Leonard Burton and I are childhood sweethearts, bound by a family-arranged marriage.

After we marry, we live a loving, harmonious life. In a terrible accident, he even gives up his only chance at survival to save me.

After Leonard's death, we find a journal among his belongings.

In it, he records the three years he was missing after falling off a cliff—years spent with another woman he deeply loved.

But his parents had forcibly separated them and arranged our marriage instead.

Unbeknownst to anyone, he had continued to protect that woman from afar, silently and faithfully.

At the funeral, Leonard's mother, Charlotte Newman, is inconsolable. "Leonard, it's all my fault. Would you still be alive if I'd let you marry Yelena back then?"

His father, Samuel Burton, glares at me with hatred. "He fell off that cliff saving you. He died in that crash shielding you. Why do you bring him nothing but harm? Why aren't you the one who's dead?"

Yes, why is it not me who's dead?

I look at Leonard's familiar, smiling face on his gravestone before running at it and smashing my head on it.

When I open my eyes again, I'm taken back to when he just returned from that small fishing village.

This time, I choose to let him go and give him what he wants.

Finally, I see Leonard again.

"Miss, aren't you leaving?" the butler reminded me gently from behind.

Taking a deep breath, I forced a polite smile and approached Leonard Burton slowly.

I was dreading every step I took as scenes from my past life flashed before my eyes.

He had pushed me out of harm's way just before the accident happened. His diary had been full of his yearning for Yelena Lynch, the name he had murmured in his dream subconsciously.

"Leonard," I called out softly.

He turned around and seemed to be in a trance. The next instant, he flashed a polite yet distant smile.

"It's been a while," he said.

I noticed the seashell bracelet on his right wrist at this moment. It shimmered under the sunlight.

It had been a gift from Yelena. I hadn't noticed it in my past life, but my eyes hurt just from looking at it now.

"You…" I opened my mouth but was at a loss for words.

"The doctor said I haven't regained my memory completely." He massaged his temples. "I'm still confused about many things."

I stared at his slightly weary expression and suddenly thought of the words he had written in his diary in my previous life.

"Whenever I saw Lena picking seashells at the beach, I always thought that was the most beautiful sight in the world."

As it turned out, someone else had caught Leonard's attention, though he used to be in love with me.

…

The next morning, Leonard's mother, Charlotte Newman, gathered everyone in the family to discuss the wedding.

I sat beside Leonard and watched him absent-mindedly flip through the wedding proposal while circling his finger on the paper.

"Leonard, what do you think about this venue?" Charlotte asked.

He looked up and seemed baffled for a second. "It… It's pretty good."

I realized then that he had occasionally been looking out the window, where there was a garden with fully bloomed roses growing.

In the past, I would've thought he was simply enjoying the scenery. But now, I knew that he was thinking about the hillside covered with wild flowers in the fishing village.

"I think the rose garden is pretty good," I said softly. "Let's hold our wedding there."

He immediately turned around and looked at me. A hint of surprise flitted across his gaze.

I flashed him a gentle smile in response, but I was bleeding inside.

I had booked a flight ticket to travel abroad on the day of the wedding. In my past life, I had dreamed of traveling the world, but I couldn't do it because of various reasons.

Leonard eventually found time to go with me but had been in a car accident and sacrificed his life to save me.

This wedding would be my last gift to him.

"Leonard, take Liv to try on the gowns," ordered Samuel Burton, Leonard's father. "Pick them out on your own. We'll leave this to you guys."

Leonard stood up and offered a hand to me. I stared at his slender fingers and thought of how he had described his yearning for another woman in his diary with these exact hands.

"I'll always remember the sight of Lena standing at the pier. The sea breeze lifted the hem of her floral dress as she wept uncontrollably.

"Sometimes, when I look at the person next to me, I wonder if my life now would be different if I hadn't lost my memory or hadn't met Lena."

These words were like knives stabbing into my heart, and I was bleeding from the gaping wounds.

"Sure." I smiled sweetly and held his arm.

I could feel how stiff his body was, but I pretended not to notice anything.

I provided an address after getting into the car. It was the most high-end bridal shop in the city. I had tried on the gowns there in my past life for a whole day, believing that I was the happiest bride in the world.

"I heard that there are some new designs at the shop. Let's have a look." I tilted my head and looked at him. "Leonard, what's your preferred style?"

He gripped the steering wheel slightly tighter. "Anything you like," he said simply.

