“The same outfit that you used to get these ready for me five years ago, too.”

“So?”

Calmly, I met her eyes and didn’t look away.

“Don’t act strong in front of me. All these years, I only hoped you could live well, not like this.”

Like what?

In the glass of the car window, my own reflection appeared.

A simple training outfit, heavy boots and a small bag packed with groceries.

I looked like a regular family member barely managing her daily costs.

However, compared to the past, when I had to keep myself perfect every day, this was not so bad.

Not annoyed, I smiled.

“I thought it was okay.”

For a moment, her expression shifted slightly. “Archie, you really were different from before.”

“Yes, many people told me that.”

After saying that, I went upstairs, never turning back.

I pushed open the door to my fifth-floor apartment. The room looked the same as it had the year before.

Next to the old TV sat a picture of my mother in her military uniform; the candle in front of it had long gone out.

I lit three sticks quickly, tied my apron and stepped into the kitchen.

Three dishes and one soup were placed on the table in a short time. Across from me sat a bowl of untouched rice.

Slowly, I ate.

“Mom, today I ran into Charlotte.”

“Don’t get angry yet. Your son couldn’t be pushed around by her. And I wasn’t as stupid as before.”

Only the loud wind outside the window answered me.

With no desire to eat, I put down my utensils and walked into my room, taking out an old photo album.

“Look how tough you were back then. Staring at pictures all the time really was dull.”

Before I even opened the album, a picture slid to the floor.

I bent down to pick it up. The picture showed Charlotte, Alexander and me.

Three young faces smiled brightly at the camera.

I had dragged the two of them to stand in the center, smiling the biggest, my right cheek still holding the marks from training.

That was the summer when I was thirteen.

Debt collectors came to the house of the Morales family to cause trouble.

The neighbors shut their doors and windows and even my parents didn’t dare get involved. But I moved forward.

The stick that should have struck Charlotte instead landed straight on my face.

My cheekbone was crushed and I spent the entire summer healing.

Heartbroken, my mother ordered me to stop seeing the Morales family.

Until Grace Morales, dragging her injured leg, knelt at our door and thanked us over and over.

She softened.

For the next ten years, our dinner table always had a pair of utensils and a bowl set aside for Charlotte and she always got a share of new clothes during holidays.

When she wasn’t busy, she helped Grace run the small store and when someone came making trouble, she could shout at them so coldly that they didn’t dare come back.

They called each other sisters.

But no one imagined that the younger sister who once tripped over her words would end up in the bed of her older sister’s husband.

When I returned home, everything inside had been smashed apart.

My mother stood in the center of the ruins, crying hard, with clear handprints on her face, while my father stood in front of Grace behind him.

“Let’s end the marriage. You can take everything, I only want Grace.”

Beside me stood Charlotte, who hurried to pull Grace away, but my mother slapped her twice.

I pushed her aside, watching her fall to the floor, staring at me in disbelief.

In that moment, tears were falling then, but I still said the most painful words.

“Mom, why did you slap Charlotte?”

All those mixed memories stay stuck in this tiny photo.

After I divorced Charlotte, I burned everything tied to her, but one photo still slipped through.

Just as I was about to toss the photo into the trash can, a knock sounded at the door.

Thinking it was Caroline, the neighbor who always brought apple pie around this time, I opened the door.

But I saw Alexander holding Charlotte’s hand.

He laughed loudly. “Archie, long time no see! After all these years, you haven’t changed at all.”

“Charlotte couldn’t turn me down, so her sudden visit didn’t bother you, right?”

I quietly looked at the two of them.

“I didn’t ask you in. What did you want?”

Faced with my short response, Alexander looked a bit uneasy as he glanced at Charlotte beside him.

“Alexander wanted to check on you. He brought a gift, no bad thoughts.”

Charlotte set the gift box at the doorway.

Alexander quickly explained, “This razor worked well for me and I thought you might need one too. Back then, we shared things like this a lot.”

I lowered my eyes to look at it; it seemed to be the same kind the guard used.

“That picture…”

Alexander’s eyes grew wet, his voice rough. “Archie, after all these years, you still haven’t moved on.”

I crushed the photo into a ball and tossed it into the trash can. “You’re overthinking it.”

He lifted his hand as if he wanted to set it on my shoulder, then stopped halfway.

“I get that you’re holding something in your heart. If you were still together, today would be your wedding anniversary.”

“What happened back then wasn’t my choice. If you really let it go, let us take you out for a meal. If you had any difficult moments in life, just say it; we’re old comrades.”

I was about to refuse him right away. Suddenly, the altar candle sparked.

I gave a small smile and changed my answer. “Alright.”

Alexander became much more chatty and his little gestures kept coming.

While talking about their trip to Spain last month, he picked up lip balm and touched it to her lips while waiting at a red light.

“Every winter, I had to remind you, why did you never learn?”

Charlotte grabbed his hand, somewhat upset. “Stop that.”

“Oh, honey, I forgot Archie was here. Archie, you wouldn’t mind, right? Charlotte and I were always like this…”

I interrupted Alexander.

“Of course not.”

