Married for five years, I'm known as the woman with the perfect husband. Alexander Foster is tall, strong, endlessly passionate, and people love to joke that we can't keep our hands off each other.

Then he goes on a mission one day and never returns.

I fall apart. I try to end my life six times, and six times someone drags me back.

On the night of the sixth attempt, I overhear my mother-in-law, Anna Greyson, whispering to the man everyone believes is Alexander's younger brother, Daniel Foster.

"Alexander, how long are you going to keep hiding this? Mia has tried to kill herself six times because of you."

Alexander's voice stays calm. "Mom, before Daniel died, he asked me to take care of Lily. She's fragile, and now she's pregnant with my child. If she learns the truth, she won't survive it."

And that's when the truth hits me.

My husband isn't dead at all. He's been pretending to be his own younger brother and plans to have a child with Lily Harper under that lie.

After crying until I can barely stand, I contact Margaret Warren at the matchmaking agency.

"About that blind date you mentioned. I'll take it. And I want the wedding as soon as possible."

"That's wonderful news. Mr. Gaslow has been fond of you for years. If you agree to marry him, he’ll be so overjoyed he probably won't sleep tonight."

Margaret Warren beamed at me. I nodded quietly, saying nothing. My eyes drifted to the stark scars circling my wrist, each one a reminder of how many times I had tried to die. The feeling inside me was impossible to name.

Margaret mistook my silence as hesitation. She squeezed my hand and spoke with earnest patience.

"Mia, the dead cannot return. Mr. Gaslow has waited for you all these years. That's devotion."

"I know, Margaret. I'm willing to marry Mr. Gaslow."

I forced a smile, agreeing without struggle.

The door curtain suddenly lifted. Alexander Foster stepped inside, his face dark.

"Mia, who are you planning to marry?"

He was still calling me Mia with that easy confidence. I found it absurd.

"Daniel, this is my business. It has nothing to do with you."

The moment I spoke, Alexander's expression shifted. He yanked Margaret away from me with a sudden, furious motion.

"You old hag, Alexander hasn't been gone long, and you already think you can push Mia toward another man. Don't you have any shame? Mia loves Alexander. She will never give herself to anyone else."

Margaret, believing he was Daniel Foster, tried to reason with him. "Daniel, Alexander has been gone for more than a year. Mia is only 25. Do you want her to live as a widow forever?"

"So what if she does? Mia loves Alexander. She's willing to stay faithful to him for life."

His words made me chuckle under my breath, a sound edged with frost.

Everyone understood how tragic it was for a 25-year-old woman to be widowed for life. What none of them knew was that my husband wasn't dead.

He was standing right in front of me, watching me silently. Watching me try to die again and again, like a fool.

When I was younger, I had sworn I would rather marry a stray dog than marry Alexander.

Alexander also fled to a remote desert for a research project just to avoid our arranged marriage.

But three years later, his grandmother fell gravely ill and wished to see him married before she passed. We had no choice but to honor the old engagement.

That wedding night, surprisingly, we had undeniable chemistry.

We stayed in each other's embrace until dawn, and after that, the strong, tireless man wanted me every single day. We became known as the most affectionate couple.

Then he left on a mission. His twin brother, Daniel, came back carrying a blood-stained watch and told me, voice hoarse, "Mia, Alexander's gone."

I had lost my mind. I tried to find Alexander's body until my mother-in-law, Anna Greyson, had to physically restrain me. I swallowed pills, slit my wrist, and threw myself into a river.

Six attempts, six rescues.

And in the end, all of it was a lie.

My supposedly dead, devoted husband stood right before my eyes. His calm expression gave nothing away.

I didn't expose him. I only nodded, handed Margaret a slip of paper, and asked her to leave.

On that paper was the date I had agreed to marry Charles Gaslow.

Three days from now. In three days, I would board the boat to the island and begin a new life.

Seeing me dismiss Margaret willingly, Alexander looked satisfied. He even brought me a bowl of beef stew and told me to take care of myself.

Later, as I packed my luggage that night, sounds drifted from the room next door. Rhythmic, breathless, rising and falling.

I was not an inexperienced woman. The moment I heard it, I knew exactly what was happening.

Mixed in with the breathless sounds were faint fragments of conversation.

"Daniel, that supplement you bought really did the trick. You… you're stronger than you used to be."

The man let out a low, smug laugh. "You cling to me every day. I have to improve somehow. And ever since we used all of Mia's salary to buy supplements to nourish the baby, your skin has gotten softer too."

I froze. A wave of nausea rose hard and fast within me. Once I understood what I was hearing, I bolted from the room and leaned over in the front yard, retching until my stomach cramped.

Anna suddenly stepped out and laid a hand on my shoulder. "Mia, what's wrong? Did you eat something bad tonight?"

I looked up at her worried face and forced down the bitterness tightening in my chest.