I held back my tears and turned to look out the window.

I wouldn't marry Leonard in this life.

During the gown fitting, another woman happened to be trying on gowns too.

She wore a simple mermaid tail gown that accentuated her curvy figure.

Her gaze fell upon Leonard for a brief moment when we entered. Then, she greeted me warmly.

"What a coincidence! Are you guys here for a gown fitting too?" She was quick to get comfortable with us and came closer. "I'm Yelena Lynch. I'm getting married next month."

I sized the woman up. She had a pair of expressive eyes that curled up slightly when she smiled, and she looked alluring.

I wondered why I hadn't noticed the feelings she harbored in the way she looked at Leonard in my past life.

"Yeah," I replied with a smile. "I'm Olivia Smith. This is my fiancé, Leonard Burton."

Yelena cast her gaze upon Leonard again and stared at him slightly longer than before.

Leonard, on the other hand, stood to the side and seemed to be in a trance.

"My fiancé treats me really well." Yelena couldn't stop talking as she tugged at me.

"He remembered the first time we met and would send me white roses every month. Just last week I mentioned that I wanted to eat the cake from a bakery on the east side of the city, and he deliberately traveled all the way after getting off work to buy it."

I noticed Leonard's fingers curling up slightly. I knew him well enough to know that happened whenever he got emotional.

In my past life, I had thought he was nervous because of our wedding. Now, I finally understood that he was merely suppressing his jealousy.

"What about you?" Leonard suddenly asked, his voice slightly hoarse. "Do you love him?"

Yelena was stunned. The smile on her face froze for a moment.

She subconsciously looked at Leonard, and a panicked look flashed across her eyes.

"O-Of course," she replied as she feigned a look of calmness, but her fingers couldn't help grabbing the hem of her dress.

Leonard scoffed, his gaze sharp.

I stood to the side and pretended to look composed as I watched the scene unfold.

How foolish I had been in my past life to not notice something happening between them.

After I tried on the gowns, Leonard left in a hurry after saying that something urgent had come up at the office.

I made an excuse to go to the restroom, but I followed him behind secretly.

In the parking lot, I saw Leonard pinning Yelena against the wall and kissing her forcefully.

Initially, Yelena tried to push him away, but she soon slumped in his embrace.

"It's obvious that you don't love him." Leonard sounded like he was suppressing his anger. "Why are you marrying him?"

Yelena choked up as she questioned, "What about you? Aren't you getting married too?"

"That's different…" Leonard lowered his volume. Then, the two started kissing again.

It felt like someone was clutching my heart. It was so painful that I was suffocating.

I stumbled backward and leaned against the cold wall. Tears kept rolling down uncontrollably.

I recalled a certain event that happened when I was five years old. It had been Leonard's first time visiting my house.

He was clad in a dashing suit. Acting like an adult, he held my hand and said cutely, "You're beautiful. I want to marry you in the future."

At that time, he didn't even know what a marriage of convenience was. He had simply adored me.

He had even gone around the city in search of a hair accessory I liked.

There was a time when I had my eyes on a crystal hair clip. He had immediately gone around the city with his chauffeur to look for the same one. In the end, he had found it in a store in a secluded area. His leather shoes had been torn from all the walking too.

When I was sick and had a fever, he would sneak into my room and stay by my side all day and night.

The adults had caught him once, but he declared righteously, "I want to take care of my future wife!"

Samuel had burned with fury because of that.

Leonard would also prepare surprises with all his heart for every occasion.

When I was ten, he had made me a music box himself with our photo in it for Christmas. A beautiful tune would be played when I wound it up.

He had told me to keep it safe, for it was a token of our love.

Leonard had even planted a weeping willow tree in my backyard on my 16th birthday, saying he wanted to hold our wedding under that very tree.

At that time, he only had eyes for me, and I mistakenly thought it would remain that way forever.

After returning home, I burned everything that held our memories.

I stood in the backyard and stared at the weeping willow tree that had grown so tall. I then retrieved the gasoline cans and poured the liquid at the tree's base.

The scorching flames cast a red hue on my face.

All the promises and precious memories of our youth would be burned to ashes by this raging fire.

Then, I decisively threw the music box into the fire and watched as it melted slowly.

Those gifts holding all the memories I had once treasured were thrown into the flames, one after another.

