sore?"

"When you broke your leg?"

"Bella, boo, I never had so much pain in my life before, I thought I would die."

"Is that why you don't want to let me touch or talk about it?"

"There is a lot more to that story my boo."

"Are you going to tell me one day or are you going to keep on pushing me away?"

"You know how it is to be with a soldier."

"Yes, maybe I should call you Mr. Stubborn then."

If I have not said this before, I am saying this again. Life is made up of a series of defining moments, most of them determined by you but a few some by others. How I choose next will define what my relationship with Isabella will become.

"So what do you say, soldier? Will you spend the night with me?"

"I...uhm...I..."

She asked me to spend the night, not have sex, it does not mean that if that is the only thing I have on my mind right now that she has. She wants to share a bed with me, to sleep, well that is what I think. What the hell does spend the night mean these days?

"I promise I don't bite, well only if you don't want me too."

"If you allow me to bite back then I will definitely stay with you."

"You can do anything you want to me, soldier."

"You say anything?"

I lean down and softly kiss the tender area at the base of her neck.

"Mmmmm carry on doing that and I am definitely chasing your brother away."

"Can you keep that mouth still for one second so I can kiss those lips?"

"And if I don't?"

"Well, then I am just going to have to pin you down to that chair."

"Start pinning soldier boy because I ain't zipping them."

"Hahaha, I am not that easy my boo."

She leans her head closer to me and her lips meet mine. The touch is passionate and filled with hunger. There is a fire rushing through my veins.

"Mmmm you taste so sweet, I need more of that."

She runs her hand down my chest, tangling her fingers in my shirt's buttons.

"And I need more of this."

"Hahaha, you need more of my clothes?"

She bites at my lower lip.

"I want what is underneath this shirt."

"If you keep on biting like that you might just get it."

"I thought you were going to bite back?."

"Who said I was going to bite your lips."

"Hahaha, are you having dirty thoughts there soldier?"

"I was talking about your neck, what are you thinking about my boo?"

I pull her hair to the side to expose the bare of her neck, gently I lay soft kisses up and down. The fire that is burning between our bodies is twisting and turning, ready to explode."

Just as I start working my way back up to her tender smooth lips, Matt interrupts

"Hey lovebirds, me and Chloe are going to head on out, she is not feeling so well."

"Sure man, let me walk you out." Before he can even protest, I am up and ready to see him at the door.

"Chloe my ass is sick," I just look at him, knowing what stunt he is trying to pull. "Why don't you guys just stay here?"

"So you can have an excuse not to finish what you are starting there."

"I am not starting anything."

"Ya right you are only about to devour her like an animal there."

"She is goddamn gorgeous, how can I not want to."

"Bro don't overthink the shit, just see how far you are willing to take it."

"Hahaha if you see me with a shiner then you know how far it went."

"Hey, she might even surprise you. Now get back there before she gets cold."

"Fuck man, you make her sound like a piece of meat."

"Bro just get your dumb ass back there. I will see you in the morning."

I show both of them out and make my way back to Isabella. That calm carefree me of before is now completely gone, once again I am terrified to be alone with her.

As I turn the corner by the deck, she is sitting there as beautiful as ever.

"Do you want more wine soldier?"

"Please boo, let me go grab a full bottle."

I make my way to the kitchen, I know what I am doing and I better stop it, it is not like I can come to the kitchen every half hour now can I. Trust me I swear I will find something else to do. Maybe I should just go home. Second thought, maybe she does not want more and I am just overthinking shit as Matt said.

I get a bottle of red from the counter and make my way back to the deck. Before I sit down again, I pour us both a full glass.

"Shame I hope Chloe feels alright."

"Com one boo, do you really think she is sick? As far as I know, her parents are away for the weekend."

"Hahaha look at me being a dumb bimbo."

"Hahaha, you said that not me."

"Hey, you better watch out soldier."

"Or what?."

She puts her glass down on the table, my body freezes.

"Or this."

Our lips crash together like colliding stars. Everything around us fades away, the only thing that exists is the passion and the spark between us. My hand moves to the back of her head and my fingers tangle in her thick brown hair, pulling her even closer. I press my tongue to the seam of her lips and delve inside her mouth.

