Letting Go of Me Is Your Greatest Mistake in Life

My daughter called Hudson for help.

"Mommy is about to die. Daddy, please come save her," she said.

Hudson answered the phone impatiently.

"You're just like your mom. Both of you are liars. If she's going to die, let her die sooner," he said.

Hudson didn't know that I was dying.

Later, just as he wished, I never bothered him again. Hudson ended up kneeling at my grave, begging for my forgiveness.

*****

I slumped by the bedside. Blood kept gushing from my mouth. I couldn't stop it.

My three-year-old daughter cried as she wiped my mouth over and over with tissues.

"Mommy, what's wrong? I'm scared," she said.

I wanted to reach out and hug her, but I couldn't muster the strength.

"Mommy, I will go find Daddy. I will get Daddy to save you, okay?" she said.

Leah ran barefoot to the living room to get the phone.

She finally got the phone, but couldn't unlock it.

"Mommy, I can't unlock the phone. I can't call Daddy. Can you help me unlock it?" she said.

Leah pushed the phone into my hand. I lifted my hand with difficulty and slowly entered the password.

Leah saw the phone unlock and quickly called Hudson.

I had taught Leah how to call Hudson before. She found Hudson's number right away and dialed it.

The phone rang for a long time before he answered.

"Hailey, didn't I tell you not to bother me if it's nothing important? I'm very busy," Hudson said impatiently.

Hudson's impatient voice came through the phone. Leah was startled.

Leah glanced at me, too weak to get up. She spoke timidly into the phone.

"Daddy, Mommy is sick. Can you come save her?" she asked.

Hudson was stunned when he heard Leah's voice. Then he sneered.

"Hailey, you've outdone yourself. You're using Leah now. How dare you?" he said mockingly.

Hearing Hudson's mocking words, I felt like a boulder was crushing my chest. I spat out another mouthful of blood. My vision started to blur.

Leah didn't understand what Hudson was saying. She just kept crying.

"Daddy, Mommy is going to die. Please come save her, okay?" she pleaded.

Hudson was completely enraged on the other end of the line.

"You're just like your mom. Both of you are liars. If she's going to die, let her die sooner," he said.

As Hudson finished speaking and was about to hang up, a clear, childish voice came from his end.

"Daddy, hurry up and cut the cake. It's almost midnight," the child said.

Hudson lowered his voice. He spoke gently to the child.

"Alright, I'm coming now," he said.

The last bit of hope in my heart finally disappeared.

So, he was celebrating his dream girl's birthday. No wonder he was angry that Leah and I interrupted him.

Leah stared at the disconnected call, feeling helpless.

I wanted to lift my hand and pat her little head to tell her it was okay, but I had no strength left.

My consciousness slowly faded. My past flashed before my eyes like film strips.

I thought, "I'm going to die."

It had only been two months since my cancer diagnosis. My life had just begun, and now it was ending.