“I’ve watched you two rolling around in bed back then; this is nothing.”

The car turned quiet. It finally stayed still.

As I looked out at the road, I thought that if my mother had still been alive, she would have been shocked by all the changes.

Back then, my father insisted on divorcing my mom for Grace, nearly driving her out of her mind.

And my hidden marriage to Charlotte completely crushed her.

At the start, I only hated my father and Grace.

Their betrayal was what turned my mother from a clear and neat woman soldier into a doubtful and resentful woman.

Time slowly wore down her strength.

Later, I hated myself.

After arranging my mother’s funeral, I went alone to the border unit during what should have been my honeymoon, staying there for a month.

At that time, I didn’t hate Charlotte.

She was like a pearl lost in dust, a female soldier who had suffered yet stayed strong.

Before leaving, I asked Alexander to look out for her.

In our newlywed place, he cared for her well, cooking four dishes and a soup that were neat and delicious.

I truly felt grateful to him.

That year, the three of us grew even closer.

Charlotte treated me kinder and kinder.

With the money from my first merit reward, she spent everything to get me the tactical watch I liked.

On my birthday, she lit fireworks across the whole city to celebrate.

Each time we came back from field training, she would cancel all her schedules to stay with me.

I never doubted anything. She cared about me deeply.

Until one day, by chance, I went to her office by myself.

From behind the half-open break room door, I heard close noises.

I pushed the door wide.

Two naked bodies hit my eyes like sharp knives.

I cried out without control.

Her reaction was fast. “Who let you in!”

“Get out!”

I grabbed whatever I could reach and threw it at her like someone who had lost their mind.

Charlotte’s forehead was bleeding, yet she still tried hard to cover the man beside her.

I broke everything I could reach in the room. But I still did not dare step toward them.

They were the two people I had cared for most in my life.

Fear tightened in my chest and my teeth shook. “Alexander, look at me.”

He, with red eyes, tried to kneel toward me from under the blanket.

“Archie, I was wrong.”

“Charlotte and I should not have done this, but we truly love each other.”

“Please, please, grant us your blessing.”

His small, pressured look was almost the same as back then, when he was surrounded by thugs on the training ground.

Back then, to help him, I, as an outstanding trainee, had taken my first punishment.

Charlotte and I had given him our wedding bouquet in person, wishing him happiness.

Now he was in my wife’s bed, asking me to give them my blessing.

Tears dropped down my face and my voice shook. “When did it start?”

His lips trembled, unable to say a word.

She answered instead. “Does it matter? Haven’t you made enough trouble? This was a military camp, not your home.”

“Isn’t it important?! Charlotte! Isn’t it important?!”

I shouted until my throat hurt, my eyes burning red.

She quickly pulled on her coat, her eyes calm. “Fine! I’ll tell you!”

“Last March, when you pushed to go to the border post, that was when we started.”

“I didn’t hide it on purpose, but you had just lost your mother and I didn’t want to hurt you again, so I kept quiet and let this marriage stay as it was.”

“Alexander had already given too much; I couldn’t watch him break again. I planned to divorce you after your mother’s death anniversary.”

“Since you know now, we might as well say everything.”

“Let’s get a divorce. Say what you want. I only wanted Alexander.”

At that moment, I finally understood.

Back then, when I chose Charlotte’s side and pushed my mother away, how painful had it been for her?

Before I divorced Charlotte, I made a huge mess.

I took photos of them looking messy, printed them into flyers and dropped them into every company’s mailbox.

Banners showing their affair were hung all over the headquarters building.

I reported Alexander to the Political Department for wrongdoing.

The forum at the National Military Command University, where he studied, was packed with criticism.

At his graduation ceremony, I had paid someone to show our old photos on a big screen.

The memories I valued ended up turning into weapons, but Charlotte had protected him.

He finished his studies smoothly at the top National Military Command University.

He was even about to open a solo art exhibition.

To clear a path for Alexander, Charlotte finally came to face me.

“Alexander’s dream was about to happen; don’t trouble him.”

I was already out of control with anger.

“How was it trouble? I was ready to let everyone at the show enjoy your amazing pieces.”

A document was tossed at my face.

“If you wanted to keep your mother’s resting place safe, sign the divorce papers and stay away from me and Alexander from now on.”

When my mother was buried, I was crushed. Charlotte handled the whole funeral, including picking and buying the burial plot.

Now she was even moving things in that space in the martyrs’ cemetery.

I got angry and splashed the coffee on her face.

That night, I cried myself to sleep beside my mother’s grave.

The next day, I still went to the Political Department to finish the official paperwork.

The outcome was not what I expected; Charlotte only handed me an old family apartment that was already worn down.

“You reported me for breaking rules and now most of my assets have been frozen. This is all I could give you.”

“If Alexander had not spoken up for you, you would not have gotten a single coin.”

I had never been able to win against Charlotte, not even when I was young.

She was calm and careful, never acting on impulse and she knew how to use plans and status to get what she wanted.

Since I was the kind of person who rushed in without thinking, I often attacked in a way that hurt them a lot but hurt me even more.