"Pretend? To be in a relationship? With you?"

He said it emphatically and seemed surprised at what I said. I nodded slowly and avoided looking at him. He chuckled, and his perfect white teeth showed up. He touched the bridge of his nose, and his expression became dark. There was some pain in my heart as I watched his mocking reaction.

He has a fiancée; this man in front of me has a fiancée. And I'm here asking him to pretend to be his girlfriend so her fiance will show up.

"So what is this? You'll use me as a cover up for your scandal?"

"Oh! Says the mighty, respectable CEO, having some important meetings enclosed for hours in his office." His auburn eyebrows met in one line.

"What?" He laughed without humor.

"Oh! You can't fool me. Meetings that last that long?"

My voice trembled with extreme irritation. I can feel my face heating up again. I want to cry at the thought that he believes in the scandal that is spreading. His eyes narrowed, seemingly unable to understand what I was saying. I rolled my eyes at him.

"We're sailing too far from our topic. I don't care who you fvck and how long you do your woman here.

"Where did you learn those words, Ava? And what the fvck are you talking about?"

His voice thundered. His hawk like eyes are ready to destroy me. I rolled my eyes again.

"It's okay. Don't be so defensive; I'm open minded. I'm used to—"

"You’re ‘used’ to it!?What the actual fvck are you tryna 'say huh?"

"What else then? Your secretary said that you were having an important meeting, but it took another five hours? Really Levi? Who's the unprofessional now?"

"Look at me."

 He whispered. I didn’t follow him and focused on my nails.

"Look at me, please."

He touched my chin with his fingers and made me meet his eyes. The tenderness and sweetness of his voice shook the wall I had tried to build between the two of us. His deep set of eyes are soft and drunk. He grabbed the tip of my elbow and pulled me even closer to him as if the thin space gap between the two of us was still missing. I was like a flame dancing with his flow of wind, letting him take me on his own swing.

"Katrina is my dad's employee. She arrived just as I ended my meeting with the attorney to drop off the documents I need."

His eyes were wide as he stared at me. I looked at his lips, and he gently grabbed my attention again to look him in the eye.

"It's your employee's fault." My voice was hoarse, and I couldn’t recognize it.

"Should I fire here?"

"No!"

That's ridiculous, you don't fire people just because of that.

"Uh-huh?"

His eyes were playful, so I avoided looking at him again.

"Now tell me, where did you learn those words, huh? You're accent is music to my ears, but it's not working with that dirty mouth of yours."

I gulped again when I felt his warm breath on my face. Now his eyes are on my lips.

"That's not what I meant here. If you don't agree with what I'm saying, I'm leaving."

I said it without hesitation. Gradually, I began to feel annoyed with myself because I was like a slave enslaved by his caresses. It's just like that, and I immediately weaken and give in to him.

"What's this all about, huh? The last time we talked, you asked me to pretend that we didn't know each other. And now this? What's with this pretending thing?"

He hissed. I didn’t answer him because I just remembered what happened to us last week.

"What are you up to? Please tell me."

He groaned and rested his forehead on my shoulder. It was as if something was missing in my stomach at the tenderness of his voice.

"We'll pretend?"

His palm found its way to my hands, while his other hand is on the side of my chair.

"But the last time I checked, we didn't break up."

My heartbeat went berserk, like an animal that has long been confined and loves to get away.

"You won't bring the past to me again, Levi."

Her eyes narrowed as he nodded. His hands slide from mine down to the side of my chair. Now he seems to be confining me here in my chair. He sighed heavily. It seemed so hard with his emotions.

"I've waited for years... If that's the only thing you can offer, then I'll gladly accept what I deserve."

The corners of my eyes warmed at what he said. I can sense the pain in his words, which make me weak.

How can I unlove this man? I can't just put all the blame on him, because in the first place, I'm hurting because I'm allowing this to happen. When it comes to him, I am so weak. All the strength and plan I had developed over the years seemed to be disappearing. Just by his touch, his words, and his caress, everything has surrendered to me. He's good. He's good at pretending and playing with me.

"Great!"

