NOAH

It's only mid-January, but it feels like early fall.

It's just a bonfire party in the woods, but it feels like Hell.

Caleb doesn't agree with me, though.

"For fuck's sake, you are dramatic." He rolls his eyes at me and nuzzles into his girlfriend, Haley. She giggles, and her dark brown hair slides in front of them like a curtain.

I can hear but-thank the fucking Lord-I can't see the way their tongues are tangling together.

"There's fire and sinners as far as the eye can see. Feels like Hell to me," I respond.

Usually, Caleb would take this opportunity to point out his many angelic qualities as proof we couldn't be in Hell.

But his mouth is too busy doing things God surely wouldn't approve of.

That is, assuming the Big Guy Upstairs isn't super into public displays of affection.

I sigh and go back to surveying the party.

Winter break is supposed to be exactly that-a break. A break from school, and more precisely, from my fellow Ravenlake Academy students.

Yet here I am, sitting in the woods with a horde of my shit-faced classmates. They're drinking and laughing and making out all around me.

If it had just been us Golden Boys chilling, maybe I'd be in a better mood. But there are too many other people here I'd rather not see.

A beetle lands on my shoulder, buzzing in my ear. I lean forward and flick it into the flames.

"Fucking bugs," I mutter.

More evidence that we're in hell: flying cockroaches. What kind of sick pervert invents something like that?

Only one answer: Satan.

An ice cube pelts me in the chest. I look up to see Finn staring at me, eyebrow raised.

"What?"

"You're being a buzzkill." He holds up a beer can. "Get a drink and lighten up."

Usually, Finn is on my side. At least, he used to be.

But that was before Lily.

Now, he's "happy," or so he says.

To which I say, congratu-fucking-lations.

On the other hand, at least he's not tonguing down his girlfriend a foot away from me. So he's at least one spot better than Caleb on my Shit List rankings.

"You know, Noah, three girls have already asked me if you're here with anyone," Lily says, tossing her platinum blonde hair over her shoulder. "It wouldn't take much more than a look for you to be having a better time."

Lily always had an artsy vibe, but she's refined it since she and Finn started living in New York. She wears loose, paint-splattered jeans with a tight, long-sleeved crop top and chunky leather boots.

Nothing like the girl I would have imagined for Finn.

Not to say I don't like Lily. I do.

I just assumed Finn would end up with a trust fund baby. A spoiled rich girl who said "wine o'clock" unironically and had aspirations of being a "stay-at-home mom" with a full-time nanny.

You could throw a rock and hit ten women like that in this godforsaken town.

I spit on the forest floor. "I don't need a girl to make me happy."

Viktor throws up his plastic cup in a salute, liquid sloshing over the side. "That's right, Miss Independent! You don't need no one, nuh uh." He snaps his fingers to complete the joke.

Everyone else laughs.

I roll my eyes.

"I don't need a donut to be happy, but it helps," Lily argues when the laughter subsides.

"Good idea," Finn says, wrapping an arm around Lily's hips and sliding her closer to him. "Maybe if you get a bite of someone's cake, you won't be such a drag."

Lily gasps. "That is not what I meant!" She turns to me. "It was an analogy. I just meant you could talk to one of them. Maybe get to know them."

Finn barks out a laugh before I can. He pats Lily's head condescendingly. "Oh, sweet Lily. Naïve, idealistic Lily. That is never going to happen."

Lily opens her mouth to argue, but I cut her off before she can. "It's never going to happen."

Her shoulders slump forward. "Why not? They seemed nice."

"That's exactly why! Because they seem nice!" Finn answers. "Does Noah look nice to you? Does it look like he wants a nice girl?"

Lily studies me.

I look away, tired of being under her magnifying glass.

Ever since she and Finn came back to Ravenlake for the holidays, she's been watching me. I mentioned it to Finn last week, but he brushed it off.

"Lily just wants to help people," he said.

"No shit," I'd replied. "Why else would she be with a charity case like you?"

We laughed, and I let it go, but it still bothers me.

I don't need help.

Not from him.

Not from her.

Not from anyone.

J.C. jumps over the log I'm sitting on with both legs, kicking up a cloud of dust, and flops down next to me. "Please tell me you aren't looking to become monogamous. Because I just accepted the offers of a pair of very lovely, very naughty girls who want to meet the two of us in the woods."

