The next morning, Lauren and I go out to pick up our maid of honor dresses. Since Alice doesn’t have a sister, she chose us both to stand up with her. Her brother will be Ryan’s best man alongside Chad.

Lauren and I picked two simple, but incredibly beautiful, silk olive green dresses. After the ceremony at the church, we’ll go back to our family ranch where the reception is being held. I wasn’t so sure about it at first, but now I can see it’s actually a good idea. I know every single shortcut in there, and if I want to—or need to—I can hide or escape to the house in no time.

“Aren’t you glad Alice picked a color that looks good on both of us?” Lauren asks, admiring herself in the mirror while we do our final fitting to make sure there isn’t anything to be sewed or fixed before we take them home.

I admire myself too, seeing the fabric hold my curves in the right places. I do look nice in it. My chestnut-brown hair doesn’t stand out as much as Lauren’s, but I like the way it accentuates my fair skin and the freckles on my nose—which I’m actually fond of.

I ignore the way my brain reminds me of how much Spencer used to love my freckles too and nod at Lauren. “Yeah, green suits us.”

I can see Lauren’s eyes darting from my face to the floor and back to me, as if she wants to say something but is not sure if she should. She has a good heart and is compassionate. She’s a good sister to me. We’ve always been close, and I trust her with all my heart, even if sometimes she can be super nosy.

However, I can tell she’s genuinely worried about me, so I take a deep breath and decide to address this in a serious way for once.

“I am okay, pony.” That’s what I’ve called her ever since she was three and begged Dad to get her a pony for her birthday. It began as teasing, but eventually, it became a thing between us, and she started calling me that too. Now, it’s just a loving nickname we use with each other. “Really.”

“I know you are! It’s just that…” She sighs, turning to look at me face-to-face instead of through the mirror. “I remember how this was a terrible period for you, and I don’t want to see you go down that hole again.”

I smile fondly at her, grabbing her hands and squeezing them. “Look, I know you’re all worried about me, and I do appreciate it. But I’m stronger now. I won’t let him get to me. And I promise you that, if I feel somewhat sad or uncomfortable, you’ll be the first to know, okay?”

“Okay…” Lauren finally seems convinced, and I drop my shoulders. “It’s a promise. You tell me, and I’ll punch Spencer in the face and take you away from the party, hear me?”

I chuckle, nodding at her. “Poppy said she’d do the same thing.”

“Poppy knows the deal,” Lauren adds with a shrug, turning her attention back to her reflection in the mirror. “I love you, pony. And you can count on me any time. You know that.”

I smile at her, ignoring the sudden lump forming in my throat. Lauren and I don’t normally show affection toward each other, rather choosing to show our love through bickering and teasing, but I know she loves me and will do anything to see me happy. Just as I am there for her no matter what. Knowing I have Poppy and Lauren on my side is enough for me to put my fears and insecurities behind me and focus on the day ahead.

This is an important moment for my brother and my family, and a guy shouldn’t be able to ruin this for me. So, with this renewed determination in mind, I take off my dress and head back home with my sister so we can start getting ready.

The ranch is pure chaos by the time we return, and after checking if anyone needs my assistance, I go to my bedroom to take a shower and get my hair and makeup done. Lauren rushes to her old room, saying she’ll meet me when she needs help with her eyeliner—something she can’t get right no matter how many video tutorials she watches.

Thankfully, I’m skilled at that.

It takes us three hours to be completely ready and waiting by the front door.

“We’re going to be late,” Dad complains, waiting by his truck with the driver’s door open. “Just get in and let’s go!” He slides behind the steering wheel, and I climb onto the back seat.

“Where’s Chad?” Lauren asks, following me while staring back at the house, searching for our brother.

“He’s picking Ryan up, remember?” I answer as we watch Mom walk out of the house looking like a Hollywood queen.

She gets inside the car. When Dad kisses her in front of us, Lauren and I fake vomiting, and after that, we finally head out.

People say that weddings make us emotional and thoughtful, and well, they aren’t lying about that. It’s inevitable to imagine certain scenarios when you cross those beautiful old wooden doors and spot the colorful glass windows around, the painted ceilings, and the majestic and ethereal architecture of the church.

I would be lying if I said I never imagined being the one walking down this aisle. I lost count of how many times in the past I pictured my wedding day with Spencer. I don’t regret that. I was too in love, completely infatuated by him, so I really thought we would one day be husband and wife.

But life had other plans for us.

As Mom and Dad walk to the back of the church to meet Father Joseph, Lauren and I head toward Chad, Ryan, and Poppy, who are gathered in a corner, talking enthusiastically.

“Hey, guys. What’s up?” Lauren greets them as soon as we approach them.

“Everything all right?” I ask, taking in their faces.

“Yep,” Chad replies with a grin. “Just giving Ryan the last chance to run away from this. I can distract Mom and Dad, and you can distract Alice.”