I said it enthusiastically, even as my tears were forming clouds in my eyes. He raised his gaze at me as if confused. I'm pursing a smile on my lips, and it's dark.

"My company will soon give a statement about this, since you already know that our photos have been spread everywhere." His eyes were cold and silent at what I said. "From now on, if you're asked by the press and media, say that I am your girlfriend."

"You are my girlfriend." I don’t know if he was imitating me or correcting what I said.

"Y-yeah! And if I'm asked, then I'll tell them that you are my boyfriend."

"So what am I? I'm sort of your boy toy, huh?"

"We'll both benefit from this, Levi, and you know that. Just cooperate!"

I wanted to say it for her fiancé, but it was good, so I resisted. He raised his brows and pursed his lips. He did not speak for a few seconds as I waited for his answer. "Okay." I narrowed my eyes at him. His eyes were very lazy.

"Treat me like your slave if you want, if that's the cooperation you're talking about."

Wow. Did he agree? That's easy. "Okay, then, I'm good to go."

I stood up, and he backed away from what I had done. He held my wrist and looked up at me with his puffy eyes. It looks like a child will be left by his mother.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going home." He cocked his head to the other side and glared at me.

"Let's go." He stood up and turned the table around again. I am confused by what he did.

 "What? I'm going home alone!" On his cellphone, he turned to me again.

"And what do you want people to think? That I'm letting my girlfriend book a car service and go home alone, coming from the inside of my company? Really Ava?"

I looked at him innocently as if I couldn't get what he said. He's right, but... we have to pretend just to the press and not to the citizens of this country. He raised his eyebrows because I looked so puzzled looking at him. Am I circling him or am I circling him?

"Let's go."

Summer have ended swiftly. This is so far the busiest summer I've been through. Although I was new to the system of life, I gradually learned everything. Lourd is always there to guide me all through out my struggles. Photo shoots, trainings, etiquettes and such all I had to go through. Even the school I've enrolled in Manila is all set. Everything was taken care of by Lourd's manager. I'm just waiting for my signature to make everything more real. There's no turning back even though my signature isn't there yet. Everything is turning into colors slowly and surely.

"Is New York beautiful? I saw on the internet that there are many buildings there."

I heard him laugh from the other line. I pouted. I feel like I'm just always being ridiculous in his eyes. Hearing, by the way.

"You love buildings, I forgot." He mocked.

He knew it. He was really just teasing me. He knew how much I wanted to see the City lights that he keeps on flexing about. He knew how much I've draw buildings on my sketch book. He knew it.

"Do you want to come here?" I sighed.

This one is teasing me again.

"I'm serious Ava. Do you want me to bring you here?"

I fell silent. I can't seem to imagine what he wants to happen. Is he asking me if we want to travel together?

"Hmm-hmm" I nodded.

I like that. I love that but I don't know why I have so little pain in my heart. I never knew that we've come this far. I never knew that I could dream that far. I thought there should always be a limit when you dream, especially if the dreamer is a scoundrel like me. I remember dreaming about him, dream or illusion all that I remember. Dreaming of being with him for more time every time he's in the office, dreaming for at least a minor attention.

Before, he seems so far out of reach, now he told me he is I feel all that ispossible. He'll always be the range of my limit, nothing equals his dream. Even reaching heaven is unmatched.

"After you graduate I'll bring you in any country you want." He breathed.

I miss him so much. It's only been a week since he left Mar De Vena again and headed to New York for what he says is the conference. He said he was sent as the representative of his father. In addition, we only met for a short time when he was here because he was staying at their hotel in the center.

The Solidad's are here but Sir Constantine left for Manila. It's okay and I'm not alone here in the mansion. So I couldn't help but miss him even more. And now that he's saying this, another dream of mine was molded. We'll come that far soon Levi. Not just at the end of Mar De Vena.

"Are you still not gonna sign the contract?"

Lourd presented me with the contract. I looked at him and just gave up.

"Can I handle all this?"

I brushed my curled hair because of another photo shoot we did this afternoon. Right here in their hotel bar. My make up is heavy and it's a bit new and daring than the usual photo shoots we do. So now that I am aware of the reality of the job I will be entering, I am wondering if I will be able to handle all this by the time I sign this contract.

