My knees settle on either side of him as I keep myself raised in the air, leaving a frustrating distance between our bodies.

Dustin leans back, his brows lifting in question. “ You are quite daring, Lady Lana. ”

“ How do you expect me not to sway when you are touching me like that, Your Highness? ” I blurt, placing my hand on the headrest and leaning back. “ I am your mate, after all. I can not resist— ”

His hand shoots out and takes hold of my nape. He brings me down and closer to his face as a storm brews behind his eyes.

~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~

After getting betrayed, and killed by her so-called mate, Elita Folke should have been a goner. But when she wakes up in Lana Redley’s body, a decade back in time, she just knows what needs to be done. Her one goal in life is to change fate for the Alpha King and avenge herself. But the Alpha King, Dustin Landric is not what she imagined. He is mysterious, dangerous, Lana’s enemy and most of all so handsome that Elita loses her mind every time she comes across him. Or why else would she jump his bones on their first meeting?

~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~

Standalone Book 4 of Wolfverse Series

Book 1: Omega for the Alpha King (Standalone)

Book 2: Forbidden for the Alpha King (Standalone)

Book 3: Mated to the Enemy Alpha King (Standalone)

Book 4: Changing Fate for the Alpha King (Standalone)

Prologue

Elita

I was the last surviving werewolf in the world—a fate worse than death.

Once, the werewolves and Lycan Kings ruled the lands. We were united, powerful, and unstoppable.

Now, I walked alone among the land of the savage vampires and cruel humans.

It was my betrayal that ended our rule and destroyed my race until I was the sole survivor of the war that wiped out everyone.

But I didn’t regret what I did to end up here, in a world where the history of Lycans and werewolves was long forgotten.

Because I had him.

Levian Seisti, the original vampire, and a man who I thought was my mate.

He loved me, or that’s what I believed. He said he was my destiny and so, I followed him blindly even when I never felt the connection with him.

Until…he turned his back on me and my illusion shattered.

The vampires and humans were now hunting me down, to end the legacy of werewolves, to end me.

I ran and pleaded with everyone I knew. I waited for Levian to come to save me. I prayed to the Moon Goddess to spare my life, something I never thought I would do again.

I had to survive and find the one thing that was promised to me. I had to bring them back from the dead.

But my desperation was in vain, my prayers went unanswered, and the man who claimed to love me was nowhere to be found.

And then…

I realized what it was like to be the only one of your kind. A werewolf alone in a world full of vampires and humans was doomed to meet a fate fit for a sinner.

As time ran short, I found myself in front of the only stone sculpture left of the Lycan King who once ruled the land. Lycan King Dustin Landric.

I didn’t know why I kept the location of that sculpture hidden all those years, but as I looked at the features of the man who was long gone, I was reminded of what he said to me in his last moments.

“ You will regret it, Elita. ”

I couldn’t remember what his voice was like anymore. I couldn’t remember his face and only knew him from the sculpture that was left behind as the memory of the man once loved by everyone.

In my desperate moments, I had tried to find comfort in the dead, in the stone that couldn’t turn back to a man again.

And then the vampires and humans found me.

As they drained me of my blood…

As they ripped my limbs and burned me at the stake…

As I saw my so-called mate becoming part of the crowd that took my life…

I was filled with a coldness so strong that it froze me amidst the rage of fire.

When pain spread, and my life hung by a thread, I kept my eyes on the stone. Dustin Landric.

When his words echoed in my ears again, I accepted the truth…

He was right.

I regretted it.

If I had another chance, I would never betray him and become the end of my kind.

And the people who now laughed at my burning body would pay for the pain they caused me.

In my final moments, as the flames consumed me, I vowed that I would return if there was any justice in this world or the next as I stared at the cold stone.

And when I did, the world will remember the power and fury of the werewolves. They will remember me.

Elita Folke.

The end to a rule, and the beginning of a new era.

1

Elita

“ No! ” I scream and sit up.

It feels like I am still burning. I rub my arms and my face, trying to extinguish the fire but it keeps aching and itching.

“ Is it my punishment? Am I in hell, to burn for an eternity? ” I cry out, looking around the dark room.

The walls are closing in on me and I can’t breathe. My whole life flashes before my eyes, and I am stuck at the point where the Lycan King was murdered before my eyes years ago.

