Chapter 4
Gerard's yelling jerked Nadine awake.
She latched onto my shirt, bawling.
She was still so tiny—her cries barely made a sound, but damn, they hurt.
I rocked her, whispering nonsense, hoping it'd help.
Gerard? Just stood there, arms crossed, looking like I was the problem.
Then Peggy called.
"Honey, when are you coming back? The food sucked. I want your cooking."
Like magic, his whole vibe changed.
"Babe, what do you want? I'll hit the store now."
He started listing dishes, then grabbed his coat and dipped.
Outside, rain was coming down hard.
He walked straight into it, umbrella up, all in for Peggy.
I stayed behind, holding our crying kid, shivering as the cold seeped in.
***
After the party, Peggy stopped me, all smug, waving her phone.
She couldn't figure out why I looked shaken when she called Gerard earlier.
She unlocked her profile and tilted the screen toward me.
"Danielle, what was that look for? Don't tell me you didn't know Gerard and I have been together for almost two years?"
I didn't answer. Couldn't.
She rolled her eyes and shoved her phone in my face.
"So what if you have a kid? You still couldn't keep his heart!"
Her feed? A Gerard highlight reel.
Every post screamed 'he's mine.'
Two years ago:
[Finally got the guy I like! Chased him forever. He only told me he liked me too after he said yes.]
While I was pregnant:
[Boyfriend kept rubbing my belly today. I asked if I was getting fat—he kissed me and said no. Then, teary-eyed, he asked when we'd have a baby of our own. I told him I was scared, and he said we didn't have to.]
Four months ago—two months after Nadine was born:
[He brought up having kids again. I pouted and said I didn't want to give birth, just wanted to play with a baby. Then he actually brought one to me! But that's when I realized, it's not just babies I like—I want a baby that's ours.]
I bit my lip so hard it split.
With blurry eyes, I tapped open the photo from Peggy's last post. My chest caved in.
Nadine—my sweet, carefully watched-over Nadine—had been snatched by Gerard and handed to Peggy behind my back.
In the pic, Peggy was holding a flower to her nose. Nadine's skin? Covered in red splotches.
Heart racing, I pulled Nadine close. Guilt and panic clawed at me. Sleep was out of the question.
That damn bouquet from Gerard? It triggered the same rash—red dots flaring up everywhere.
It hit fast. She was already wheezing.
Her face was puffing up. I gave her her meds, but they weren't working.
I bolted out, half-blind with fear, searching for Raphael.
"Mrs. Busch, Mr. Busch has ordered that you are not to leave the house at night."
Chapter 5
No going out at night.
That rule? Only for me.
Gerard could sneak off to Peggy at 2 a.m. and no one blinked.
I bit down hard, tears streaming.
"Raphael, look at her—she's having a real reaction. She needs a hospital. Please, just take us. We'll come right back, I swear."
I was about to drop to my knees.
But Raphael? Cold as stone.
He blocked the door like a robot and told me to ask Gerard.
I called. Again. And again.
Each one declined.
When someone finally picked up, it wasn't Gerard.
"Danielle, do you even know what time it is? Can you not? If it's so important, wait till Gerard wakes up."
Peggy.
Already hanging up.
I screamed and begged, lowering my voice as much as I could. "Peggy, please. Wake him up. My daughter's having a severe allergic reaction. Just ask him to let Raphael drive us to the hospital."
"Hospital?" she snorted. "Danielle, don't think playing the pitiful mom card is gonna win Gerard over. He loves me."
I was begging now. "Peggy, I know. I'm not trying to change that. I just need to save my daughter. She's really not okay."
She paused, then shrugged like it was nothing.
"It's just an allergy. She's not gonna die. I've seen her like that before—give it two hours. And even if Gerard did wake up, he wouldn't leave me for you. Bye."
Click.
***
Gerard didn't care.
Outside, rain pounded the windows while I knotted sheets and curtains into a makeshift rope, tied it to the bedframe, and climbed down with Nadine in my arms.
It was pitch black.
I hit the ground hard, twisting my ankle on a rock.
Didn't matter. I limped toward the road, pain screaming with every step.
When I finally stumbled into the hospital, soaked and shaking, a doctor took one look at Nadine and froze.
"Emergency team—get ready!"
A crowd of adults rushed off with my baby, barely ten pounds, straight into surgery.
The OR light blinked on—then off way too soon.
The same doctor came back out, eyes heavy.
"Ms. Astor, she was brought in too late. Honestly... she might've already been gone before you even got here."
His lips kept moving, but I didn't hear a thing.
Just this sharp ringing in my ears and the unbearable weight crashing down on my chest.
Then nothing.
I passed out, and the doctors scrambled to catch me.
When I finally came to, the pain hit like a freight train—raw, relentless.
Nadine was gone.
Out of habit, I reached for my phone to text Gerard.
But the second I opened the app, Peggy's new post smacked me in the face.
[I'm pregnant! Just thinking about it makes me nervous. Good thing my boyfriend banned me from drinking—I almost hurt you, little one.]
[Welcome to the world, my baby. Daddy and I have been waiting so long for you.]
Chapter 6
My baby was gone—while Peggy was pregnant with the child Gerard actually wanted.
It felt like my chest was being crushed from the inside.
Barely keeping it together, I signed the death certificate, then took Nadine to be cremated.
She was already so small. Now, she was nothing but ash in a palm-sized urn.
That was all I had left.
I stumbled back home in a haze.
Gerard's father, Christopher was on the couch.
He started to say something, then froze when he saw what I was holding.
"Wh-What happened?"
A while later, Gerard walked in. Peggy, of course, was right behind him.
***
Peggy waltzed in like it was a meet-and-greet.
"Mr. Busch, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Peggy Madoff."
Christopher's face dropped. He turned to Gerard, voice tight.
"Gerard, where have you been? Do you have any idea that Nadine, she..."
He was about to say it—about to say Nadine had died.
But Gerard was too busy fussing over Peggy, guiding her to the couch like she was made of glass.
In the process, he bumped the table.
Nadine's urn hit the floor.
Shattered.
Ash spilled out, scattered everywhere.
I froze.
Then everything inside me snapped.
I walked up and slapped Peggy—hard.
Gerard instantly jumped in front of her and shoved me hard. I hit the floor.
"Danielle, are you insane? It's just some broken jar—why are you freaking out? Do you even care Peggy's pregnant? If anything happens to her, I won't forgive you!"
His fists clenched, eyes burning with warning.
Peggy pressed closer to him, fake sweet.
"Gerard, your dad's right here. Don't fight with Danielle because of me. I'm pregnant—of course she's upset. Let her take it out on me."
Gerard's knuckles cracked.
He grabbed me by the collar, dragged me to my feet.
"What right do you have to be angry? I'm telling you—get on your knees and apologize to Peggy. Or else—"
Christopher cut him off. Voice like ice.
Then—crack.
A slap that echoed.
"Gerard, how the hell did I raise such a disgrace of a son? Do you even know what was in that urn? That was your own daughter's ashes! Nadine is dead!"