"You know that I'll always be here right?"

Let's face it. Although Lourd and I didn't have a good start, she has played a big role in my life in recent months. He is the reason I am facing the big change in my life today. I'm thankful that I had a friend but an enemy at the same time. Even if I didn't tell him, he knew I was very grateful to him. Suddenly he entered my life, things I did not expect God to give me.

Levi:

Baby,

I opened his message while going out in the elevator, Lourd was about to take me back to the Solidad. My chest throbbed for no apparent reason. I felt nervous reading his texts, he had that text before but it was alone and he seemed to have something important to say.

As we walked into the lobby, I typed on my cellphone to reply to him. Me: Is there a problem? Before I could even send it Lourd stopped walking in front of me. At his height I had to side to see the reason for his stop.

Lourd's expression seemed bored and when I ruled out the reason for his stop I was also surprised. A middle aged woman wearing a tan sleeveless knee length coat. A skinny black pants was underneath that coat. The belt was close to his waist and I could see the curve of his body. The tans talons heels are clacking while straightly looking at our direction.

She got the smirk on her face as her straight hair didn't seem to be disturbed by any gust of wind. I also stopped because of Lourd's disposition. Why does he look so shocked and afraid? The woman finally came in front of us and two strong men were behind her. Now that she's near, now I see more of her beauty, not paying attention to her age. Even the flap bag she's holding was mesmerizing. I'm intimidated.

"How are you hiding in your son's nest?"

Its cold voice echoed in the quiet lobby. Her side of lips rose but I don't see any humor in it. I was confused by what was happening. This was probably the first time I had seen Lourd without saying anything. His face was restrained but could not look into the woman's eyes. My leg shook as it shifted its gaze to me. Her eyes are cold and intimidating. She scanned me from head to toe until she almost state words as if she's spitting it.

"The news is true, that you brought a hypocrite here."

She smirked. My mouth fell open. My eyes are shocked by her words.

"Ma, please. Let's not include Ava here."

Lourd blocked his arm and forced me to go behind him. My whole being seemed to cool when I heard what Lourd had said. Ma? His mother? Levi's mother? "Ma?" She spat with amusement.

"I'm never you mother, kid."

Her words were even sharper than a dagger, which caused Lourd to bow to his mother's words. The people in the lobby seemed to stop what they were doing.

"Ava?"

She turned his gaze to me, parting my lips to release the building pressure in my throat.

"There is no one else. Until the next life you will still force yourself on the life that is not for you."

It was as if a dagger had pierced my heart. Especially when I saw his eyes full of disgust and hatred. I couldn't understand anything he was saying but to hear it from the mother of the person I love I couldn't bear.

"Ma, please!"

Lourd exclaimed but that doesn't shake her.

"Like your mother, you also try to squeeze yourself into someone you can't reach."

Gradually tears welled up in my eyes, my legs are shaking so bad. The whole lobby's attention was on us.

"The thickness of your face stick your name on my son's name! You inherited from your ambitious and inaccessible mother!"

Lourd kept me hiding behind him. I bowed down to shed my tears. I tried to hide the sobs that I almost vomited. Her anger was clear, the way she shouted and pointed at my face was all clear. The only vague thing was that he joined in my mother's name.

"Isn't your mother's soul still can't move on and when she can't get my husband it's my son you're trying to take !?"

It was as if my heart was pounding with the pain of his words. It was as if I was being killed by the fact that it was slowly opening up in my mind.

"We're leaving here, Ma. You don't have to make a scandal here-"

"I'm not your mother!"

He tried to catch up with me but Lourd blocked between the two of us. The female crew was fast and in a flash Lourd was holding them. My cheeks filled with tears when I saw his eyes mocking and full of anger. Full of hatred and abomination.

"Is it money again? For sure it was all about the money, that's really what your mother wanted first."

With dim eyes I could clearly see the rage that was alive in him. I was unable to defend the mother because of the unknown fact. Has the mother been a fixture? And who? When his wife? The father of the person I love the most? I shuddered as I tried to suppress the sobs.

"I love Levi-"

"Ma!"