That’s when everything started going downhill, that’s how the werewolves lost against the vampires and humans in the war.

If I had not become the reason for the death of the Lycan King, the werewolves would still be here.

At the fading memory of his face in my mind, tears slide down my cheeks. He died because of me, yet I can’t even remember what his eyes looked like in that last moment of his life.

Until now, it didn’t hurt. But now, all that’s left is a gaping hole in my heart that is filling with regret for what I did.

Suddenly, a door creaks open, and bright light filters inside the dark room. Instinctively, I cover my face with my arms.

“ Is it time for me to face the Goddess? ” I wonder, mumbling between my fingers.

I wouldn’t be surprised if I get thrown into hell for an eternity because my sins are unmatched in the history of wolves and Lycans.

“ Lana, why don’t you come out and apologize to your father already? You can tell him that you don’t want Maverick anymore. Why are you holding onto a man who betrayed you for some money? ” An unfamiliar voice draws closer, and my body stiffens.

Lana?

Who is Lana?

A hand touches my elbow. I jump in my spot, my nose sniffing the scent of the lady.

The world freezes around me. This…can’t be possible.

Werewolf!

My head snaps up to meet a pair of dull blue eyes. The color drains from my face as I find myself staring at the elderly, soft face in complete shock.

“ I got a news about Maverick. He is already taking another woman as his mate and yet here you are, getting punished for not wanting to give him up. ” She is scolding me, I realize and her old face is filled with frustration.

She is wearing a blue, casual embroidered dress. It’s an old fashion that died with the werewolves and Lycans.

Lifting my weak hand, I poke her finger touching me. I gasp, instantly covering my mouth with the back of my hand.

She feels real!

“ I could have supported you if he was loyal to you but he tainted your image, then dumped you and took money from your father! Do you not understand that your reputation is ruined because of him? Who would want a mate who ran away from home? ” She shakes my elbow, breaking me out of the trance.

“ I…ran away from home? ” I yelp at my voice. It’s feminine and soft, unlike my rough voice.

“ Lana. ” The woman before me gasps and cups my face. “ what’s wrong? Have you fallen sick in here? ”

“ Maybe. ” I mumble. Maybe, it’s all a dream.

No! It is a DREAM.

The woman pulls me to my wobbly feet and drags me out of what I assume is the dungeon.

My mouth gapes at the big mansion I am inside. It all feels so real, the high ceilings, the golden and white setup.

We pass by a mirror, and I come to a halt. My face…

I touch my dirty cheeks, and then run my hands down the rest of my body. A beautiful woman with blonde hair and blue eyes is staring back at me.

It’s not my face, and not my body.

A scream erupts from my mouth as I step closer to the mirror and inspect myself with a fiery urgency.

Why am I inside someone else’s body?

What kind of dream is this?

“ Lana! ” The woman screams behind me and touches the back of my head. “ Why didn’t I notice this before? Oh, my Goddess! There is a lot of dried blood on the back of your head. ”

I cringe, dropping my gaze to my aching wrists. The blood is not only on the back of my head. My wrists are sliced and the blood has dried over my skin.

It looks like the girl I am seeing in the mirror did this to herself.

“ Why are you not healing? Is it because your father fed you silver? ” She cries out, rushing me into a room, and pushing me onto a bed.

I can’t take my eyes off my wrists. This girl…whoever is it…she slit her wrists in my dream.

What kind of punishment can this be? I wonder.

I remain seated on the bed, numb and confused. People rush in and out of the room, inspecting my head, checking my wrists, and offering me food and water.

They are all werewolves. Most smell like omega but one or two even have stronger scents like that of warriors.

Why did I end up here? I sigh.

I was on that stake, burning like a punished witch, and then everything went black.

As I think about the past, Levian’s cold eyes flash before my mind, and pain spreads in my heart. I double over, clutching my chest and heaving a deep breath.

I died.

Why does it still hurt?

Is this the hell everyone talked about?

I have this weird feeling in my gut that things didn’t end when I died. I met someone after that. It was a woman.

The face of that woman is hazy in my memory, but I can sense the warmth that radiated from her.

Then, I was pushed away from that light and into the darkness where Lana resided.

I pick up my head. My throat clogs and I am crying before I can register it.

It’s a dream but…I don’t want it to end.

This must be hell but it feels better than heaven.

