On the year my parents passed away, my mother's best friend, whom I called Auntie, took me into her house.

She cared for me with meticulous tenderness, supported me and gave me a love that I had never known before.

As a young boy who had just fallen in love, I made a secret vow that I would marry my aunt when I grew up.

However, on the day of my coming-of-age ceremony, when I finally took the opportunity to confess my love to her, she was furious!

She deemed my love a violation of moral principles. It violated the rules of ethics and decency.

From that moment on, she grew colder and more distant from me. She even agreed to a business marriage with the Lombart Family, just to shatter my hope completely.

I was so heartbroken and gave up my dream. I boarded a cargo ship bound for distant seas, determined never to look back.

However, Auntie cried hysterically and begged me to look at her again.

***

"Harry, when you're going on the voyage three days from now, take me with you.”

The bleak autumn wind chilled me to the bone as I stood on the seagull-filled shore when I typed out the message.

When I hit send, a sense of relief finally came over me.

Finally, I could let go of this forbidden love and made the decision to leave.

Not a second passed by after I sent the message and Harry called me.

"Joey Caplan, are you joking?" Harry Robinson's voice boomed from the receiver, "Do you realize what you’re saying? This voyage will take you away from your home country for ten years, maybe even a lifetime! Are you ready to live adrift forever?”

“I can’t allow it. If you leave, how am I supposed to explain it to President Morris?”

Harry was the captain in charge of my company's overseas shipping operations.

The President Morris he was talking about was my Auntie, the same woman who had raised me for ten years and was also the company's CEO.

I had expected his reluctance. I even prepared my excuse.

"Harry, this isn't a decision I made on a whim," I told him. “You know I’ve loved my Auntie for years. It’s caused nothing but trouble for her. If I leave, it will be better for everyone.”

“Besides, if you don’t take me, I’ll find another ship or leave the country on my own. You can’t stop me," I threatened.

Harry went silent for a long time. Then his voice sounded on the other side of the phone. With a weary sigh, he finally relented. "Fine! At least if you come with me, I can keep an eye on you. You’ve been through enough already, losing your parents so young. Pack your things. We’ll leave in three days.”

After Harry hung up the phone, I stared at my phone's lock screen, lost in thought.

It was a photo of my Auntie and me. In the picture, my nineteen-year-old Auntie looked dazzling, even when she was as a roadside barbecue stand.

She was standing tiptoed with mischievous look on her face as she tried to pour beer into my cup. Meanwhile, a nine of year old me was trying desperately to stop her. We both had scratches on our face. Behind us, people were watching our antics on the background with smile in their faces.

That was the moment that I would always remember.

Back then, I was still in elementary school. I was teased mercilessly for being an orphan. One day, the taunts escalated into a fight and the other kid’s parents humiliated and even hit me.

When Auntie found out, she stormed into the school without hesitation and avenged me on the spot.

As I recalled the memory now, the emotion that I had managed to let go almost resurfaced. So, I diverted my attention and texted my aunt.

"Auntie, the day after tomorrow will be your twenty ninth birthday. I want to cook for you personally. Is that okay?"

I stared at the chat screen as the words "typing ..." appeared, only to vanish moments later.

It took a long time before I got a cold and polite reply from my Auntie.

"Joey, I hope you understand. Even if we’re not related by blood, it will never happen between us.”

"I'm your Auntie, your mother’s best friend. Before she passed away, she entrusted you to my care. I raised you,” she wrote.

"Let go of these unrealistic thoughts. If this is another attempt to confess your feelings, I must decline and refuse your invitation," she had typed.

I actually was not surprised by her rejection.

Ever since I was head over heels with my Auntie at nine years old, I kept professing my love to her and because I was a child at that time, she would scold me and call me a silly kid who didn’t know better.

I naively believed that once I grew up, I could be with her. Each year on my birthday, I eagerly declared my feelings once again.

However, over time her rebuttal became lesser and lesser. Then on the day, I came of age, her attitude toward me changed completely. She became cold and unyielding.

This time, however, I truly just wanted to celebrate her birthday. Couldn't she know that after more than ten years, I finally called her "Auntie" again, just like before?

I just shook my head and replied, "Yes, Auntie, I understand. Don’t worry. I really just want to celebrate your birthday this time. I promise."

She started typing ... then stopped. After what felt like an eternity, she finally replied with a cold "Hmm."

I let out a wry laugh and decided not to press further.

This would be the last time I celebrated her birthday. The last chance to repay her kindness.

***

When I got home, Auntie was not back yet. I glanced at the clock in the living room, it was already eleven thirty at night and she never stayed out this late before.

I recalled that when I was still a child, I was afraid of the dark. As soon as Auntie knew about it, she would go home to accompany me, no matter how busy the company was. She even turned down meetings for me.

