Chapter 5
The terrace doors were propped open when Laila stepped out, and the cold hit her bare shoulders like a compliment. Nobody watched a woman step outside for air. That was the whole trick of it — do the thing that looks the most human, and no one questions why you're doing it alone.
She crossed to the far railing, the one that curved above the marble staircase, and knelt like she was fixing the strap of her heel. The multi-tool was small enough to hide in her palm, small enough that her publicist, Victor, had laughed when she'd asked him to source one that wouldn't show through satin. She found the bolts by feel. Four of them, painted the same bronze as the rest of the railing, tucked where the caterers' string lights threw more shadow than light. She worked them loose one at a time, unhurried, the way she'd learned to hit a mark on set — no wasted motion, no tell.
When she pushed the railing, it gave. Just enough. She watched it flex out over the drop and felt something settle in her chest, calm and certain, the way she imagined snipers must feel. Then she stood, smoothed her gown over her hips, and walked back into the party like she'd only stepped out to check her lipstick.
No one was watching the cameras mounted above the terrace doors. No one would be, for weeks.
*
I wore my mother's pearls that night.
I'd told myself it was for courage, but standing under the gold light of the Mandarin Oriental's forty-seventh floor, watching three hundred people I half-knew orbit my husband like he was the only warm thing in the room, I understood it was closer to armor. I moved through the crowd the way I'd been trained to since I was small — a hand on an elbow here, a laugh in the right place there, my father's business partners calling me *sweetheart* like I was still twelve.
A journalist from the *Journal* found me near the bar. Young, sharp-eyed, her recorder app conspicuously not open. "Off the record," she said. "Has the — coverage — affected the domestic PR strategy at all? The NichLaila stuff."
"Hudson Group's fundamentals speak for themselves," I said, and smiled, and watched her write it down anyway.
Across the room, Nicholas laughed at something Laila whispered against his ear, his hand loose at her waist in a way that would have looked accidental to anyone who hadn't spent a decade learning the specific grammar of his hands. He didn't look for me. Not once, in two hours. I counted, the way you count contractions, some clinical part of my brain keeping time on a pain I refused to name.
I needed air.
The terrace was mostly empty, string lights swaying faintly in a wind that smelled like the river. I walked to the railing at the top of the marble stairs, the ones that swept down to the lower reception level in a long, photogenic curve someone's event designer had probably been very proud of. I set my hand on the cool metal and looked out at the skyline — my father's skyline, in a way, though his name wasn't on a single building in it anymore — and for one breath, I let myself just be still.
Then the railing gave.
There was no warning, no groan of metal, just a sudden absence where solid had been, my palm sliding through empty air, my balance gone before my brain had caught up to what was happening. I remember thinking, with strange clarity, *this is the last second I won't be in pain.* Then the stairs came up to meet me.
I don't remember all of it. I remember the marble against my shoulder, my hip, the back of my skull. I remember the sound my body made, dull and wet and wrong. I remember one of my mother's pearl earrings skating away across the floor, spinning once before it stopped, small and white under all that gold light.
Then the screaming started.
I was on my back at the bottom of the stairs. Blood was already spreading dark through the fabric at my hip, warm where the marble was cold. Someone's flash went off, and then another, and then it seemed like all three hundred phones in that ballroom turned toward me at once, a wall of tiny white lights.
I found the nearest one. A livestream, red dot blinking, held by a girl in green who'd forgotten to lower it.
I don't know where the words came from. I only know they were true, and that some part of me had been waiting a long time to say them where he couldn't pretend not to hear.
"I'm pregnant," I said, and my voice didn't shake at all. "And my husband never even bothered to find out."
Twenty feet away, Nicholas stood frozen with a champagne flute halfway to his mouth, his face draining of every color it had.
The ballroom went absolutely silent.
And somewhere in the dark beneath all those phones, the comment section was already exploding — thousands of strangers, watching my whole life come apart in real time.