He hitches a thumb over his shoulder. I turn just in time to see a curly redhead and a box-dyed brunette strutting into the woods on their heels.

Who wears heels in the woods?

"Are you talking about Penny's Dreadfuls?" Haley asks, top lip curled in disgust. "I saw you talking to them."

Finn immediately asks the question we're all thinking: "How did you do that with Caleb's tongue down your throat?"

But apparently, Haley is capable of swapping spit with Caleb and eavesdropping on the party at the same time.

Talented girl.

Caleb shrugs. "She knows all. I've learned not to question it."

"Penny's Dreadfuls? Like the TV show?" Lily frowns at the group of our friends, waiting for someone to clue her in.

She went to Ravenlake Prep for a year before she and Finn moved to New York, but she somehow managed to avoid the finer points of drama that flow under the stream of everyday bullshit.

"Penelope LaFevre's friends," Finn answers.

Lily shakes her head. "I don't-"

I turn to J.C. "I have no interest in taking a bite out of either of those donuts."

J.C. groans. "Bro, you're killing me. The only reason they were interested is because of you."

"Then I'm doubly uninterested."

Haley nods. "Those girls are horrible. Even you can do better, J.C.," she says.

"Listen, whatever beef you have with the Dreadfuls, I'm not a part of it." J.C. holds up his hands innocently, a joint simmering between his fingers. "Really, I'd love nothing more than to be the bridge that brings you three together. In fact, I've heard nothing brings women together like having sex with the same guy. Perhaps-"

"Finish that sentence and you're dead." Caleb swivels away from Haley, his feet planted flat on the ground, ready to propel him forward at any moment.

Of all the people at this bonfire party, Caleb is the last one I'd pick a fight with. No one in their right, sober mind would even consider it.

And J.C. is far from sober.

J.C. considers the threat for a minute, takes in Haley, who rolls her eyes and sighs, and then shrugs. "It was just a thought."

"If you want to keep your dick attached to your body, never have it again."

Caleb is simmering. Understandably so.

After everything that happened with Bumper and the Hell Princes recently, he's still a little edgy when it comes to keeping Haley safe.

Haley drags a hand down his back to calm him down. She whispers something in his ear, and his features turn soft.

A second later, they're tangled in one another again.

J.C. sighs. "Without underground fighting as an outlet, Caleb is far too pent up."

"Not for long. He's about to release," Viktor cackles, making crude gestures.

Caleb returns them in the firm of a middle finger without once breaking his connection to Haley.

"Once you all are back in school, I'm sure Caleb will find someone to beat down," says Finn. "He always does."

I shake my head. "Doubtful. Now that the Hell Princes have been properly put in their place, I'm worried the next few months will be boring as hell."

"Oh yeah, I forgot we haven't discussed that. Noah pulled a fucking gun!" Viktor throws his head back in a drunken laugh. "I expect that shit from Finn or Caleb, but not you. How long have you been packing?"

"How did I not know you had a gun?" Finn asks, eyebrow raised.

"You have a gun," I point out.

"I know, but I didn't know you had one."

I shrug. "There's a lot you don't know about me."

A series of oohs and ahhs move through the group as they tease me for being cryptic.

But I'm not joking.

Even though I've been a member of the Golden Boys for years, I don't tell them everything. Not by a long shot.

Some secrets are never meant to be revealed.

2

NOAH

I lean back and watch the party for a while. Shadows move in front of the bonfire.

Laughter and music ring out, and the clink of vodka bottles sounds amongst the trees.

The Golden Boys' conversation goes on without me.

Until something catches my eye.

A wave of golden blonde hair disappearing behind the trunk of an oak tree.

Even without seeing her face, I know who it is.

And tonight, I'm just drunk enough to start some shit.

I stand up, throw my can into the fire, and jog into the trees. Finn says my name, confusion in his voice, but I ignore him.

They won't follow me. They know better than that.

I can see her path through the trees. I move past more than a few couples in various stages of undressing and fornicating until I've left everyone behind.

Everyone but her.

Just as I begin to wonder whether this was all nothing more than my drunk mind making shit up, I hear a rustle to my right and turn.