However, once she learned about my feelings, she started avoiding me. Her eyes grew distant and stranger when she looked at me.

The toys that she once brought for me from every business trip stopped appearing, The bedtime story and chatting before bed were all gone. She started coming home later and later.

Now she played the role of a polite but detached elder, her words filled with artificial warmth and long-standing insincerity.

At half past twelve, my Auntie finally showed up in a drunken state. However, when I opened the door to greet her, I saw her leaning on a tall man. Her cheeks were flushed and she rested her small face against his chest.

Pain stabbed my heart. The ache spread in my heart.

This was the scene I had feared most, which was Auntie becoming someone else’s woman. It was the reason I could not let go of my feelings, why I confessed to her year after year.

However, my fear became a reality in front of my eyes. So, I just lowered my head and did not say anything.

Half-drunk, Auntie pushed me away with a look of irritation. "Joey? Didn’t I tell you not to wait up for me? I don’t need you taking care of me anymore."

With that, she grabbed the man’s arm and headed upstairs to the second floor. The place where I had not set foot since I grew up.

I stood there, rooted to the spot while watching them as my heart sank even deeper. I knew what would happen once they reached the second floor.

The thought of it and the pain that followed shattered the emotional barriers I had tried so hard to maintain. With a clenched fist, I mustered all my courage and pleaded desperately, "Auntie! Please, don't …."

She paused for a moment, her steps faltering. However, then, with the man’s support, she continued upstairs.

The man glanced back at me, a faint smirk tugging at his lips.

It was like the damage had already been done. It was an irreversible reality.

That night I could not sleep and just sat in the living room while listening to the muffled, ambiguous sounds from the second floor. The lights in their room flickered on and off, each change like a stab to my chest.

I clenched my teeth to stifle the sobs threatening to escape, and in my head, I kept chanting, "Haven't you let go already? You know perfectly well this is not possible. Your feeling for Auntie is doomed not to happen."

Yet no matter what tears kept flooding.

It was not until I heard footsteps descending the stairs that I realized dawn had arrived. Hastily, I wiped my face, erasing the traces of my anguish.

It was Auntie who walked downstairs. Her freshly washed hair cascaded over her shoulders and she carried herself with an elegance that seemed to exude a newfound confidence. A woman who had just had her first taste of intimacy.

My chest tightened further.

She glanced at me briefly, her expression cold and distant, as if I were a stranger. She did not even utter a word to me.

Panic welled within me and I couldn’t stop myself from calling out loudly at her back, "Auntie!"

She knitted her brows with annoyance. "What is it?"

Her voice was unfamiliar, icy enough to freeze the air around her. For a moment, I was speechless.

Yet, it was precisely her detached demeanor that snapped me back to reason. Forcing a smile, I said, "Auntie, I just wanted to ask, what would you like to eat for your birthday tomorrow?"

Perhaps relieved that I wasn’t uttering forbidden words, her tone softened slightly, "Do whatever you want. I'm heading off to work now."

Then she left and the house went empty again.

Before I could leave, the man from last night strolled down from the second floor, still in a bathrobe. He smiled casually at me and said, "I’ve heard a lot about you from your Auntie. You’re Joey, right? I’m her fiancé. You should call me Uncle-in-law."

He gave a sly smirk before continuing, "I hear you’re a taxidermist. It's quite a rare profession in the country. What a coincidence, so am I."

I barely registered his words. My gaze was locked on the vivid marks on his

A surge of grief and anger welled up inside me. I did not want to have anything to do with him, so I turned around to leave.

However, he grabbed my arm and pulled me back. "What's wrong? Joey, my nephew, aren't you going to greet your uncle?"

While saying that, he leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Everyone in Mirage City knows you’re in love with your Auntie. Do you think it’s some big secret?"

"Let me tell you something. While Leslie agreed to our family’s alliance, she wasn’t planning to fully commit to me yesterday."

"Do you want to know how I changed her mind? I told her that if she didn’t comply, I’d leak to the media that her precious nephew was hopelessly in love with her. Let’s see how the public reacts to such a scandal."

"You … despicable!" I said and turned to glare at him. My hands clenched tightly.

The realization that Auntie had been coerced into submission cut me like a blade.

"Despicable?" He sneered, "Joey, you’ve got it wrong. I’m not the one who fell in love with the aunt who raised me. That’s all you. In fact, I’m helping you, aren’t I?"

He laughed mockingly and poked my chest with his finger.

The fury in my chest erupted. Out of control, I grabbed him by the collar and dragged him toward the backyard pool. Then I slammed him to the ground. My fist was ready to pound his smug face.

Ye, he just smiled calmly at me.