The werewolves are alive. There are no signs of war with the vampires and humans.

“ What will I do with you, Lana? How could you attempt to end your life? ” The same woman is crying beside me, her fingers softly grazing my bandaged wrists.

“ Don’t…cry. ” I sniffle.

Seeing her in this state, I wonder why I am Lana in this hell. Is she someone who died a miserable death because of me?

“ I will talk to your father. He will not send you to the ball at the castle. He will not arrange for you to get selected by the Lycan King as his mate, I promise. ” The woman sobs, looking at me with teary, warmth-filled eyes.

I don’t understand what she is talking about, but…

What the hell?

The selection?

That happened almost a decade ago!

A bulb lights inside my head. “ Lycan King…Dustin? ”

“ I know you don’t want this and I will do my best— ”

Without listening to what she has to say or what offers she might make, I get up and run out of the room. She is right behind me, calling out the name ‘Lana’.

I run wildly. I run until my lungs burn. I run until I can recognize my surroundings.

I know the ways. They are etched into my memory. I know this pack. I know this world.

Many people are after me, still asking me to stop, to consider my condition.

I am dizzy, and panting and aching everywhere.

And then it comes into my view.

The giant castle that sits atop the rocks. Wolveshire Citadel. Home to the man who died because of me and the man I once betrayed.

Everything can be a dream, but this place can not be.

The moment I see the castle, and sense a dominant power behind the walls, I drop on my knees.

My desperation was not in vain.

I am alive. In someone else’s body, but I am here, in a world where the Lycan Kings and werewolves still rule. In the world that belongs to me.

I am not the last surviving werewolf in this world now.

He is still there. And as long as he lives, the vampires or humans will never win.

“ Lady Lana. ” A man comes up behind me and seizes my arms. “ Come back with us. ”

My heart pounds in my chest wildly, as I stare at the castle. Everything inside me is thrumming with bittersweet emotions.

I open my quivering mouth and whisper. “ You will not die this time, Dustin Landric. ”

And then I am crying. I am wailing. I am mourning the years I spent in my previous life, the loneliness, the guilt.

The pain is endless, and it doesn’t leave me for a long time.

2

Elita

“ You will attend the selection Ball. Don’t try to run away again or you will have no legs in the future. ” The strict, angry Alpha on the other side of the desk hisses. “ If you serve me no purpose, you have no right to be alive! ”

I blink, staring at him. He heaves a heavy breath and holds my gaze before a look of confusion takes over.

His features match the face of the body I am inside. Blue eyes. Blonde hair.

He is my father.

I mean…the father of this body, Lana Redley. He is Alpha Redley, a powerful Alpha in the North who can influence even the Lycan King of the North, Dustin Landric into doing things for him.

According to my information, he fed his daughter silver which is deadly enough to kill a wolf, even if it’s an Alpha’s daughter.

Something inside my chest burns at the thought. I shouldn’t be angry because I am not Lana but fearing him and despising him is like…muscle memory of this body.

When I don’t say anything, his frown deepens. “ Why are you not replying to me? ”

“ Alpha, I believe Lady Lana is suffering from memory issues because of her head injury. She doesn’t remember…anything about her life, it seems. ” The elderly woman is behind me and comes to my rescue when I don’t waver.

She was shocked when I asked who she was. Since then, she has been coming up with weird explanations to understand why ‘Lana’ doesn’t remember the Nanny who took care of her all her life.

In the end, she has reached the conclusion that Lana lost her memory. And it’s stupid, which Alpha Redley proves the next moment.

“ A wolf? She?! ” He points at me, his face a mask of wrath and mockery. “ lost her memory?! ”

“ Alpha, the silver must have weakened her abilities too much. Or it’s possible that Lana lost her memory because of the heartbreak. She had to break her bond with her mate, Maverick after all. You know breaking a bond or rejecting mates can cause such issues. ” She provides while I sit there, still reeling with the shock of being here.

Alpha Redley fixes his gaze on me and stares at me for a long time, silently. I stare back, making him scowl and stiffen, and shift in his spot numerous times.

“ Is it true what Donna is saying or is this another one of your tricks? ” He asks, leaning in.

I watch his clenching fists and tightening jaw, a strange emotion stirring in my heart.

“ Do you hit me? ” I wonder, not realizing that I said it out loud.

