Chapter 5

When Eloise opened her eyes again, she was greeted by the white ceiling of the hospital. The sky outside was as dark as ink.

At her bedside was Jonathan, the faint shadow of his stubble covering the lower half of his face. He looked worn out, but his eyes lit up when he saw that Eloise was awake. It was as if life had been poured back into him.

"Ellie, are you thirsty? Would you like some water?" This concerned man was miles apart from the one who had forced Eloise to get on her knees earlier.

Eloise sported a bandage around her head, and her lips were badly chapped. She was too weak to speak, and only managed a soft, "Get out." However, her voice was barely more than a whisper, and Jonathan didn't hear her.

It took her a moment to finally raise her voice, albeit not by much. "Get out. I don't want to see you."

Jonathan's hand shook while holding the glass. He recalled feeling as if a part of his heart had been hollowed out when he went out of the hospital room to go after Eloise earlier, only to see her delicate frame lying on the floor.

When he scooped her into his arms, fresh blood had flowed from the gash on her head down his arm and wrist. He'd nearly lost his footing. "I'm not going anywhere until you recover."

Jonathan brought the chicken noodle soup over to the bed. Taking a spoonful and blowing on it to cool it off, he brought the spoon to Eloise's mouth. "There are too many things for me to explain, but I hope you'll understand that I'm your biggest defender."

Eloise's face was practically ashen. Her thick lashes fluttered as she let out something of a laugh. It sounded weak but sarcastic. "But can I count on you, Jonathan?"

Jonathan wanted to say yes on instinct, but when he saw the subtle, cynical curve to her lips, an inexplicable rush of fear and panic gripped him. He was reminded of the way she told him she didn't want him anymore. His heart tightened, and he suddenly pulled her into his arms.

Resting his chin atop her head, he murmured, "Don't blame me for this, Ellie. Your parents have always played favorites. They were so angry when they found out you hired someone to run Sonia over that they said they wanted to kill you.

"They'd find ways to get back at you if they didn't hear you apologize. I can't always be there to protect you, so I had to force you—"

"So, in short, I still can't count on you to protect me." Eloise gently wiggled out of Jonathan's embrace, though a bitter smile still played on her lips. No one, other than Marie, had loved and cherished Eloise since young. "Get out. I want to rest."

"Okay." Jonathan decided to let her have some time alone to cool off. When he reached the door, he glanced over his shoulder at her. "Ellie, we'll get married after you recover. I don't know how long we'll have as husband and wife, but I won't marry anyone but you."

Eloise curled up under the blanket and said nothing.

She wouldn't be dying. She wasn't marrying him, either. She would hold on to the memories they shared, but forget about ever loving him. He'd just become someone she used to know.

For the next few days, Jonathan guarded Eloise's bedside faithfully. He'd sleep on the chair when he was tired or occasionally doze off on the bench outside the room. He'd show up if Eloise so much as coughed, as if she were the most important person in his life.

The day Eloise was discharged from the hospital finally arrived. It was also her birthday.

Jonathan brought her on a luxury cruise, and only then did she know he was throwing an elaborate cruise party in her honor.

Upon arriving at the party, Eloise and Jonathan were met with envious looks from the scions of the upper-crust society. They sang praises of Eloise and Jonathan, making the former sound like an angel who fell from heaven.

But the moment Jonathan left Eloise's side, the same scions who had lauded Eloise with praise immediately turned against her. Their words took a vicious turn, too.

"Jonathan's probably toying with Eloise. Did she think he'd marry her just because she took care of him for five years? Please. Sonia is his true love."

"Yeah, and he even risked his life to protect Sonia when they got into that accident years ago. It's obvious he's deeply in love with her."

"If Jonathan had to marry someone, he'd pick Sonia without a doubt. The Jensens love her more, too. They even gave her their entire fortune. Shows how much more important she is to them than their biological daughter."

"Hey, you guys know Eloise was only 18 when Jonathan first woke up from his vegetative state, right? She was so pure and naive when she moved in with him. Do you reckon he's slept with her already?"

"I bet he did. Any man would jump at the chance to ride a little slice like Eloise."

The few scions huddled together as they chortled over their crude jokes, but their laughter ground to a halt when Jonathan slowly entered the hall with Sonia.

Sonia's arm was looped through Jonathan's, and she wore a pristine, white gown, clinging to him like a sweet, helpless young lady. A gentle smile played on her lips. She was like a princess who welcomed the people's reverence.

As Sonia stopped before Eloise, she handed Eloise a small box. "Eloise, this is the present I picked out for you."

Eloise opened the box to find a broken crown nestled within. Snorts and sniggers immediately sounded around her.

"I got the gift on short notice. I hope you don't mind." Sonia blushed and quickly closed the box. "It's all Jonathan's fault for overreacting. He said I was too weak to go gift-shopping alone, so he had his assistant do the job for me. The assistant should have been more careful with it."

Jonathan's brows furrowed as he lovingly flicked the tip of Sonia's nose. "I wasn't overreacting. You need to take better care of yourself."

There was no hiding the affection in his tone.