"Mmmm you have never kissed me like this before." She says as a small moan escapes from her lips.

"Do you want me to stop?"

She does not answer, she goes to work at the buttons of my shirt. Undoing them slowly, one by one, until she has me fully exposed. Her hands work their way around my body, feeling each crevasse, each line along my perfect chest. She runs her hand down to the lining of my denim and slides it between the fabric and my skin. My entire body stiffens.

"I..I...hold that thought, I need to go to the bathroom."

"Fuck soldier, you have the worst timing in the world."

I rush off my chair and go to the bathroom. Fuck! What is wrong with me, I have the most gorgeous woman in the world all over me and I keep on running away.

I drop my pants to the floor and sit on the side of the bath. I need to see how bad my leg is still bruised from the other day and if I want her to see it. I relax my leg and press the depress release button on the top part of my prosthesis. Gently and slowly I move the prosthesis just a little from the remaining part of my leg and release the button. I proceed to slowly pull the prosthetic socket from my leg. The bruising has gone down a bit but do I still want her to see it.

I put my leg back on and join up with her at the deck again.

"I almost thought you went all missing on me there again soldier."

"Hahaha, you missing me that much already."

"Come here so I can show you how much I have really missed you."

She pulls my closer by my belt and presses her lips against my rippled stomach. I gasp and a deep moan escapes my lips.

"Mmmm that feels amazing boo."

She runs her hand over the bulge that is forming in my pants.

"Oh god, Isabella!"

Is the only words I can get out before she massages me in the palm of her hand.

"Fück Isabella."

She continues to rub my ever so growing erection. I am throbbing and ready to explode.

"Boo if you keep doing that then I am going to explode."

"But that is the whole point soldier."

"Fuck I don't even think I will last for a minute."

How do I give her what she wants without having to bare myself nude in front of her, I am not ready, not today, maybe tomorrow or the day after but not today?

I lift her up from the chair around the waist and slide her ass onto the cold table. She screams at the touch. "Damn that is freezing. I knew I should not have worn a skirt."

"But then I could not have done this."

I slide my hand up her thighs and knot my fingers in the elastic of her panties. I slowly start pulling them down her legs.

"What are you doing soldier,"

"Sshh. Do you want me to stop?"

"Mmmm please don't."

She raises her knees as I pull her panties over and toss them to the side.

She works at the buckle of my pants but I push her body down onto the table and pin her down by her hands. I look at her half-naked body that is glowing in the light of the moon. I have not had a woman for as long as I can remember and I want her now.

"Isabella, I want you, I don't think I can keep it in anymore."

"Soldier, I have wanted you since the very first day we met."

"Fuck boo."

I start to unbuckle my belt and drop my pants just enough not to see my prosthetic leg.

Then before I know-how, our naked skin is moving softly together and I am inside of her. She arches her back, I grab her by the waist and I plunge into her. She screams and grabs the edges of the table. I slow down and our tongues entwine in a kiss. In seconds I am thrusting and fucking her again.

"Ohhh soldier that feels so good."

"Do you want me to go faster boo?"

"Mmmm yes go faster."

She gyrates in slow insistent circles, I rock with every thrust. Our bodies are bucking and arching and colliding in almost perfect rhythm.

"Fuk Isabella you feel so good."

"Mmmm go harder soldier."

I keep up the rhythm relentlessly. With each stroke, I slide my hot throbbing flesh completely into her. I drive in deeper, with each thrust increasing pace.

"Boo I am not going to last for much longer."

I can no longer resist the increasing pressure. It's hard to hold back, to make the moment last. I am so caught between the intoxication of the climax and extending a moment, I never want it to end.

I let out a deep growl as I find my release. With one final thrust, my body shudders, and I explode inside of her. In that split second every nerve in my body is electrified.

My body falls down panting until we both catch our breaths

Once I have regained my balance, I quickly pull up my pants before she gets off the table.

Wow, soldier where did you learn that?"

"Hahaha, definitely not at the Corps."

"Did not take you for the table kind of guy."

"Hey a man had to improvise, did not think I would make it to the bedroom."

"Hahaha, we are going to have to go to the bedroom sooner or later."

And that poses a whole new problem. I cannot sleep with my prosthesis. I might have avoided the sex part but how do I get past this one.