A strong taste of blood filled my mouth.

I suddenly vomited everything I had eaten.

Patrick quickly poured me some water.

But I kept vomiting more and more, tears streaming down my face.

I pushed Patrick's hand away and slowly said, "No."

In my current state, I didn't want to be a burden to anyone.

My grandmother helped me up, and as I got closer, I noticed how much thinner her hands had become and how much more of her white hair had fallen out.

Suddenly, a deep sadness washed over me.

Grandma had aged so much; she didn't even look like herself anymore.

At an age when she should be enjoying the company of her grandchildren, she was instead taking care of her sick family members.

This once happy and harmonious home was now shrouded in the shadow of death.

My aging grandmother, my sick mother, and I—we were all just waiting to die.

After Patrick left, Grandma asked me to stay with her for a while.

"I'm old. Every time we see each other might be the last. I can't leave your mother's side, and I can't go to the hospital to take care of you." Grandma's rough hands kept stroking my cheek. "I'm sorry, my dear..."

Grandma couldn't visit me in the hospital.

I didn't have the strength to come home on my own.

After this, Carl probably wouldn't bring me back again.

As I thought about it, the pain in my body started up again.

Seeing my discomfort, Grandma sang a lullaby to soothe me to sleep.

Her song, mingled with the curses from the next room, filled my mind.

"Sleep, sleep, my dear baby."

"Janet, why don't you just die!"

"Sleep, sleep, Mama loves you."

"I hate you, Janet, I hate you!"

The mixture of comfort and curses was like a slow, painful cut—a brief moment of sweetness followed by bone-deep pain.

……

As I was drifting off to sleep, I heard Grandma mention Carl.

"That boy was so good to you. If only he could stay with you, I could rest easy."

I closed my eyes as tears slipped out uncontrollably.

Carl had been so, so good to me.

So good that even on the brink of death, I couldn't forget him.

I met Carl when I was six years old.

He came from a very poor family, and no one wanted to befriend him.

But I liked playing with him.

To me, he was the most handsome child around, second only to myself.

I would bring him home to eat and have him play house with me.

From a very young age, he took care of me. When I wanted to climb a tree, he would kneel down and let me use him as a ladder.

When my parents wouldn't buy me ice cream, he'd save up money from collecting trash to buy it for me.

Later, we grew up.

I became a dance major and was accepted into an arts school without having to take the entrance exam. Carl's family couldn't afford to send him to high school, so he used his excellent grades to get into a vocational school to study nursing.

We went our separate ways and gradually lost contact.

The next time we met was five years later at a class reunion.

Carl had become highly skilled and was noticed by a wealthy patient.

He started as a private nurse, and within a few years, he had established his own company and quickly rose to success.

That night, a drunken Carl grabbed my hand, fueled by the courage from alcohol.

"Janet, I finally have the right to pursue you."

The entire street was covered in roses, and Carl was practically willing to dig out his heart and give it to me.

After playing hard to get for a while, I finally accepted Carl's pursuit.

The way he looked at me, it was as if he were gazing at the moon.

When we first got together, many people doubted us.

"Carl is just a lackey living off the scraps of wealthy businessmen. He's destined to serve others his whole life. He has no background, no education, and that little company of his won't last long."

I didn't listen to any of it.

I believed that someone like Carl would achieve great things one day.

And the time I spent with him was the happiest of my life.

Back then, both my parents were alive, and our family was harmonious.

I was the princess held in the palm of their hands, the shining white swan on the stage, and the lover Carl cherished with all his heart.

Carl watched every one of my performances, clapping for me and bringing me flowers.

I told him my dream was to become the greatest dancer in the world.

He said, "My dream is to make Janet the happiest person in the world."

But then my dream was shattered.

During one of my performances, I lost control and fell.

After that, my father died, my mother lost her mind, the house was sold, and we had no money left.

I didn't want to be a burden to Carl, so I broke up with him.

My happy times ended forever.

I woke up from my memories.

I wasn't at home but in the hospital.

Patrick looked at me with sadness, "You had an episode, and it scared your grandma."

He quickly added, "But I reassured her that I'm here with you, so she doesn't have to worry."

I nodded in thanks.

Then Patrick said, "Carl is on his way. You were calling his name the whole time you were unconscious."

Carl was the one thing I couldn't let go of, even in death.

I hesitated, wondering if I should tell Carl the truth from back then before I die. But just then, I happened to glance out the window and saw Carl stepping out of a Maybach.

He was with a girl who was as pure and beautiful as a magnolia flower.

They hugged, waved, and parted reluctantly.

I quickly looked away.

In that moment, I wished I could go completely blind.

That way, my eyes wouldn't see, and my heart wouldn't ache.

Patrick silently pulled the curtains shut. "I'll be going now. Call me anytime if you need anything."

Carl passed by Patrick without a word.

He had a wicked smile on his face. "Janet, you still have that charm. Is he the rich guy you've latched onto, or just a sucker you plan to toss aside?"

I didn't know how to answer that question, and I didn't have the strength to either.

Having just woken up, my body hadn't fully recovered, and half of it was numb, with no feeling at all.

"Carl, my little company has made it."

"What?"

I finally managed to speak, though my voice was terribly hoarse.

Carl looked at me silently, his eyes filled with emotions I couldn't read.

"I'm rich now. I don't need to serve anyone anymore."

I understood.

Carl didn't want to do this anymore.

And why would he? His career was successful, and his love life was fulfilling.

There was no reason for him to continue with this exhausting job of feeding and caring for someone.

Besides, he probably didn't want his girlfriend to know he was still in contact with his ex.

Carl had always been good to the people he cared about.

"Alright. I won't pay the final installment then."

After all, I was going to die soon, and dignity didn't really matter anymore.

It wasn't like I hadn't been incontinent before—my lower body was completely numb, and I couldn't even feel myself lying in a mess.

The smell might be unpleasant, but that was something I could get used to.

Better to leave the money for Grandma.

She wouldn't be able to take care of my mom for many more years.

"Janet!" Carl suddenly got angry. "You went through all this trouble to contact me, put on this act in front of me, for what...?"