Simultaneously with the numbness of my cheek was the suddenness of everyone. During these times my mind went blank. Eveything went blank as soon as I felt her palm on my cheeks.

"You're disgusting! You're not only flirty like your mother, but you still look like money!"

My knees are weak and my heart seemed to be killed over and over again. Not even my sobs were left in the air and I could barely breathe in the pain I felt. I understand the loath, I understand where she's coming from, understand the critic but I think this is enough.

"This is what you tell your mother the next time you meet, neither in heaven nor in hell, you will never get the men in my life no matter how many times you desire!"

Even before I could kneel in the weakness I felt, Lourd caught up with me.

"Enough! You have no right to hurt Ava! We know you're the criminal here!"

His mother spat a shocked laugh at his son's statement. I can't take my eyes off him. I struggled to memorize how furious he looked so that even in the next life I could carry the pain of the truth I just found out.

"You've caused the fire in their Island so Ava's family died! So my real mother disappeared!"

I thought that was all there was to it. My whole system trembled, my gaze fell to the floor and I completely lost myself. All I can think of was my mother and my father. How much I've wanted to disappear at this moment. I can't digest everything. It's even worse than the nightmare.

"Don't worry. Cause every time I declare your name as my mother, I despise it a lot. It's embarrassing to carry your last name. It's embarrassing to be part of your family."

Levi, we've really come so far.

"So you'll go-see?"

She flung herself on the sofa and lifted up the big T-shirt my sister owned, I saw her red underwear. Seriously? I'm so use seeing her like this every time she visits us here in our flat. My brother is not used though.

"No. I'll get the copy of my Editorial in NY Management."

"I thought you had another, again. You've been beaten at work for a few months, Cy."

I zipped my Suede knee high Boots. I adjust the belt on the waist part of my over sized knitted sweater.

"Working your ass off again."

"Last 2 Editorials ... and catalog."

She stared at me because I knew he didn’t believe me.

"Promise." She hissed.

"That's the same line you said last time I came here."

I got my chain bag in the high stool and I looked again at my appearance in the mirror. I have to exhaust everything. If I got enough money to pursue last year of my college and and buy my own unit then I'll settle. It would be enough if I could work in a company through the profession I want.

Lourd? He has his own plans. We even argued a few times about things. I know Lucy and him have plans to settle eventually, they're right of age and I don't want to hinder them both. They've waited almost half of their life so it'll be my happiness if they own find their way for each other. But this is not my brother’s word of mouth to me. Lucy bombed out a laughter and I got so shocked with it. What's wrong with her? Too much sugar intake? He quickly sat down again and laid his face on the backrest of the sofa.

"This is unusual. You're gonna walk the streets of New York with that outfit?"

"W-why? What's wrong?"

I glanced at myself and was nervous. I'm never good at styling myself. I'm used wearing comfortable clothes, it just happened that I need to dress my self a little bit 'cause camera will be all over the place. Now my Editorial Magazine is out so for sure paparazzi will be everywhere sticking their noses at me. I don't have my body guards, and my manager is in the company waiting for me.That means I'll have to drive alone.

"Nothing is wrong Cyreese. I am seeing you wrong. The paparazzi and tabloids are celebrating you again."

My shoulder dropped at what he said. It will be 4 years in 2 months of being in this industry and I'm still not used in this limelight I've entered in. It was the substitute for everything I desired.

"I know. I don't want to wear this though."

She chuckled and finally approached me. She fixed the buckle of my belt and beat my legs.

"Aww."

"Flaunt your ass. It's only a year and you'll be leaving New York. Might as well give them a proper good bye. Duh ~ Gossips and stuff."

I was shaken by what Lucy was saying. Since his childhood, this has been the world he has come to know. He has mastered almost every system, and he is numb to every issue that will go through his life. I'm not. And I will never be used too it. "

How's Justine?"

Her eyebrows furrowed with meaning. The smirk on her lips is naughty so I turned my back on her. Are we here again?

"Justine and I are just friends, Lucy."

"Friends? After years of impressing you, still friends?"

I never asked him to impress me. I just spoke to myself.