His eyes narrow on me and in an instant, he is standing before me, seething like an angry wolf.

I pride myself on my identity as a supreme warrior, an Alpha’s blood, and—

His palm strikes my cheek before I can register it. The impact is so strong that my chair flies, and lands on the floor.

I find myself lying there, staring at the ceiling with my blurry vision, shock, and pain ripping throughout my body.

Why didn’t I see him moving? My instincts are so sharpened that I can even track down vampires that are known for their speed, so why didn’t I see his palm coming?

A mixture of anger and disbelief makes me jump to my feet, only to get another slap in the face that knocks me down. My vision goes black, my head buzzing with the brutal hit.

An Alpha’s punch is no joke. It’s like my jaw has dislocated.

But I am an Alpha’s daughter and I am trained by an Original Hybrid personally.

I fist my hands, wanting to fight back, but my wolf’s claws don’t come out. Surprised, I open and close my fists, trying to understand why I don’t hear my wolf’s voice in my head or why she is not coming out.

Freaking hell!

Where is my wolf?

The angry bull kicks my thigh. I groan, and close my eyes in pain. This is nothing compared to what I suffered, to the pain of getting burned alive or getting your limbs ripped.

But…this is killing me.

How did I become so weak?

“ Answer me?! Are you lying or have you truly become dumb? ” Alpha Redley snarls, pressing the heel of his boot harder into my thigh.

After years of suppressed memories, my father’s face comes back to haunt me. He loved to do things like this, beat us siblings until we were half dead.

He could do that because he was an Alpha. We were not. We were just innocent children.

During my time in that hellhole that I called my pack, I learned that if you are weak, you must not use your fists but your wits. You must bid your time and stab someone in their sleep instead of fighting heads on.

I grit my jaw and nod instantly. “ Yes, Father. ”

“ Alpha! ” He barks like a dog.

“ Yes, Alpha. ” I hiss through my gritted jaw.

He kicks my leg and leaves me on the floor. I release a breath of relief.

Lana Redley…fucked me up.

She has no wolf.

She can not fight.

And in her body, I am as weak as she is.

“ How is this possible? She lost her memory with a blow to her head! ” He paces in the office angrily and I sit on the floor, wondering when he might lash out again.

Suddenly, he proves me right and stops in front of me. “ Look at me! ”

I flinch, meeting his gaze. He glares into my eyes and grabs my jaw, squeezing it until I wince but don’t look away.

“ It’s true. This is not my daughter. She would never look into my eyes. ” He blinks, releasing my aching jaw in shock.

My heart misses a beat as I rub my face and look down. He can’t figure out that I am Elita, right?

I frown. There is no way to know that. No one has ever heard of a soul going back in time to possess another she-wolf. That’s just…absurd.

Which brings me to the question…

How did I do this?

And what are my conditions?

Is Lana alive inside me and I am only possessing her body?

Or is she dead?

And why the hell is it Lana?

I gasp with each question as the possible answers to all of them make me shift uncomfortably.

“ Well! Very well. ” Out of nowhere, Alpha Redley chuckles.

“ Alpha… ” The kind woman whispers, and steps closer. “ I think it’s best if Lana takes some— ”

“ Silence! ” Alpha Redley growls, his eyes flashing a brighter blue.

I grimace, sliding a little back. I don’t think Lana’s weak body will survive another blow and after coming so far, I can’t just fall dead so easily.

I must come up with a way to make up for Lana’s weaknesses.

“ Listen here, girl. ” He turns to me and snatches my jaw again.

“ Yes, Alpha. ” I blurt, my heart missing a beat.

I already hate this man.

“ You must attend the ceremony at the castle tonight. Alpha King is looking for his fated mate and has called women from all over the four Kingdoms of Wolves. ” He leans in and glares at me hatefully. “ You must make him believe you are his mate. ”

I open my mouth, to tell him what a terrible idea it is. How can I make him believe I am his mate? Because I, Elita Folke am not his mate, and Lana Redley already rejected her mate.

But instead, I ask him. “ How am I going to make him believe that, Alpha? ”

Protecting the Lycan King from up close is a great idea.

And I must prevent the fall of the werewolves and Lycans as well.

Because I am powerful now as I know what even the Lycan Kings don’t.

The vampires and humans are coming for them soon.

All that aside…

I must see my stone sculpture turn into a living, breathing man.

