Three Years Later

Bailey…

I drove the long road down to pack. I hated this drive. It was like returning to hell for me. Lotus Shadow Pack. My very own version of hell. Though, three years away, studying had been truly amazing. Transforming myself into the woman I should always have been. Confident. Self-assured. Brave. Just me. And now a fully qualified teacher.

As a she-wolf, you spend so many years of your life being told your focus is finding your fated mate. Settling down with them and creating a strong matebond. A love. A family. Well, once I had come to accept that my naïve, teenage dreams would never surface, thanks to the moon goddess pairing me with a mate so incapable of loving anyone other than himself, I decided that my focus would be my career. My education had always been something I took great pride in. I loved to learn, and I had decided that I wanted to pass that gift along. I no longer cared what others thought of me. And, while at university, it felt so wonderful to be surrounded by others who felt the same way. I finally felt like I fit in somewhere.

And, I believe that is what allowed me to become the person I was meant to be. However, now, I had to return to my pack, at their orders. The agreement was, once I had completed my degree, I would return home. Unless, of course, I had found my fated mate. But, I knew within my heart, that was never to happen. For, my fated mate sat at home. Lording it over our pack. Acting like he was the best thing since sliced bread. Sleeping with any she-wolf that came near him, from what I heard, having rejected me.

I pulled up at our guarded pack gates. Harley, one of our pack warriors, currently on guard duty, stepped forward to my car window. “ID” he ordered.

I frowned at him. I do not think I have been asked for ID before when returning home, even in all the times I have visited home, though in all fairness, those visits have been few and far between. My visits were only when they were required of me. I had grown to loathe this place, and coming back had become less of a priority for me over the time I was away...

“Harley, it is me. Bailey.” I explained, trying not to smile at his mistake.

Harley looked at me closer. “Shit. Sorry Bailey, didn’t really recognize you there. You changed your hair. And you aren’t wearing your glasses. You look good.” He says with a shrug, quickly looking away, clearly embarrassed by his faux-pas.

I smirk at his response. Yes, my hair is somewhat tamer than it used to be. The curls straightened out, and my hair now neat and sleek down my back. My glasses I had worn for reading had been long gone. Having got my eyes fixed with laser eye surgery whilst away. Plus, I now wore a little simple make-up to accentuate my features. Nice to know somebody has noticed a difference…

“No problem. You still need ID?” I asked him.

He grins at me. “I think I know who you are. Nice to see you.” he nods at me in acknowledgment as the gate opens for me. “Maybe catch you around while you are back.” He adds as I begin to drive away.

I smiled in response, I guess there would be nothing to stop me catching up with any guy I wanted to now. Not that I was really bothered right now... but it was not like I had a fated mate to wait for any longer. And it wasn’t like Miles was making a point of staying single. Every time I had returned home, he had had a different she-wolf on his arm. Parading them through pack like a prized possession, only to have traded her in by the time I returned on my next visit. He was turning into quite the lothario. And quite a joke in my eyes.

I set off along the quiet, familiar roads of our sweet old pack. The evening sun was settling in the sky as I moved my car down the route to my family home. No doubt my Mum would be there waiting for me, perhaps my Dad, if he was in from work by now. My brother and sister, I was unsure. They still both lived at home with my parents, but were back and forth to friends' homes and my brother was looking to move into the Beta suite in the packhouse soon enough, in preparation for taking on the role from my father when the time came. Either way, they rarely bothered to rush home to see me when they knew I was returning. I don’t think seeing me was at the top of their priority list…

I pulled my car up on the street in front of my familiar family home. I could not believe I was home. Stuck back here. The dread within my stomach churned heavily at the prospect of many years stuck here. Miserable and unhappy, with no way out, now my fated mate had rejected me. Not that anyone other than Miles and I knew of that. No. He had decided he would be considered weak if others knew an Alpha had gone against the powerful Moon Goddess’s choice. So, this was our secret. Or he would make me pay in ways I did not want to imagine, apparently.

And, in all honesty, I did not want to think of it. He had allowed me to go away to do my degree. Doing the final bit of convincing when my Uncle, the current Alpha, and Miles’s father, along with my parents were on the fence. Or, so he said. How true that was, I would never likely know the truth, but it had been for that reason, and that alone I had chosen to do as he had asked.

If he had done the things he said, then he had allowed me to fulfill my dream of gaining my degree of teaching away from pack. To allow me to be just me, not the daughter of the pack Beta. And I have thrived because of it. But, now, I had to return. Back to where I belonged. And, while I may have gained my degree, I had no real future prospects. I was likely stuck here.

I stepped from the car, determined more than ever to find work, as I heard my Mum’s voice. “Bailey!” she greeted me from the porch steps, a big smile upon her face. “You look beautiful sweetheart.”

I smiled back at her, as I moved toward the front door. Only to see Miles leaving the house next door to ours. The Alpha home. Could I have timed my arrival home any worse?

His eyes met mine, giving me a dark stare before looking at my Mum. “Hi Aunt Brianna. You didn’t say she was home today.”