"Are you sure you don't want to extend your contract? When you boom here in New York then you will say bye."

"I want to pursue my -"

"Studies. Yes. Of course."

She shrugged and raised her hands in the air as a sign of surrender.

"Study my ass."

She whispered at the end and just shook me. I still have a year to strive. The situation over the past two years has been very critical. Tons of projects in and out of my work and studies. So my 4 year contract is about to end. I want to focus on last year because that is the reason for all this.

"How are you two?"

Her mouth was covered and there seemed to be no answer to what I said. I frowned at his reaction.

"You guys fought again?"

I haven’t been here in the apartment for a few weeks because of the out of town photoshoot I did, so I don’t know if anything happened here while I was away. I haven't met Lourd since I got home. Only he alone.

"Nah, you're brother is just ... being weird. What time will you be home? That'll ask about you."

When he changes the subject immediately. Maybe they have another fight. I left her at the apartment and went to work.

"Would you like some beverage Ms. Suarez?"

I turned to a clerk here at the company.

"Yes please." I smiled.

"The possible circulation of those copy will be higher than the usual. We're also producing copies around Asia."

"What?"

My eyes widened at what he said. I forget the language I just borrowed.

"I mean, Asia? But we used to reach beyond circulation even though we focused on selling those in the west."

She was all smiling but I'm too shocked to comprehend. This is too much. They told me it was a big project but I didn't think it would reach the other side of the world. Several more talks were opened with some of the company’s executives. They were asking about my renewal of contract and other aspects. My answer is the same at first. I'll stick to my original plan. I have unfinished business left on my own, I think it's about time to focus on that.

"Ms. Suarez, From Mr. Bailey."

I looked at the black box with a perfectly arranged red roses. I almost wiped my face at what I saw. What is this? "

Where is he?"

I chased the clerk before he left.

"In the R&D Deparment Miss."

"Thank you."

I look constipated looking at the flowers left in the coffee table.

"That's so sweet of Justine. How's your relationship with him?"

I almost breathed my forced laugh.

"No ma'am, we're just friends."

"Oh? Really? He's been consistent since day one I thought ..."

The smile I gave here was raw. Everybody thinks of that, what else is new? How many times did I explained the truth to them? I've lost my count.

"Ma'am, She's with Lourd Vidalio isn't she?"

My ear pricked up at the whisper of his assistant. If there's one thing I'm not use hearing about, it's this. Gossips like me and my brother living under the same roof are seldom to pass by. That I would have a relationship with my own brother. I should not be affected by that mere thing 'cause what they think is way-way more different from the truth. But I can't help it. If it's about my brother and my personal life, I just can't help it.

"Thank you for your time Ma'am, But I got some errands to do so ..."

"Oh yes, Congratulations Ms. Suarez."

I thanked everybody, I was going to lift the flower box in front of me but one of my bodyguards lifted it. Don't ask me. I also thought they were gone now. My manager is not here and left a body guard here. That's good and it's just one. I walked down the long hallway to go to the R&D Department.

My body guard drove for me all the way to the university. I just submitted the floor plan which I also gave a few weeks of time and time. I combined both shoots and vigil just after that.

I breathed a sigh of relief when my prof accepted that. I fully expected him to decline it because of my one week grace period. As much as I wanted to be treated fairly I had no choice but to ask for this privilege because my schedule could not afford it.

"Uhm, can you please drop me by the cafe. Thanks."

I dialed my manager's number who's apparently Lourd's manager too. I apologize for being late but she's cool with it.

"I'm really sorry. I still passed my last requirement at Univ."

He seemed to ignore what I said and apparently just greeted me to kiss my cheek.

"My very own Cyreese Suarez! Congratulations!"

I smiled looking at her. I was embarrassed at the attention I received from someone else in the cafe for declaring my name. Some started to take some photos, I'm not used to it yet.

"And now you're towering Asia!" She exclaimed.

I breathed a deep sigh.That's what I wanted to clarify.

"I didn't know that the contract I signed includes production in Asia, Tita Matilda."

In the amount of shoot I’ve done these past few months I didn’t realize the client’s weird contract turned out to be what he was signing with me. It's her Job to inform me but she didn't mention anything.