3

Elita

I stare at the vial in my hand and grimace. It is a bright red liquid which is warm to touch.

As I stare at it, Alpha Redley’s stern words echo in my ears.

‘ All you have to do is to drink this potion right before you meet the King. It will attract him to you and he won’t be able to hold himself back. He will mistake these effects for a mate bond. ’

I sigh, hiding the small bottle in my right palm. It’s a Love Potion, that’s all Alpha Redley should have said. But I don’t think he is aware of the whole fiasco this potion can cause.

Once I drink it, every man around me will become a lovesick puppy and will pounce on me like an animal if I don’t use it properly.

I hum. Maybe, Alpha Redley knew that but just didn’t care to tell me. He is fine as long as Dustin is among those love-sick puppies.

“ Lady Lana, stop pouting. ” Donna scolds, and grabs my chin to pull my lips apart. “ It doesn’t suit an Alpha’s daughter to pout. ”

I blink and shake my face out of her hold. She frowns at me but doesn’t say anything. She doesn’t want to ruin my mood when we are inside a carriage, traveling to the Wolveshite Citadel, to attend the ceremony.

Silently, I glance down at the heavy light blue gown I am wearing. The dress is tight around my chest and waist, but is loose around my hips and legs, giving my upper body a feminine look.

It’s clear that I am supposed to seduce the Alpha King tonight. They can not make it more obvious.

I grit my jaw, the inner conflict starting to haunt me again. Can I really fool an Alpha King? What if he catches on and hangs me to death before I even get to do what’s needed?

With that thought in mind, a lump lodges in my throat. My fist clenches harder around the vial.

I will not die before seeing my siblings. Eden, my little sister, and Eben, my little brother. Both were so innocent and young. But…the world was not merciful to us orphans.

It’s strange that I don’t remember the happy moments of my life, but I do remember the blood that I saw, the fire that burned everything, the war that took them from me.

My eyes snap open and I suppress a gasp as pain hits my chest.

They won’t die.

Not again.

“ Do you still miss Maverick, Lana? ” Donna whispers.

I snap my head in her direction and shake my head. I don’t even know…who this Maverick is.

“ Then why are you crying? ” She reaches out to me and grabs my hand.

I touch my cheek with my fingers. They are wet. I just…can’t stop crying. I just…never imagined being in the same world as my family again.

“ I am going to…win this war. ” I whisper, earning a chuckle from Donna.

“ This is not a war, Lana. ”

“ It is… ” I nod to myself and lean back. “ for me, every day is a war now. ”

Silence prevails for a moment. Then Donna speaks up in a hesitant voice.

“ Do you…remember what your father wants by getting you to mate with the Alpha King? ”

Curiosity peaks as I shake my head. “ I can’t remember anything. ”

Donna glances around as if she is scared someone will hear us. I sit up straight and stare at her.

“ Once you get inside the castle and become a part of Alpha King’s life, you are expected to spy on him and tell your father everything. ” She leans in and whispers in a low voice. “ You must…give your father necessary intel so he can get rid of the Alpha King soon. ”

My shoulders stiffen and anger surges forth. “ get rid of who? ”

“ Alpha King already suspects your father of treason, Lana. He will not go easy on you even if he is under the influence of this spell. ” She continues, without noticing the changing color of my face or the shifting look in my eyes. “ He will make life hell for you. He knows you will be your father’s spy. So you must be careful when you become a part of his life. Don’t get hurt. Anyway, you only have to keep the act up for a few months and then we can get the King out of the way so stay away from him. ”

I end up laughing. Donna looks at me like I have lost my mind, and that must be it. I am freaking losing my mind!

“ Does he want to kill the Alpha King? ” I stop laughing and hiss.

“ Shh, Lana. ” She slams her hand over my mouth to shut me up. “ we don’t say that out loud. Ears are everywhere. We have been careful until now— ”

“ Nevermind. Killing him is…kind of impossible for you people. And Alpha Redley knows that. So maybe, he doesn’t care if his daughter gets slaughtered. ” I interrupt, so she can stop talking.

Oh, well.

What now?

I bite my thumb, anxiety rearing its head inside me. Oh, no. Oh, shit.

Did Moon Goddess send me into Lana Redley’s body because she knows Lana is going to get killed by Dustin for being a traitor?