There she is.

Penelope LaFevre.

Penny is leaning against a tree, her face tilted to the canopy of brown leaves above. Her eyes are closed, and despite the fact I wasn't working to be quiet, she doesn't seem to have heard me.

For one second, I forget why I followed her.

For one fucking, fleeting second, I forget I threw her out of my life.

I forget how strange it is to even be this close to her.

Then, she sighs, opens her eyes, and sees me. She starts to scream in surprise.

I leap forward and slap a hand over her mouth.

"Shh," I reprimand. "You're loud."

I only remove my hand once I'm sure she's quieted down.

Penny's shock is replaced by dark suspicion in an instant. "What are you doing here?"

Her pink lips part as she lifts a plastic cup to her mouth. She wants to seem casual. Nonchalant.

But I know that she's feeling what I'm feeling.

Being this close again stirs up bad emotions. Bad memories.

It's been two years since I was this close to her. Now, seeing her face in detail again, I'm reminded of everything I've purposefully forgotten.

And how much I hate it. Hate her.

I hate those glossy lips. That deft pink tongue. The soft, creamy skin of her cheeks, her neck, her tits.

I step towards her and swat her drink to the ground. The liquid inside spills over the leaves and splatters on our legs.

"What the fu-?" she gasps.

When she sees the look on my face, the curse dies on her lips.

Now, she's scared.

Terrified, actually. As she should be.

I can see it in her gray green eyes. In the way they dart to my face and then the area surrounding us.

We are far away from the general party area.

And even if we weren't, there's enough debauchery out here that a couple shouts would go unnoticed.

No one is coming to save you from me, Penny.

"You fucked up," I announce.

She frowns. "What are you talking about?"

Her chin is raised defiantly.

But there's no mistaking the fear in her voice.

I give her a cold grin. "You knew the rules of our deal. And you broke it. There's a price to be paid for that."

She presses her back against the tree, even though there's nowhere for her to go.

I've had her in this position before. Years ago.

But this is different. Much, much different.

Penny swallows, her pale throat bobbing. "I didn't break any rules. I didn't do anything. Please just let me go."

I shake my head. "Not a fucking chance. Actions have consequences, Penny."

Her lip is trembling now. "You're the one who came and found me. I didn't do anything."

She presses a hand to my chest to push me back.

Bad move.

I wrap my hand around her wrist. In an instant, her arm is pinned above her head and our bodies are pressed together.

Her breath catches. I don't miss the way she leans towards me, rather than away.

Some habits are hard to break.

We haven't been this close in a long time, but her body remembers.

God knows mine does, too.

Shoving my face right in hers, I hiss, "For two years, I've been content to leave you alone. As long as you did the same for me. But you violated that truce. So I'm done keeping my distance. I'm going to be a part of your life again, Penny. But not in a good way. Not in a nice way. I'm going to make you hurt. Make you suffer. And I won't quit until I've ruined you completely."

Silence. The longest silence of her life, I'm sure.

I don't blink. Don't look away.

I want her to see how much I mean what I'm saying.

"Why are you doing this?" she whispers in a tight, choked voice. "What did I do?"

I sigh. My answer is a single word: "Haley."

Caleb had come to me a few weeks ago when Penny's campaign of bullying against Haley was at its worst. He wanted me to try and do something to help her.

"You know Penny," he said. "Tell her to back off."

I used to know Penny. I sure as fuck don't anymore. I shut that door and locked it a long time ago.

I told him he was on his own.

But tonight, I've changed my mind. Caleb is my brother-in-arms, and Haley is his woman. That means protecting her is my responsibility, too.

That's why I'm here.

To tell Penny to stay in her fucking lane.

Or else I'll be forced to intervene in more damaging ways.

Penny's jaw shifts to one side and she clicks her teeth in annoyance. Her breath huffs out, making her chest heave.

When she speaks again, she uses her usual sassy bitch tone. Her Queen Bee voice.

"Why do you care about her? I thought she belonged to Caleb. Is he sharing? Based on the stupid grin he has been wearing and your perpetual frown, I'd guess not. Then again, you've never really been one for smiles."

She's trying to assert control of the situation.

But she's not in charge here. I'm not one of the stupid bimbos she calls friends.

I'm the one calling the shots now.