Mum smiled at Miles like she thought the world of him, though most of the time she generally did. “Ah, I think it slipped my mind. Bailey is home for good now, Miles. How wonderful is that?”

Once more, Miles gave me a dark stare. “Hmmm. Truly wonderful.” he said with some serious contempt in his voice.

‘You stay out of my way unless I say otherwise, you understand?’ Miles mindlinks me, as he moves toward his car.

“Are you not going to speak to him Bai?” Mum tries. “He will be Alpha this time next year, you know?”

“Oh it doesn’t matter, Aunt Brianna. Bailey will be excused this time. I am sure she is tired from her drive back home. But no doubt I will be seeing her around. And yes, she will have to get used to me as her senior. Her Alpha.” He says with a sneer, and at his words my stomach twists into knots. I don’t think I can stay here… I not only need to find work, I need to find work away from my pack, so I can move away to get away from my psychotic Alpha and ex-mate!

Bailey…

I sit out in the garden drinking my morning coffee, with my laptop open scrolling desperately through the job vacancies, when I hear a deep growl to my left, causing me to swirl my head to look. Miles was resting his head on the garden fence from next door, overlooking our back garden, to where I was sitting. Watching me intently, the look upon his face was one of sheer disgust...

I had no clue how long he had been standing there, or what had angered him to the point of growling, but he had made me jump. “Fucking hell, Miles.” I snapped, giving him a dark scowl. I had done well the past week since arriving and stayed out of his way. Managing to ensure I avoided all pack events, and ensuring I dodged any places he was likely to be. Yes, it meant I spent an awful lot of time in my bedroom at home, but I would rather do that than have to deal with him.

Today, the sun was glorious, and I thought it would be nice to take my breakfast outside while I looked for jobs online. Sitting on the patio furniture we have in the back garden, under the warmth of the morning sunshine, my coffee was enjoyable, all until this stupid fucker disturbed me. I shook my head in his direction, wondering why he had snuck up on me. He had so many more places he could be...

“Who do you think you are cursing at?” Miles snarled.

“The creep who did exactly that. Crept up on me out of the blue for no good reason.” I rolled my eyes at him in disgust, only to see this seemed to anger him further. Though, I think anything I did would anger Miles. He seemed to hold some serious resentment towards me at the moment, but should I really expect anything less?

“I will come over there and deal with you, Bailey.” He hissed.

“Deal with me?” I questioned his choice of words. “Deal with me how? You asked me to stay out of your way. That is what I am doing.”

“What are you doing?” he chose to ignore my words, and looks to my laptop screen instead, so I slowly shut the screen down, so he would be unable to see. I do not want him knowing I am applying for work outside the area. I would not put it past him to stop it from happening. He seems to be being deliberately nasty of late, so I truly do not know what he would sink to, in order to be nasty towards me…

“Nothing of your concern.”

“I am your Alpha. So, all that goes on in my pack is my business.” He tells me with a smirk.

I shook my head with a smirk back, “Hmm, not quite Miles, you are not. Your Dad is still Alpha, so don’t be getting ahead of yourself.”

An angry look flared across his face once more. His handsome features contorted in fury. He did not like having people disagree with him. But I was not about to have him dictating to me...

“Just because you were my mate once upon a time does not give you the right to talk to me however you please, you know.” Miles snarls.

“She is your mate?” a voice questions, causing us both to whip our heads round, only to see the unexpected face of Miles’s younger brother Ellis.

I look at Miles with despair now, my heart pounding within my chest and my palms becoming sweaty. Wondering what the hell he planned to do now the secret we had kept between us for so long was out now… how had neither of us heard him coming?

“No she is not. She rejected me.” Miles said coldly, looking at me as if daring me to disagree with him.

Wait... he was making it out like I had rejected him? I looked at Miles in shock, but the look within his eyes was like he dared me to argue.

“You rejected your Alpha? What kind of fool are you?” Ellis asked as his eyes looked me up and down like a piece of dirt. Sadly, a look I am more than used to. “Do Mum and Dad know?”

Miles shakes his head. “No. I don’t want them to either. It would worry them too much, Els, please do not say anything. Bailey and I were never a good match, so perhaps she made the right choice. Please for me?” Miles is pleading with his brother, and part of me wonders if he is worried what his family would do if they learned of his decision to go against the Moon Goddess. As an Alpha, this was almost unheard of. Blaming me was gutless. But, if that is what he wants to do, then let him.

‘Do not even think of saying anything different.’ Miles’s voice reverberates through my mind via the link. ‘Or you will learn to regret it. That degree you love so much could easily be destroyed.’

I took in the words Miles had said, and the sad thing is, I do not doubt them. I would not put it past him finding a way to have my degree removed. Having me stuck within our pack. He would be Alpha soon enough, and he would be the one able to dictate what I did... I had little choice but to do as he asked. Yet i felt anger racing through my veins...