The guests around them began to quip, "Still hung up on Ms. Jensen, huh, Mr. Sheffield?"

"If you care about her so much, why don't you get back together with her? Today's a good day for reconciliation. Come on, give us something to cheer about!"

A smile tugged on Jonathan's lips, but perhaps Eloise's presence beside him prompted him to stop the crowd's jesting. "Ellie, don't take their words personally."

Eloise didn't, and she'd stopped caring about Jonathan, too.

During the cake-cutting ceremony, Eloise had just picked up the knife and was about to make the first cut when Sonia asked sweetly, "Jon, can I have the first slice?"

It was customary for Eloise to make the first cut and eat the first slice, considering it was her birthday.

"If my parents hadn't stopped me all those years ago, I would be the one by your side. But I know there's no chance of us getting back together.

"Eloise is your fiancee now, and it's your job to look after her." Sonia dried her tears as a quiet sob escaped her. "But I really want to have the first slice of cake, and I want you to cut it for me. Think of it as a closure for the years we spent together. Let's get married in the next life, okay?"

No one thought Sonia was wrong for making such remarks. Some of the guests even spoke up for her.

Hope glittered in Jonathan's dark eyes. He glanced at Eloise. "Ellie, this is Sonia's only wish. Let her have this moment, okay?"

Eloise stared at the scene before her. She found this entire birthday party to be a farce, and she was the biggest joke.

Chapter 6

Since returning to the Jensen family, Eloise had deferred to Sonia more times than she could count. But this time, Eloise wasn't so much compromising as she was letting go of what she no longer wanted.

She set the cake knife down and turned to leave.

Jonathan gripped her hand and pulled her to a stop. "What are you doing? Where are you going? I threw this party for you, and you choose to throw a hissy fit now?

"What is it that you want? If you want the first cut that badly, you can have it. I'll talk to Sonia about this. I'm sure she'll understand."

Eloise found it odd, as that cutting the birthday cake was her right, seeing as it was her birthday party. Yet Jonathan made it sound like Sonia had granted her that honor.

"No need." Eloise smacked Jonathan's hand away and left, looking as if she'd made her resolve.

Jonathan instinctively made to chase after Eloise, but Sonia suddenly put her hands to her chest, looking pained. "Jon, my heart hurts. Am I dying?"

He immediately stopped and pivoted to scoop Sonia into his arms. "Don't worry, you'll be just fine. You won't die."

That was a given, seeing as Sonia was only faking. Deep down, she didn't think Eloise was a match for her at all.

Meanwhile, Eloise stood on the deck and leaned against the rail, letting the sea breeze whip her face. The cruise was steering back the way it came, and it was evening when Sonia suddenly appeared.

"You look like you're enjoying yourself. I told Jon I'd come and comfort you, but he told me you were still angry. He was worried you'd give me a hard time. But surprisingly, you don't look sad at all."

Eloise was determined to ignore Sonia. In truth, she'd fantasized about becoming as close as sisters with Sonia when she first returned to the Jensen family. But Sonia was promiscuous and once even tossed one of her condoms into Eloise's backpack to frame her.

After that, Eloise stopped hoping that she and Sonia would ever get along.

When Eloise didn't respond, a cold gleam flashed in Sonia's eyes. "Do you know what I hate most about you? You always act like you're better than me. What's with that holier-than-thou attitude anyway?

"Let me tell you a secret. After you collapsed in the hospital, the doctor didn't just carry out any ordinary bloodwork for you, but tested your blood for its compatibility with mine. Why did you think Jon guarded your bedside so faithfully? He doesn't love you. He was just worried you'd become suspicious!"

Although Eloise had already decided to give up on Jonathan, her heart still cracked when she heard the cold, hard truth. As it turned out, Jonathan hadn't stayed with her out of guilt, nor was he trying to make it up to her. It was because she carried the heart that could save Sonia, his first love.

Eloise mocked herself for being so stupid and naive. To think she'd been somewhat touched by Jonathan's gesture while he was guarding her bedside.

Just then, Sonia drew closer to Eloise, who stepped back and demanded warily, "What are you doing?"

"Jonathan can't choose between us, Eloise, and that pisses me off. I'm going to force him to make a choice!" With that, Sonia suddenly clutched Eloise's arm and tugged her forward.

There was a loud splash as they both fell into the water.

However, Sonia probably never thought Eloise would be an amazing swimmer. It didn't take long for Eloise to break the surface and wipe the water off her face. She then began to swim toward Sonia.

Fear belatedly struck Sonia. She made to swim away, but it was too late.

Eloise gripped her hair from behind and pulled, then shoved Sonia into the sea. Panic seized Sonia, but she had barely taken more than a few breaths before Eloise pinned her under the water again, not at all letting her speak.

"You haven't stopped picking on me since I returned to the Jensen family, Sonia! Who gave you the right? You accused me of stealing what was yours, but when did I ever do that?"

Not once had Eloise fought with Sonia over their parents' love or Jonathan's affection. "I'll make you pay for the suffering you put me through all these years!"

Eloise repeatedly pulled Sonia up by her hair, only to pin her underwater again. After several rounds, Eloise's rage finally ebbed.