I ignore her question, mostly because I know it will bother her.

"When shit hit the fan between us, I told you to stay out of my life. Haley's part of my life." Her eyes narrow, but I continue. "Leave her the fuck alone."

I let go of her arm, and Penny spins away from me, brushing her hands down the front of her jeans as though she can erase the memory of our bodies touching.

When she stands tall again, her legs are spread and her arms are crossed, making her cleavage even more noticeable.

But I refuse to be distracted. I keep my eyes locked on hers.

"Is that why I don't hear any rumors about who you're with, Noah? Because you're slumming?"

Her voice sounds desperate, nasally and a bit higher pitched. The same way mothers have a telephone voice, Penny seems to have an I'm being a bitch voice.

"I knew you Golden Boys did everything together, but I didn't know you did everyone together, too."

"No one gives a shit what kind of rumors you try to make up, Penny. Trying harder will only make things worse for you."

Her eyes go molten. "I think you care a lot what people think."

We are only a few feet apart, the dark of the forest pressing in on all sides, making the distance feel simultaneously shorter and longer.

It feels like we are in a black hole, separate from the rest of the universe, being sucked towards one another.

And, fuck, it pisses me off.

I've spent two years purging my life of this bitch and all it takes is one conversation for all that work to be undone.

But what I want from Penny now is different from what I once wanted.

Now, I want to make her suffer.

To make her miserable.

To make her pay.

I want to make her feel the way I feel every time I see her swaying down the hallway, sneering and rude.

The time has come to do unto others as has been done unto me. It may not be the golden rule exactly, but it's this Golden Boy's rule.

"You're right about that, Penny," I say lightly. "I do care. About you especially." I lower my chin and move towards her, biting my lower lip. "You have no idea how much I care."

The cold mask slips. Her eyes are wide, long lashes batting against her flushed cheeks.

"You do?" she asks, confused.

Penny is used to being admired and worshipped. Men bend over backwards for her because she has a body that fits just right in your hands and a mouth that promises unspeakable things without ever saying a word.

So, of course, she thinks I still care about her.

She doesn't know any different.

But, oh, how she's about to learn.

"I care that you're happy," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. "Especially since you shouldn't be."

Her face falls.

"You don't deserve the grace I've extended the last two years by ignoring you," I spit. "All the pain you've caused other people, you deserve to have handed back to you ten-fold."

"I haven't done anything," she stammers. "Noah, you know I didn't do-"

I wave a hand to dismiss her. "I'll see you around. That's a promise." Then I turn and leave.

"Noah!"

My name on her lips is still enough to make me stop in my tracks.

But it isn't enough to change my mind.

Penny has had her fun.

Now, it's time for me to have mine.

3

PENNY

What the actual fuck just happened?

Two years.

Two entire years since Noah Boone has so much as breathed in my direction, and now he storms back into my life, pins me against a tree, and makes threats?

This has got to be a fever dream. Lord knows he still features in them from time to time no matter how hard I fight my subconscious on the matter.

Though, usually, he's younger in my dreams. So am I.

The way we were back when things were different.

In those dreams, we're young. Freshmen. I giggle and he wears a smile, and it's always innocent. Just sitting together and talking. And laughing.

I shake my head in a desperate attempt to clear it. Now is not the time for this.

I left the main party because I needed a minute. A minute to slouch against a tree, stop sucking in my stomach, and, honestly, fix the permanent wedgie my silk thong causes.

Did Noah see me do that?

My face burns with the possibility, but it doesn't matter. If Noah's threat is to be taken seriously, he's going to do a lot worse than tell people he saw me pull my panties out of my ass.

He's played it cool the last few years, but I know what Noah and the Golden Boys are capable of.

Everybody does.

If you cross them, you die.

I kick the cup Noah slapped out of my hands into the bush. I told Anika to bring trash bags, but she spent the afternoon getting a spray tan no one would be able to see in the dark woods and forgot to do it. Classic.

Noah walked off in the opposite direction of the party, but I still catch myself looking for him as I pick my way back through the maze of branches and human bodies.

A couple that clearly started beneath a tree to the right of the path have gyrated their way off the blanket they laid out to the center of the path. I actually have to kick the guy in the ribs to get him to move.