I throw my hands up, smiling at them. “Don’t count on me for that, bro. Alice can be really scary when she wants to be.”

“You’re not wrong about that,” Ryan muses in a low voice. He seems a bit nervous, fidgeting with his fingers.

I look around, making sure no one is close enough to hear us, and stare back at him. “You’re sure about this? It would be okay if you aren’t,” I say softly.

Chad and Lauren nod eagerly. Poppy remains quiet, and I know that even though she’s known my family since forever, she doesn’t feel like this is a conversation she should be part of.

Ryan kindly smiles at me, and warmth spreads through my heart as I realize this is it. My oldest brother is getting married and starting his own family. This gives me a bitter feeling, knowing life will be somewhat different now. I always struggle with changes. Ryan doesn’t live at the house anymore, so it’s not like it will be a drastic change, but still… The realization that he will have his own family now weighs on me.

“I’m sure of it. Alice is the love of my life, and I can’t wait to marry her,” he replies. “Thank you for being so supportive, though. All of you,” he adds, glancing at our siblings. “It means a lot to know I’ll have you all by my side no matter what.”

“Of course, man. That’s what we’re here for,” Chad remarks cheerfully, patting Ryan on the shoulder. “Just don’t show up at my place when Alice sends you to sleep on the couch. I might have someone over.”

“Ew, Chad. You should man up and stop being such a playboy,” Lauren complains, rolling her eyes like she’s repulsed. She lowers her voice. “No one will ever want to marry you when you have your dick inside a different woman every night.”

Chad seems offended for a moment, but then widens his grin, turning to Poppy. “Poppy would marry me, wouldn’t you?”

She chuckles, unbothered by his flirtation. “Of course. In your dreams I would.”

I cover my mouth with my hand, preventing a loud laugh from coming out. Chad’s expression is priceless, and we all have to do our best not to make a scene inside the church.

Our bonding moment is soon interrupted when Mom and Dad rush us to the entrance so the ceremony can start. I notice immediately that Spencer isn’t around. I’m starting to wonder if he decided not to come. It can’t be a comfortable thing for him to do either.

As I walk down the aisle to get to my maid of honor position by the altar, I spot Spencer’s sister, Aubrie, with her husband and daughter, and I briefly nod at them. They have always been nice to me, and there’s no reason for me to be anything but kind to them. They didn’t break my heart and throw the pieces to the wind like Spencer did.

By the time Alice shows up, looking divine in her white perfect princess wedding dress, my brain gives me a break and forgets about Spencer. For a moment, all I can pay attention to is this beautiful bride walking toward her husband-to-be, looking as happy as I’ve ever seen her, the future ahead of them so uncertain, but at the same time, so secure.

If the expression on my brother’s face is any indication of how much he loves her, I believe they will be fine.

But then, something shifts my focus. In my peripheral vision, I can see someone sneaking in through the side door, walking toward one of the last pews as careful and silent as a person could ever be.

And I make the mistake of turning my head to see who it is.

My heart immediately begins to race as I spot those piercing blue eyes I used to love so much. It’s been seven years since I last saw him, but he’s only gotten better. More handsome, more muscular, more… perfect.

Shit.

Of course, Spencer would get better with time. At seventeen, he was already considered a freaking supermodel. His athletically built body is even bigger now, more muscular and toned. I can tell even with all the layers of his suit covering it. His chiseled jawline is as sharp as ever. He now has a bit of stubble covering it, making him look more mature and grown up than I remember him ever being.

I don’t remember ever seeing Spencer in a suit before, or maybe I did. At his parents’ funeral, perhaps? But in that situation, I was definitely not in the mood to notice how handsome he was in one. His dark hair is a bit longer too, a bit messy but still presentable, as if he’s trying to be both professional and casual at the same time.

And there it is, his dimpled smile.

God, how can one man be this perfect?

I hate that he’s gotten more handsome with time.

Spencer sits on the pew, being cautious not to make any noise or disrupt anyone else watching, and that’s when I notice it—the woman coming in behind him and sitting by his side, her dazzling smile blinding me.

Spencer brought someone. A woman. To my brother’s wedding.

I feel this rage boiling inside me, even though I have no idea why this bothers me so much.

Maybe because he should have been more thoughtful than to bring a date to his ex-girlfriend’s brother’s wedding?

Perhaps he doesn’t care about me enough to think I would care that he brought someone else. It’s been seven years, after all. I shouldn’t be mad or annoyed by it. But for some reason beyond my comprehension, I am.

I shake my head discreetly, trying to divert my attention back to the ceremony taking place in front of me.

My gaze meets Chad’s from across the altar, and by the way he’s looking at me, his brows slightly creased, I can tell he also spotted his friend walking in. And he also noticed my reaction. I really hope I didn’t make it too obvious. The last thing I need right now is to prove them all right. I said I’d be fine, and I intend to be exactly that.