"I'm fine, Anna."

In this whole house, Anna was the only one who truly cared about me. I didn't want her to worry.

Remembering that I would be leaving for the island in three days to be married, I reached into my pocket for the wages I had saved and was about to hand them to her.

But Anna hesitated. She slipped a folded sheet of paper into my hand, and said, troubled, "Mia, I know this promotion means a great deal to you. But Ale— Daniel said Lily is pregnant. She… she needs the promotion more."

The banknotes in my hand scattered to the floor like confetti.

'Alexander, are you even a man? You covet my promotion, wear your brother's name to please your brother's wife, and push your own mother to deliver the news,' I thought.

I had reached my limit. I marched inside and knocked on the door next to my room, where soft moans were still drifting out.

"Daniel, come out. I have something to say."

I left him the last shred of dignity by not calling him by his true name. Anna tried to stop me, but the door opened before she could speak.

Alexander and Lily stepped out, clothes disheveled, faces tight with annoyance.

"What are you doing, Mia?" Alexander asked sharply. "Knocking this late. Don't you know you're disturbing us?"

I laughed coldly in response. "Did you tell your mom to ask me to give my promotion spot to Lily?"

At the question, he instantly grew evasive. He lowered his head and said nothing.

Lily and I worked in the same department. Each cycle, only one promotion slot was available, and competition was intense. This time, only the two of us were shortlisted.

In every metric—evaluations, performance, reputation—I outranked her. The promotion was always meant to be mine.

I stared straight at Alexander. He kept his head bowed, refusing to meet my eyes. When he finally spoke, his voice faltered. "Mia, Lily is pregnant. If she misses this chance, it'll be even harder for her to be promoted once she has a child. She isn't like you. You have no children, no burden."

His plea was thin and weak. He knew why.

Because we once had a child.

After I received the news of Alexander's death, I made my first suicide attempt. When I was pulled back from the brink, Anna wept at my bedside and told me I had been two months pregnant. But grief had been too much for my body. The baby could not be saved.

I had loathed myself then for being so useless. I hated that I couldn't protect the only child I would ever have with Alexander.

I hurt myself again and again, starved myself, and tried to follow him into death.

And where had the man I loved been all that time?

Alexander was in the next room, creating new life again and again with his sister-in-law.

I tipped my head back, forcing my tears to stay where they were.

When I still didn't speak, Alexander grabbed my arm tightly and pleaded, "Mia, you're well liked and your performance is outstanding. You'll have other chances. Don't worry, we'll make sure to thank you properly."

He fully slipped into Daniel's identity, begging for Lily as if she truly were his wife.

Listening to those half-pleading, half-pressuring words almost made me laugh in anger.

I pulled my arm free, my expression calm. "I can give her the spot. But there's no need for any thanks. I wish you both a healthy child soon and a long life together."

The blessing sounded polite enough, yet the edge beneath it was unmistakable. Alexander froze, unable even to look at me.

Seeing him like that only made something cold coil tighter inside me. It didn't matter. I had already decided to leave with Charles.

The promotion meant nothing to me now. Once I was gone, the department would automatically award it to Lily.

I just hadn't expected Alexander would go this far for her. If I hadn't agreed to leave with Charles, would they have kept draining my salary for their baby and taken the promotion that belonged to me?

My nails dug hard into my palm as I fought back the rising storm inside.

After a brief stunned pause, Alexander's eyes lit with relief and excitement. "Really, Mia? You're really willing to give the spot to Lily?"

He hurried inside and returned with a cold boiled egg. I knew it was bought with my salary. I stared at it without taking it, then turned and walked back to my room.

The dim lamp stretched Alexander's shadow across the hall. He stood there for a long time. Lily had to call him several times before he finally returned inside.

None of it mattered. I was leaving. Still, Alexander, I hoped you would never regret this.

The next morning, after Lily successfully submitted her application, Alexander rushed to host a celebratory dinner for her.

At the restaurant, Lily clung to his arm, her expression smug.

"I told you shortcuts don't work," she said brightly. "You only get promoted by working hard. Isn't that right, Mia?"

She turned to me as she spoke, raising her glass deliberately. "And I should thank you, Mia. Without you, I wouldn't have gotten the spot."

With just a few sentences, she flipped the truth upside down. The expressions around the table shifted, eyes turning toward me with a strange mix of pity and judgment, as if I had done something disgraceful.

Whispers spread through the room. I sat stiffly, refusing to take the glass from Lily's hand.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Alexander. His face tightened with guilt. He quickly took the glass from Lily and smoothed things over with a smile.

"Lily, Mia looks tired. She probably didn't sleep well last night. Let her skip the drink."

Lily's smile faltered, though she said nothing.

Across the table, I watched the two of them serving each other food, while I slowly prodded the pasta on my plate.