From the very executive of NYM came. It’s embarrassing that I was even surprised when I knew I should be getting the job I was getting. He stopped at what I said and slowly sipped his coffee.

"Darling, I'm sure that won't make any noise in the Philippines."

"But still aunt, you know how much I wanted to erase my name into their issues. I know I'm not their target but what about my brother? He's been through so much already. I don't want to be the reason he's broken like that again. gradually cooling and his name is there. "

Lourd is a very well known public image in the Philippines. Since everything happened that day a big noise and wave was made then not only in his personal life but in his whole family. My brother have suffered for how many months clearing his name into the public.

He sacrificed his own free will just to protect the family he grew up with and loved. But seeing him all through that moments was a pain to me. He tends to look so strong but I know deep inside he's unwell. It was not right for him to let everyone know that he had turned his back on his family even though his mother had vomited him up. Our first year here in NYC was not easy.

We've both dealt with our own miserable knots. I'm busy healing while he focused on me so much when I know he's deeply wounded too. If I was utterly wounded by the truths that came to my mind that night, what else is he who has long forced himself into a lie even though he knows the truth.

He never think of himself. He never acknowledge his pain and failures instead he help me cope up. He's the only person I can trust. There's no way I can fill a space in my heart for a love I thought was true yet it was just full of lies. It all just happened because I allowed it. And now I don't want to loose my brother just because of my own egocentric.

So I won’t let all my brother’s suffering go for nothing. I badly wanted to forget anything from the past and have a fresh star with him and Lucy who happened to be my family now. If my name makes a noise, his name will definitely be involved again and I don't want to get to that point.

"As long as you maintain a good scandal in that span of your promotion there's nothing to worry about Darling. And for all I know, there you are great. Keeping your image clean."

I breathed a deep sigh.

"In a few months Cyreese, your contract will end. If there is no problem you can easily get all your cards and say good bye. So if you don't want what you fear to happen, better behave and trust your management. Hmkay?"

She fixed the parting of my hair with the comfort he did. For some reason, my heart was not at peace with what he said. I don't know if I'm just bothered or I don't really have a good feeling about it.

"Oh, he's here."

I looked in the direction he was staring and I saw my brother. I smiled but his expression remained grim. It approached me and kissed the top of my forehead. The cafe was noisy because of the rumor that happened. I saw how he looked badly at the people there before he sat down next to me. I grabbed her arm and her expression immediately softened.

"Lourd, chill. You know those people are just bugs who are thirsty for another gossip.

"Should we plan about your contract renewal?"

Lourd leaned over and toyed with his key on the table.

"Ava's not gonna do it so ..."

My eyes narrowed confusedly looking at him.

"What? Lourd, no. We haven't talked about this yet? I can manage on my own. You can just focus on yourself, to Lucy, to both of you!"

Tita Matilda just sneezed at the way it looked. She's aware, she's been taking care of it for a long time.

"We won't argue about this again Ava."

"Cyreese,” I corrected him.

---

Tita Matilda:

Cyreese Suarez! Check this.

My forehead frowned. What is wrong this time? I click the link he gave me and it barely loads on my cellphone screen due to the successive explosion of my notifications on social media.

What the hell is happening? I was overwhelmed and amazed at what Lucy was doing. There's this unknown nervousness and crazy beat inside my chest as I wait for the page to load. Is this something bad?

Lucy sniffed when she saw I was an idiot. He sat with me and leaned on my shoulder, his exact look at the screen of my cellphone was the appearance of an article from Aunt Matilda's message.

"What. The. Fuck !?"

Lucy shrieked out of horror for me. He seemed to utter the content of my mind, while I seemed to have my tongue cut out because of what I had read. Coldness dripped on my face, my soul seemed to escape me. The door of my room popped and then my sister spat as if in a hurry because of the screaming Lucy made.

"What happened?"

"Scandal ?! Sex video? Really, Ava Cyreese Suarez?"

My mouth hanged open while gently shaking Lucy. Hindi can believe what I read, I didn't stop as if when i shake that I can also tell the whole world that not everything is true.