It’s not a miracle for me but a chance for Dustin to get his revenge on me? I caused his death in the past, so he can kill me in this life. We will be even then.

I stop biting my thumb and go still.

Wait a moment!

The world seems to go still just like me but my heart is running. Why did I not…think of it before?

In history, Dustin hosted several selection ceremonies but never recognized anyone as his mate. And there is no mention of Lana Redley in history.

This means…Lana died before the war.

And Dustin never chose a mate.

Does this mean I am going to die tonight?

4

Elita

Does this mean I am going to die tonight?

“ Oh, shit! ” I blurt. “ I am damned. ”

“ Lana! What language is this? We are already here. Refrain from saying such words. ” Donna whisper-yells but I can not focus on that anymore.

I am walking to my death.

I wince, as I am literally forced down the carriage by Donna.

She pushes me in the direction of the open gates of the Wolveshire Citadel. “ Go on! Best of luck! ”

I take a step forward, preparing myself to face the inevitable.

“ And Lana?! ” Donna calls me out again.

My trance breaks as I hum, not in the mood to reply to her.

“ If Alpha King is anywhere close to killing you, just remind him that you are Nora’s best friend. ” She chimes as if that fact alone can save me from death.

“ Who is this Nora? ” I wonder, completely dumbfounded.

But I receive no answer. When I glance over my shoulder, the carriage is already gone.

I stand there and stare at the bright, golden decorations from afar until a warrior comes to lead me inside the Grand Hall.

My memories clash with my reality as I recall myself walking among the ruins of this magnificent castle.

I twirl around, eyeing the golden chandeliers, the white, blue, and golden decorations. My heart soars, as I take in the sea of girls, of guards, of servers.

The smiling faces. The nervous stances. The laughter.

All these people…

They died because of me.

Regret overwhelms me and suddenly, even while standing among the crowd, I feel like I am alone—Just the lone, filthy wolf they called me.

In my mind, I see everyone turning towards me and asking me why must they die because of my foolishness. And I have no answer to that. I can’t explain why I tricked the Alpha King and brought him to his death.

I stagger a step back but the loud cheers bring me back to my senses.

“ His Highness has arrived. ” A girl screams in excitement, her voice shrill and disturbing.

My breath hitches, and I find myself becoming a stone statue as my head turns in the direction of the stairs.

He is not here yet. But he is coming.

Now the mission [Changing Fate for the Alpha King] is on.

I open the bottle and down the liquid, as others stare in the direction of the stairs, like me. The lights in the Grand Hall suddenly become brighter as the bitter liquid burns down my throat.

And then I see him. His long, thick legs clad in black pants, the blue shirt tight around his lean torso, the black jacket with sparkling blue embroidery. Slowly, my eyes travel higher, to his covered, broad shoulders, to his Adam’s apple.

An itch starts in my hands and my palms sweat. Suddenly, I feel like I am burning from the inside out, like my guts are getting scorched and I can no longer stand still.

He is walking down the stairs, his stance that of a lazy predator but so commanding that there is no ignoring the shift in the air. People stand straighter, hold their breath, keep their eyes on him.

The stone sculpture flashes before my eyes and my gaze lifts to his similar sharp jawline, his thick lips that part just slightly, and his proud nose.

My heartbeat picks its pace, and the bottle drops to the floor. An odd, unbearable urge takes over me—an urge to meet his gaze right away.

But…I am already breathless.

He is here. In the same world—no—the same room as me. Just a few steps away.

I wait, just a moment longer, to calm myself, to prepare myself to see what the eyes of this man look like.

Then, I look up.

Our gazes collide, and my breath whooshes out of my lungs. His eyes are a dark color, the color of a midnight sky on a clear night.

The urge to look into his eyes shifts into something more primal. I am being pulled towards the tall man, the dangerous Alpha King like I am the other half of the magnet that he is.

Before I register my move, I am already standing before him, taking him in from so close. His mesmerizing eyes follow me, a frown etching between his thick brows.

He is…beautiful. So much better than his sculpture.

And I…

I can not stop myself.

What the hell are you doing, Lana? Elita?!

The primal instinct takes over, and I lose control of my limbs as I lift myself on my toes and my lips smash over his parted mouth.

Sparks explode behind my eyes, and gasps erupt all around me, but I grab his collar and pull his head down to deepen the kiss.