I lifted my laptop and stood from my seat. “I will talk to you however I like Miles. When you seem to think you can treat me however you like.” and with that I walked away from the two brothers, both looking at me, walking away in shock. I know I would come to regret what I had just said, but I truly no longer cared…

Asher…

I pace the corridor of the packhouse for yet another night. Sleepless nights are becoming the most repetitive thing for me now. Almost tiresome… or they would be if I could actually fucking sleep! Nightmares plaguing my dreams were the thing stopping my sleep… making me fear sleep… visions of that night… reoccurring time and time again… the rogues invading our pack lands… us losing control… and them hurting my precious Isla. My beautiful Isla.

Fate had barely brought us together before snatching us apart… life could be cruel… and it made me relive that night, time and time again through my dreams… the pain as her life ebbed away… the inability to be able to save her… the pain in her eyes… the fear… it made me hate life… hate fate. And now, now it makes me fear sleep. Which is what found me pacing these godforsaken corridors every night…

“Alright Beta!” Marc, one of our young warriors, greeted me enthusiastically, telling me he had likely been out spending time with friends. Especially returning to his room at this early hour of the morning.

“Hey Marc.” I smiled, raising my eyebrows questioningly at him as he stumbled toward the stairs. He was barely able to walk in a straight line.

“I not been dinking, honest boss.” He mutters with a chuckle. These guys make me smile. How could they not? Barely past shifting age, and newly trained warriors. They clearly decided to drink themselves to the point of stupor. Which, considering we are werewolves and alcohol has little to no effect on us in small doses, they had to have been drinking excessive amounts! Likely coming up with new and different drinking challenges to see who could drink the most, that was what they so often did.

But, I can’t say I had not done the same when I first shifted and on many a younger night with friends. It was all part of growing up for many, wasn’t it? Especially for our warriors, I knew that, having helped many a drunken warrior home in the past. And I am sure they had had a good night and many good memories to look back on… if they could actually remember any of them, of course!

“I never said a word Marc.” I gave him a nod as he fell up the stairs.

I continued my pacing of the corridor only to hear a few more drunken voices approaching, I assume likely Marc’s drunk friends. And, I, not in the right frame of mind to have to deal with anyone else tonight, ducked into the short corridor off the main hallway of the packhouse. Leading to my office. I could sit in here until they passed and then make my way back to my room, and hopefully, I could attempt to gain at least a few hours’ sleep tonight, so I would be at least partially functionable tomorrow…

“What are you doing down here?!” a voice made me jump awake from my sleep, making me stir, and realize just how uncomfortable I was. My whole body ached. The crick in my neck felt like it had been locked in a vice... Though, as I moved, it was only then I realized I had fallen asleep sitting at my office desk. I had been asleep collapsed over my office desk since the early hours of the morning when I came in here to hide from the drunken warriors…

I sleepily raised my eyes upward, only to see my best friend, and the pack Alpha, standing next to my desk looking more than a little concerned, looking down over me. “Asher?” he questioned. “Why are you sleeping down here? This has to be the third or fourth time in a matter of weeks. And don't get me started on all the time prior to that.”

I sighed. Just what I need, him on my case. The third degree once again. Am I ok? Do I need some help? Support? That is likely what Caleb was about to start with… like always. He couldn’t help it. Though, I didn’t want to sound ungrateful. He was my closest friend after all, and he did just care. But, sometimes, some people just needed their space! It wasn’t like he could help… he couldn’t stop my suffering… this has been going on too long now…

“Was struggling to sleep, so I came down to work. I am guessing I must have crashed.” I told him. Not quite the truth, but it would do…

Caleb didn’t need to know that my sleep was so badly disturbed that I struggled to sleep every night. That my nights were so messed up I hadn’t slept properly since Isla had left…

“Is everything okay, Asher?” Caleb asked, and I could hear the concern dripping from his voice, like it so often does of late. “Eden said she has been worrying about you… that you just haven’t seemed yourself since the rogue attacks began. She said you seem so distant. So withdrawn.”

I shook my head with a disgusted roll of my eyes. So, they had been discussing me? Do they think that is acceptable? Yes, Eden may be his mate, and the Luna of the pack, as well as my friend, but I do not need to be some sort of sympathy case that needs to be sat and discussed between them over their evening meal! I am fine! I am the pack Beta for fuck’s sake. I focused my eyes upon my friend, a dark glare hopefully saying all I needed to.

“Caleb, you may be a friend, but please, for the love of god, fuck off. I am fine. Tired, yes. Stressed, yes. We have been dealing with rogue attacks regularly until lately. We need to work on improving the pack, which is what we are working on doing. It doesn’t come easily. It takes time. It takes energy and effort. So yeah, I am stressed and tired. Is that not my fucking job?” I snap, knowing I am already overstepping the mark talking to my Alpha in that way. He knew I had lost my mate because of these rogue attacks too, so you would think he would have shown at least a little understanding… but I wanted to continue going… needed to keep functioning or else I had nothing…

Caleb looks to me with a shake of his head. “Fine. Go get showered. You look like a fucking state. We have a meeting in half an hour.”