Finally, I removed my engagement ring from my finger. The diamond glistened in my hands. The glint it reflected was as cold as Leonard's gaze the last time he looked at me.

I tossed it into the fire without hesitation and watched the fire engulf it.

The fire died down gradually, leaving behind only ashes on the ground.

I stood amidst the remains, and I had never felt this relieved before.

Those memories and our agonizing past that used to haunt me had all but vanished in this fire.

The preparation for the wedding was in full swing.

Since the preparation required a lot of manpower and resources, they hired many people.

Yelena happened to be one of them. Leonard was shocked to see her.

I stood in the hallway on the second floor and witnessed the scene in the lobby.

Yelena wore a simple white dress with her hair cascading down her shoulders. She was busy filling in the employment form.

Leonard paused for a bit when he walked past her.

"This is the new assistant wedding planner, Ms. Yelena Lynch," the human resource manager introduced.

Yelena raised her head and looked Leonard in the eyes.

I saw Leonard's fingers tremble slightly. He usually did that out of habit when he was emotional.

"Welcome." Leonard's voice was slightly husky. He swiftly left after that.

I secretly trailed behind him and saw him enter the utility room.

After a while, Yelena entered the room too.

I stood at the door and heard the muffled sounds of sobbing coming from inside.

"Why… Why do you have to do this to me?" It was Yelena's voice.

"Lena, I…" Leonard sounded miserable. "I'm sorry."

I pushed open the door and saw Leonard holding Yelena tightly in his arms.

Their lips were crimson and swollen. Anyone could tell that they had just kissed passionately.

This scene stabbed into my heart like a knife to butter.

I thought I was numb to it all, but the pain was still excruciating.

The next day, Yelena "accidentally" lost the lucky charm that I treasured most.

It was a pendant I loved. When I had fallen sick, Leonard had climbed more than 3,000 steps to get it from the church atop a mountain.

I remembered him departing at 4:00 am that day.

At the time, I had laid in bed with a high fever. While I was floating in and out of consciousness, I heard him sneaking out quietly.

I had only heard the knocking on the door at midnight after sleeping for a day.

He had returned—drenched in sweat. The fabric around his knees had even been ripped to shreds.

He knelt next to my bed and took out a wooden box, saying, "Liv, I've brought you a lucky charm."

I opened my eyes weakly and saw the smile on his pale face.

His hands had been scraped, and his knees were covered in blood.

"I heard that we could make any wish come true in this church if we're sincere enough." He wiped the sweat from his forehead. "I crawled up the steps on my hands and knees. My wish will come true if I show more sincerity, right?"

I couldn't help tearing up when I saw his tired yet gentle gaze.

He gently wiped my tears away. "Don't cry. You'll be fine. I've made a wish to God. I'll offer my health in exchange for yours."

I held the lucky charm tightly and felt the warmth deep within.

At that moment, I had truly believed that the lucky charm would keep me safe.

After that, I had recovered fully.

However, Leonard had started falling sick frequently after the incident. He had always brushed it off with a smile, saying, "It seems like God heard my wish."

I now closed my eyes and seemed to see the young man kneeling on the steps of the mountain.

He had ascended the steps sincerely. He didn't give up even when his knees and palms were injured.

He had truly loved me back then.

Now, Yelena had lost the lucky charm that held that beautiful memory.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Smith!" Yelena apologized in a panic, her eyes red. "I… I'll look for it right now!"

I sneered inwardly as I watched her lousy act.

She had obviously done this on purpose. I had noticed her jealous gaze on the lucky charm on the day she came for the work interview.

Leonard stood to the side with a frown. "How could you be so careless?" He sounded like he was reprimanding her, but I knew he didn't care about the lost lucky charm.

"Forget it. Just let it be," I said softly.

Leonard was stunned as though he hadn't expected this calm reaction from me.

He opened his mouth and wanted to say something. But in the end, he only said, "I'll get you another one someday."

I looked at him without a hint of emotion in my gaze. Instead, I was overwhelmed with fatigue and relief.

At this moment, I had to admit that the guy who would crawl up 3,000 steps, stay up all night when I was sick, and search around the city for a hairclip I liked, was gone forever.

"It's okay." I turned around and left. "Some things are just meant to be gone."

Yelena's sobbing came from behind me. Leonard wanted to say something to me, but he ran after her in the end.

I stood in front of the window and watched the two run out of the villa.

The sun was so bright, but I was trapped in the dark.