She waited until Sonia had no fight left in her before gripping the rope dangling off the side of the liner. She hauled herself aboard with Sonia in tow, but the moment Eloise climbed onto the deck, someone slapped her hard across the face.

It was the first time Jonathan had hit her, and in front of a crowd, no less.

Chapter 7

Eloise couldn't remember how she got off the cruise or how she found her way back to her apartment.

All she remembered was Jonathan's hand striking her across the face and the deafening laughter that had ensued around her afterward. The guests had spat abuse at her, calling her a shameless whore and a homewrecker who failed.

She was then "accidentally" jostled and pushed by the crowd. Each time they shoved her around like they were passing a ball, she could hear men and women alike laughing at her. The noises eventually formed a tidal wave and crashed over her, threatening to pull her into the rowdy undertow.

As for her so-called fiance? He carried his half-drowned first love and walked away without so much as a backward glance at Eloise, even though she'd gotten hurt on her birthday.

Eloise thought she'd never shed a tear for Jonathan again, but traitorous tears cascaded endlessly down her face nonetheless. When she returned home, she soaked herself in the tub.

Meanwhile, Jonathan and Sonia had made it into that evening's list of trending topics on social media. Someone had posted the footage of Jonathan cradling Sonia while seeking medical help for her, and the netizens lauded them with blessings.

It wasn't long before someone dug out Jonathan and Sonia's history.

Everyone soon found out that Jonathan and Sonia were heirs to prestigious families. They were practically a power couple. Their relationship was an example of refined and materialistic perfection, a pair who had grown from childhood friends to sweethearts.

Even the story of how Jonathan had risked his life to save Sonia was included. No one could come close to beating such a flawless match. It didn't take long for the netizens to become fans of this pairing.

Eloise, whose face had been blurred in the footage, was always the forgotten one.

Sonia posted on her Instagram, too. "Of all the fields we've played, we're still each other's endgame."

Accompanying that caption was a picture of Sonia getting an IV drip while Jonathan fussed over her. In the picture, Jonathan had a bleeding cut on his finger, presumably from peeling fruits.

Eloise double-tapped on Sonia's post, then unfollowed the latter. She also unfollowed Jonathan, Helena, David, and the sycophantic scions on her list.

When Eloise's body was feeling much better after a long soak in the tub, she rose and put on her clothes. After that, she began to plan her future. She decided she'd travel around the world for a year once her love for Jonathan had been erased. To do so, she'd have to sort out her business in advance.

It was already dark outside by the time she was done planning.

At that moment, Marie called. "Hello, darling. The surgery's tomorrow. Will you be able to make it, or shall I reschedule your session?"

"It's alright, Grandma. I've already bought the plane tickets."

The love-erasure surgery had yet to officially launch in the medical industry, and the ones presiding over Eloise's surgery were elites in the medical research world. Their time was precious, and she didn't want their trips to be wasted.

Having hung up, Eloise dropped by the house she and Jonathan used to live in. It had been a while since anyone occupied the property, which explained the overgrown plants and grass in the yard.

Eloise walked about 15 steps along the pebbled path before stopping at the second evergreen tree. She dug up a little box and opened it. A pretend marriage certificate lay within, and written on it were her and Jonathan's names.

"Ellie, what does it mean to be married?" Jonathan had asked her once.

"It probably means that we'll get to sleep together, eat together, live together, and never be apart when we grow up. We'll be closer than anyone else we know," Eloise had answered.

"I don't ever want to be apart from you. Must we wait until we grow up to get married? I want us to be married now."

"No, I can't marry you now. If I do, you'll be committing a crime."

"How do we make it not a crime, then?" Jonathan pressed earnestly.

"I think you might get away with it in the olden days."

That year, Jonathan had the mental capacity of a seven-year-old, but he pored over various books and tried to understand the complex sentences in them. He then mimicked those in the olden days and painstakingly penned a "marriage certificate".

At the time, Jonathan had loved Eloise boldly and unreservedly. He once told her, "We'll spend forever together, Ellie."

There was once when Marie came by to take Eloise away. Jonathan had chased after their car through half the city barefoot, leaving bloody footprints in his wake. He'd nearly lost his life as he clutched the marriage certificate and cried out Eloise's name hysterically.

That day, Eloise caved and got out of the car.

But now, the man who vowed to protect her forever had shoved her aside and hurt her until she was barely whole. Eloise's heart grew colder and colder, and she didn't even realize she was crying until her tears splattered on the back of her hand.

She forcefully tore the marriage certificate into shreds, then tossed those pieces into the air along with the scattered moments of her past.

"I will love you forever, Ellie. No one will pick on you on my watch!"

"Ellie, I'll behave from now on. Don't get on your knees anymore, okay?"

"Ellie, I'm better now. I'll protect you for the rest of your life."

"You know I can't just watch Sonia die."

"What the hell are you playing at, Eloise?"

"Why couldn't you have just drowned at sea, Eloise?"

Eloise had stuck by Jonathan's side for five years, yet she was still no match for Sonia.

Lost in the Pause

Chapter 5
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