I just need a bit of champagne to help me.

For the rest of the ceremony, I do my best not to take my eyes off the couple getting married. I can feel my palms sweating as I hold Alice’s bouquet, but I don’t dare make a move. I almost let out a sigh of relief when we’re finally allowed to walk out of the church. As soon as I’m free of my maid of honor duties, I rush toward Dad’s truck, praying that I don’t bump into anyone on the way.

I just need to get to the reception. I’m not someone who usually drowns herself in alcohol to forget a problem, but tonight I will be.

There’s no way I can get through this evening sober. Not if it means I might have to talk to Spencer and be introduced to his girlfriend. Or wife.

Oh, God!

She can’t be his wife, right? Chad would’ve mentioned it to me if his best friend—my ex-boyfriend—had gotten married. He’d have gone to the wedding himself.

Unless Spencer eloped. But that doesn’t sound like something he would do. But again, what do I know about him? I’m a completely different person now. He might be as well.

I’m overthinking it, I know. I’m cursing myself as to how easily I’m influenced by his presence. In the end, I’ve ended up doing exactly what I was afraid I’d do—freaking out about Spencer.

“Girl, it looks like you’ve seen a ghost,” Poppy notes as she walks toward me. I’m leaning against Dad’s truck, waiting for them to stop greeting the guests so we can drive home for the reception.

“I kind of did, didn’t I?” I mumble in a low voice.

“I’m so sorry, girl. I know this must be really hard for you,” she says sympathetically, squeezing my arm.

“How are you doing, pony? The nerve of this guy to bring a date.” Lauren shows up, the frown on her face warming my heart. It makes me feel really good to know I have them backing me up.

“I mean, it’s been several years right? He wouldn’t expect me to be annoyed by him bringing a date to my brother’s wedding.” I’m trying to convince myself of that, but it helps to know my sister feels the same way I do.

“Whatever. He should be more considerate,” she adds with a grimace.

“I agree. But hey…” Poppy turns to face me completely, grabbing me by the shoulders and forcing me to look at her. “Tonight is about your brother and your family. Screw Spencer and his Gigi Hadid-wannabe girlfriend. We’re going to celebrate and drink our faces off.”

I chuckle, grateful for them. “Thanks, guys. It means a lot to me that you're all so supportive and not thinking I’m being a bitch about this.”

“Are you kidding?” Lauren widens her eyes at me as if everything I’ve just said is utter nonsense. “You’re not being a bitch about anything, and you’re entitled to feel the way you’re feeling.”

Lauren can be so mature sometimes it astonishes me. She’s always been the goofy, social butterfly in the family—alongside Chad—but it still impresses me when she has these moments of wisdom and maturity. I should be the one being mature about it all, but well, I guess I’m not.

Mom and Dad finally appear, and we get to the party before Ryan and Alice finish taking photos outside of the church. Needless to say, the first thing I do when I walk inside is grab a glass of champagne. The ranch is starting to get filled with people quickly, so I try my best to keep myself occupied, greeting family members I haven’t seen in ages and engaging in conversation with some old friends.

Either it’s the champagne or the atmosphere around me, but I manage to relax and enjoy the party. The music also helps a lot, and I dance until my feet start to hurt. At this point, I’m already drunk. Not out of my mind, or unable to stand upright, but slightly happy and giddy.

“I think I need to pee,” I say to no one in particular since the music is really loud and Lauren, Poppy, and a few of my cousins aren’t really paying attention to me.

“What?” Lauren asks, not looking at me but tilting her head to the side so she is nearer.

“I am going to the bathroom!” I yell close to her ear.

“All right, do you need me to go with you?” She turns to face me, her brows raised while she waits for my answer.

I shake my head, dismissing her with my hands. “Of course not. I’ll be right back.”

Lauren nods, returning her attention to the waiter passing by with a tray filled with glasses of champagne. I ponder grabbing another one, but my bladder is hurting at this point, so I turn on my heel, heading to the closest bathroom.

Thankfully, it’s unoccupied. By the time I leave and stop in front of the sink to wash my hands, I’m a bit surprised at my reflection in the mirror. My hair is a little sweaty and messy, not to mention that the hairstyle I put together for the ceremony is far gone by now. My makeup was worth every penny because it’s still intact. But for some reason I can’t point out—maybe it’s something in my eyes that looks a bit glassy and distant—I look like shit.

I shake my head, slapping my cheeks lightly to shove some sense of reality back into my brain. I would try washing my face with cold water, but that’d ruin my makeup for good, and I’m not ready to go to bed yet. So, after straightening my dress, fixing my hair, and applying some lipstick, I feel ready to return to the party.

But when I decide to take a shortcut through the back door into the kitchen, I encounter the only person I have been avoiding the entire night.

Spencer Bailey.